Death as a sexual attraction (Freund´s libido and destrudo theory)

[Epikur]

Anybody here wanting to CTB who is somehow attracted by the idea of death on an ... sexual basis? I don´t know how to express my feelings without being called a lunatic necrophiliac or the like ... among the ususal motivations like i am fed up, im am depressed and so on I have a strange attraction of death that somehow touches sexual desires. Anyone else?

 

[Gustav Hartmann]

Why don´t you want to be called a lunatic necrophiliac or the like? Are some reasons to kill oneself more "political correct" than others?

As long as I can think back I have the masochistic desire to be killed. Suicide is a realistic way to fulfill my desire. With increasing age a second reason came up, to avoid the bodily and mental decay due to old age. I am still alive because I am afraid to miss something and I hope to find ways to overcome this manifestion of SI in this forum.

 

[MyTimeIsUp]

You're not alone in those thoughts, I used to have them up until I worked through more trauma, processed things and eventually, the thoughts/feelings/'desires' went away, and now it's as if it never existed - it doesn't enter my thought process.

I promise plenty of people on this website have at one point in their life had those feelings. Remember we're all fucked up in some way on this website - it may just be some are embarrassed to express it or worried they will be penalised for it.

 

[Epikur]

Why don´t you want to be called a lunatic necrophiliac or the like? Are some reasons to kill oneself more "political correct" than others?

As long as I can think back I have the masochistic desire to be killed. Suicide is a realistic way to fulfill my desire. With increasing age a second reason came up, to avoid the bodily and mental decay due to old age. I am still alive because I am afraid to miss something and I hope to find ways to overcome this manifestion of SI in this forum.

Interesting idea. Of course, there´s no superior or inferior reason for it is my very private decision. On the other hand, I feel some guilt or shame or whatever you name it.