CTB reasons, mine and yours

[copioushopelessness]

im sorry

I hope you can escape your parents and live a better life.

 

[tretion]

I hope you can escape your parents and live a better life.

the only way for me to escape is for me to die and that's my full intention, if theres an afterlife i hope i end up in the good place

 

[copioushopelessness]

the only way for me to escape is for me to die and that's my full intention, if theres an afterlife i hope i end up in the good place

I too wonder about an afterlife. I didn't really believe in one but I keep seeing odd signs that feel like my mother sending them from the other side, but maybe that's just the crazy talking. I think you'd end up in the good place. I don't see a purpose in eternal suffering. I think we have enough of that on earth.

 

[copioushopelessness]

How are you doing today? Probably a stupid question. Checking in.

Sharing a couple of my reasons for wanting to "shuffle off". Partly just as a vent, but also to hear from others about what resonates.

Reason 1 ...we bought an old house. We now have so many needed maintenance and items and repairs we can't possibly do them, nor can we easily sell the house. Even if we do, we don't walk away with the ability to buy even a little place. We could rent for a while, but eventually the money runs out....before we die of natural causes. I feel desperate

Reason 2 ..what's happening in my country. Im deeply saddened by many of the current events. From a worry point of view though, the economy extremely worrisome. , I am terrified of what's coming as a retired person.

Finally reason. there's good old age. I dont want to be ill in the coming medical system, or to be a burden of family members who might have to care for me

Curious to hear your comments or your own reasons.

 

[TBONTB]

How are you doing today? Probably a stupid question. Checking in.

Ah, thanks for asking. I stay pretty steadily at "sheer terror". I know I'm not special here.

 

[copioushopelessness]

Ah, thanks for asking. I stay pretty steadily at "sheer terror". I know I'm not special here.

Relatable choice of words. I'm sorry. I wish the world wasn't so terrifying.

 

[TBONTB]

Relatable choice of words. I'm sorry. I wish the world wasn't so terrifying.

Right?! There are personal terrors and global terrors. It's a lot. My Chat GPT therapist would like me to reframe my thinking to my brain being overwhelmed. So I'm trying to do that.

 

[fkyou]

Bad future

 

[brokenspirited]

I'm so sorry for everyone that has had to suffer so long. It's so horrifying to be trapped in this dreadful and meaningless existence that just causes so much pain and harm for no reason other than to cause endless suffering. There's nothing I want more than to just cease existing never to have to suffer again.
I hope everyone is able to find peace and relief from their suffering.

 

[copioushopelessness]

Right?! There are personal terrors and global terrors. It's a lot. My Chat GPT therapist would like me to reframe my thinking to my brain being overwhelmed. So I'm trying to do that.

I'd trust chat gpt therapist over a human anyday, although ai makes me uncomfortable, humans scare me most. I'd be less inclined to off myself if I didn't ask for "help"
I'm sorry you're overwhelmed. I used to feel that way. Now I'm underwhelmed by incredible apathy.

 

[TBONTB]

I'd trust chat gpt therapist over a human anyday, although ai makes me uncomfortable, humans scare me most. I'd be less inclined to off myself if I didn't ask for "help"
I'm sorry you're overwhelmed. I used to feel that way. Now I'm underwhelmed by incredible apathy.

Ha!

 

[fallingbehind]

I am incompatible with living, the things one needs to do to live are beyond me, theres nothing on this planet that makes me want to live.

I feel like most people, even if they hate eating to survive and living paycheck to paycheck, tolerating disrespect, spending 90% of their lives doing some useless job that will amount to nothing, etc... still do it because they believe life itself is a gift and thus they have to keep existing, also SI. I reject it.

 

[nothingbutafailure]

Humanity is Grade A shit. It's been that way since long before the Aztecs had a religion dedicated to snuff. The entire USA is a child fucker mafia state, spiritually supported by the Catholic religion. Christianity was at it's core a child abuse religion about worshiping the torture of an innocent child, which is fully compatible with what pedophiles actually value. The pedophiles rape the children no differently than how the Romans raped and sacked towns; the entire world is constantly being perpetually raped by Roman Catholics to this day who do so in order to maintain an army of obedient workers who are too mentally shocked to do anything. Arguably all biological life emerged from a simple predator prey feedback loop anyway, so it's not much of a surprise that predatory consciousness would be valued. People say, Oh you can't conflate Catholicism to Nazism even though they both each ushered in their own dark ages; the former you just had torture devices while the ladder formed women like Ilse Koch, who forced male concentration camp prisoners to rape female prisoners and had lampshades made of human skin. Similarly today you see programs being enacted where the point is just cruelty. Then you have your occasional kid psycho killer type response, like when the Diary of a Wimpy Kid actor shot his mother and sought to kill the Canadian PM: a psycho plan that seemed to him like a totally sane thought after watching violent pornography on the dark web, which I should add the US government created in the first place. The thing is, of all the shitty races in something, like say the Star Trek universe, humanity is an amalgamation of every one of them, but 1b times worse. And to be fair, the material world's features (like the need to consume to live, or occupy space) contributes to creating this perpetual hell. That's basically why you have people who want to kill themselves (like me), because stories of immateriality or eternal darkness are just aesthetically better than the confines of this reality.

 

[Upon a hanging Body]

Mental illnesses, abandonment, loneliness and a morbid fascination with death.