Courage

[Ednospatient]

How do people find the courage to jump off a building or jump in front of a train? I don't have the balls to do so

 

[LoneMisery]

I wish i knew too. Ive been smashing food like crazy. Its hard to give up when i can just go stuff my face with an entire pizza. But i feel one day even that good feeling will leave me like every other good feeling ive ever had

 

[Umbrella Weather]

That is a different type of demon... To me that feels retributive, like you want to punish people with your death.

There is a different mindset here, methinks: We are searching for a peaceful, painless death which invokes the least amount of damage possible.

 

[summers]

How do people find the courage to jump off a building or jump in front of a train? I don't have the balls to do so

Strong drugs for most of them (not sarcasm). It not balls or courage that allows you to use any method, it's coming to the realization that dying is better than living. I'm going to ctb in a couple months, but if I had to jump off a building, I may push that back some. My life isn't that bad yet. Give me some pure F that I can inject, and I would have no second thoughts on following through with my plan.

 

[Shu]

Capital Steetz jumped off a building. I have no idea how he had the courage to do it.

 

[lonerclown666]

i think jumping its easy just dont think and do it and in a few minutes you will be gone

 

[new.solution1]

i think jumping its easy just dont think and do it and in a few minutes you will be gone

That's how I felt when I got to the edge. I wasn't planning on doing it that day, it was mental practice. But it felt very easy to do, don't think, just move like a emotionless robot and do it.

 

[Al Cappella]

I don't know. I do wonder if ppl don't drink a little first, or take something to disinhibit them. The instinct to not do that, I imagine, would be quite intense, which is why only a very small number ever do it…

 

[LostAllHope88]

I keep asking myself that about my mom. My whole life she seemed afraid of just about everything, always anxious and definitely not one to take risks. But in September somehow she managed to shoot her self with a shotgun.

I still don't know where she found the courage to pull the trigger as I've been planning for my exit but keep pushing back the date out of fear of nonexistence. Hoping maybe I'll get a random wave of despair that will motivate me to act instead of speculate.

 

[LostAllHope88]

Idk, that doesn't make sense. Kind of like saying I hope I get paralyzed or some shit like that. If you need a wave of despair to ctb, then maybe you should try to fix things and live for a while.

Bold of you to assume that I can fix things. I'm living with HIV, have over $100,000 in debt I can never pay back in this lifetime, about to be homeless, my vehicle just broke down on me, and my mother died and left me nothing while my father is even more in debt than I am.

I was also in a car accident that, while causing me to lose a third of the muscle tissue in my left arm, still doesn't qualify me for disability since I wasn't dismembered. I just have to deal with the chronic pain every day, and frankly I'm tired of it. That doesn't mean I can't be afraid of not existing.

 

[summers]

That doesn't mean I can't be afraid of not existing.

Sorry. I misconstrued the meaning of your post. It really read (to me) like things could get better. Definitely did not mean to minimize your troubles.

Deleted my post.

 

[LostAllHope88]

Sorry. I misconstrued the meaning of your post. It really read (to me) like things could get better. Definitely did not mean to minimize your troubles.

Deleted my post.

No worries, thank you for understanding. I wish they could get better, probably wouldn't even be on here if they could.

 

[jimmy7754]

Bold of you to assume that I can fix things. I'm living with HIV, have over $100,000 in debt I can never pay back in this lifetime, about to be homeless, my vehicle just broke down on me, and my mother died and left me nothing while my father is even more in debt than I am.

I was also in a car accident that, while causing me to lose a third of the muscle tissue in my left arm, still doesn't qualify me for disability since I wasn't dismembered. I just have to deal with the chronic pain every day, and frankly I'm tired of it. That doesn't mean I can't be afraid of not existing.

Omg I'm so sorry

 

[TheWood]

I think that those who ctb with a violent death (for example, those who jump from great heights, or jump in front of a train), for the most part, do it impulsively. People who don't care how their dismembered body will shrink, or the pain right after impact. Not everyone dies instantly. In addition to courage, I'd also say great despair

 

[Gsvko]

I've always found jumping to be easy. If I have proper height and easyish access. I'm used to jumping into water from big heights, head first and there's not much to it. Whereas with some other methods, they require more planning and they don't feel familiar, any extra work is much when energy is low.

 

[Ednospatient]

I've always found jumping to be easy. If I have proper height and easyish access. I'm used to jumping into water from big heights, head first and there's not much to it. Whereas with some other methods, they require more planning and they don't feel familiar, any extra work is much when energy is low.

Once you're standing on the edge, it suddenly becomes a hell of a lot harder.

 

[Gsvko]

Once you're standing on the edge, it suddenly becomes a hell of a lot harder.

Or once you're holding N/SN, once the rope is around your neck...

 

[summers]

Once you're standing on the edge, it suddenly becomes a hell of a lot harder.

I think if anyone wants to jump, you have to run full speed toward the edge, and hope you can't stop.

Definitely not the way I want my last few seconds to be.

 

[Rational man]

Bold of you to assume that I can fix things. I'm living with HIV, have over $100,000 in debt I can never pay back in this lifetime, about to be homeless, my vehicle just broke down on me, and my mother died and left me nothing while my father is even more in debt than I am.

I was also in a car accident that, while causing me to lose a third of the muscle tissue in my left arm, still doesn't qualify me for disability since I wasn't dismembered. I just have to deal with the chronic pain every day, and frankly I'm tired of it. That doesn't mean I can't be afraid of not existing.

That's awful that someone can loose their home because they have a medical condition and that homelessness adds to the situation. I assume you'd be in USA. People in UK should get their medicines at no cost under the NHS . Im in pain too but can't be cured.

 

[FuneralCry]

I believe that in many cases, people get the courage to ctb when they are desperate and the pain of living gets to be unbearable. Suicide is so difficult as even know we want to die, we are programmed to survive. I wish that I could just fall asleep and never wake again.

 

[anxious_depressive]

A feeling of despair.

Or their life has become so unbearable that even death is not so terrible.

 

[Ednospatient]

A feeling of despair.

Or their life has become so unbearable that even death is not so terrible.

I'm currently in that situation but I still can't make myself do it

 

[Someone123]

How do people find the courage to jump off a building or jump in front of a train? I don't have the balls to do so

Knowing the results people get I think it would be easier to jump from a height I had confidence in, like twenty stories, because you only have to force yourself for maybe a second or two and then in six seconds or so it most likely will be all over, though your brain might take a few minutes to pass from that point. With a train it is harder, I think, knowing that results vary much more and that you have about a 1/3 chance of surviving, possibly with missing limbs, paralyzed, in the hospital for a long time, etc. There is a myth thaqt you can lie your head across the rail and be decapitated, but this won't work- the train will hit your body before your head and you'll go flying-or else get pulled under the train, and that must be extremely terrifying and people often survive this with the worst injuries. Trains usually have something over the place for each rail to push away debris, so the idea that you can lay your neck across the rail and be decapitated won't work.

 

[anxious_depressive]

I'm currently in that situation but I still can't make myself do it

the survival instinct is damn strong.

I'm sorry you feel that way.