Confusion about existence

[Endlichkeit]

I frequently ask myself what is all this? What am I and what am I doing here?
These are some questions that no language can answer. I feel like there is an infinite amount of them. And probably there are also things that we cannot even put into questions and will never be able to express. The system that can answer any possible question and express anything can never be created. Gödel's incompleteness theorems hint at this. But also quantum mechanics with it's subjectivity and randomness. Anyway any scientific theory also needs an interpretation, and we can never know if any interpretation is "correct". There's no such thing as absolute truth. We just happened to appear in some very strange place and were also "gifted" suffering. What is even suffering? Truly nothing has any meaning. All is absurd. Why do we even bother to study, work, have friends, love? For what? Beaty is equal to the grotesque. The sublime is vulgar, and vice versa. We're in such a weird place, we should ask ourselves, why do we stay here? Or we don't have to ask anything. I don't know. What holds us? Some laws of thermodynamics? This is only a superficial answer. Why these patterns that are described by thermodynamics appeared in the first place? If I die, my death would be equally meaningless as my birth, and the tears of my family would have no sense, no purpose, they will cry into nothingness, and nothingness will take them also. Will they even exist after my death? There is no memory about anything that happened, and even if there was an absolute memory of all events that have ever taken place in this universe, then what, why should I care? I am everything, and with me everything ends, before me everything was undefined. Something like collective solipsism. I don't care if existence exists, it's neither good, nor bad. There's no meaning in my suffering and in my happiness. If there was any, I wouldn't care. I as the universe want to end, because I'm confused about my existence, and I will end.

 

[doneforlife]

I frequently ask myself what is all this? What am I and what am I doing here?
These are some questions that no language can answer. I feel like there is an infinite amount of them. And probably there are also things that we cannot even put into questions and will never be able to express. The system that can answer any possible question and express anything can never be created. Gödel's incompleteness theorems hint at this. But also quantum mechanics with it's subjectivity and randomness. Anyway any scientific theory also needs an interpretation, and we can never know if any interpretation is "correct". There's no such thing as absolute truth. We just happened to appear in some very strange place and were also "gifted" suffering. What is even suffering? Truly nothing has any meaning. All is absurd. Why do we even bother to study, work, have friends, love? For what? Beaty is equal to the grotesque. The sublime is vulgar, and vice versa. We're in such a weird place, we should ask ourselves, why do we stay here? Or we don't have to ask anything. I don't know. What holds us? Some laws of thermodynamics? This is only a superficial answer. Why these patterns that are described by thermodynamics appeared in the first place? If I die, my death would be equally meaningless as my birth, and the tears of my family would have no sense, no purpose, they will cry into nothingness, and nothingness will take them also. Will they even exist after my death? There is no memory about anything that happened, and even if there was an absolute memory of all events that have ever taken place in this universe, then what, why should I care? I am everything, and with me everything ends, before me everything was undefined. Something like collective solipsism. I don't care if existence exists, it's neither good, nor bad. There's no meaning in my suffering and in my happiness. If there was any, I wouldn't care. I as the universe want to end, because I'm confused about my existence, and I will end.

Confusion is where spiritual journey begins. How and why consciousness sprung from organic matter is a mystery. The key to all these questions lies in solving this mystery. But we don't have access to stuff happening post death or before birth. May be it is better that way ?

 

[Endlichkeit]

Confusion is where spiritual journey begins. How and why consciousness sprung from organic matter is a mystery. The key to all these questions lies in solving this mystery. But we don't have access to stuff happening post death or before birth. May be it is better that way ?

Another question is what's more fundamental: matter or consciousness? Probably the latter. I don't even know what "matter" is. The most fundamental and precise scientific theory that we have, quantum mechanics, only has tensors, and their multiplication (or wave functions, it depends on the problem). These are just some mathematical structures, there's no such notion as "matter" there. Consciousness is probably the basis of everything, and there's no objective reality, everything is just our subjective experience.

 

[INTJme]

I frequently ask myself what is all this? What am I and what am I doing here?
These are some questions that no language can answer. I feel like there is an infinite amount of them. And probably there are also things that we cannot even put into questions and will never be able to express. The system that can answer any possible question and express anything can never be created. Gödel's incompleteness theorems hint at this. But also quantum mechanics with it's subjectivity and randomness. Anyway any scientific theory also needs an interpretation, and we can never know if any interpretation is "correct". There's no such thing as absolute truth. We just happened to appear in some very strange place and were also "gifted" suffering. What is even suffering? Truly nothing has any meaning. All is absurd. Why do we even bother to study, work, have friends, love? For what? Beaty is equal to the grotesque. The sublime is vulgar, and vice versa. We're in such a weird place, we should ask ourselves, why do we stay here? Or we don't have to ask anything. I don't know. What holds us? Some laws of thermodynamics? This is only a superficial answer. Why these patterns that are described by thermodynamics appeared in the first place? If I die, my death would be equally meaningless as my birth, and the tears of my family would have no sense, no purpose, they will cry into nothingness, and nothingness will take them also. Will they even exist after my death? There is no memory about anything that happened, and even if there was an absolute memory of all events that have ever taken place in this universe, then what, why should I care? I am everything, and with me everything ends, before me everything was undefined. Something like collective solipsism. I don't care if existence exists, it's neither good, nor bad. There's no meaning in my suffering and in my happiness. If there was any, I wouldn't care. I as the universe want to end, because I'm confused about my existence, and I will end.

You don't sound very confused to me
The world exists because you're there to see it exist. And for all practical purposes it will cease to exist when you close your eyes for the last time. Everything is nothing but a play on perception and language-they create the universe around us. And also the reason why we all experience the world differently, because everyone speaks a different language and has a different perspective.

 

[Endlichkeit]

You don't sound very confused to me
The world exists because you're there to see it exist. And for all practical purposes it will cease to exist when you close your eyes for the last time. Everything is nothing but a play on perception and language-they create the universe around us. And also the reason why we all experience the world differently, because everyone speaks a different language and has a different perspective.

Yes, that's basically collective solipsism. But it doesn't make the world less weird.

 

[Tears in Rain]

I frequently ask myself what is all this? What am I...
These are some questions that no language can answer.

As to regards the question 'what am I?, maybe the answers are there, but you just don't think hard enough or long enough about the question.

Why do we even bother to study, work, have friends, love? For what?
............. We're in such a weird place, we should ask ourselves, why do we stay here? Or we don't have to ask anything. I don't know. What holds us?

By we, do you mean humanity? Everyone's just sticking to the script that they were given at birth. People are just going along to get along. Cows chewing the cud and following the herd, day-in, day-out.

Ultimately, I guess we're here to enjoy the rides in the amusement park.

Some laws of thermodynamics? This is only a superficial answer. Why these patterns that are described by thermodynamics appeared in the first place? If I die, my death would be equally meaningless as my birth, and the tears of my family would have no sense, no purpose, they will cry into nothingness, and nothingness will take them also. Will they even exist after my death? There is no memory about anything that happened, and even if there was an absolute memory of all events that have ever taken place in this universe, then what, why should I care? I am everything, and with me everything ends, before me everything was undefined. Something like collective solipsism. I don't care if existence exists, it's neither good, nor bad. There's no meaning in my suffering and in my happiness. If there was any, I wouldn't care. I as the universe want to end, because I'm confused about my existence, and I will end.

True, life has no meaning, but it can have purpose.

Confusion is where spiritual journey begins. How and why consciousness sprung from organic matter is a mystery.

They say the spiritual journey begins with self-inquiry, and cutting through all the confusion and bullshit.

Maybe you have it ass backwards. Maybe matter and everything else came from consciousness.

The key to all these questions lies in solving this mystery. But we don't have access to stuff happening post death or before birth. May be it is better that way ?

If reincarnation exists, it wouldn't make sense to remember any past lives you had. That would mess with your identity big-time.

Another question is what's more fundamental: matter or consciousness? Probably the latter. I don't even know what "matter" is. The most fundamental and precise scientific theory that we have, quantum mechanics, only has tensors, and their multiplication (or wave functions, it depends on the problem). These are just some mathematical structures, there's no such notion as "matter" there.

Science doesn't really know jack about what reality really is.

Consciousness is probably the basis of everything, and there's no objective reality, everything is just our subjective experience.

That's what the mystics say. But if everything is a subjective experience, how can you know for sure that you're not truly alone in your own subjective world?

 

[Endlichkeit]

As to regards the question 'what am I?, maybe the answers are there, but you just don't think hard enough or long enough about the question.

I've been thinking about it for quite a long time. I've had dozens of psychedelic experiences, but still no satisfactory answers.

how can you know for sure that you're not truly alone in your own subjective world?

I cannot be sure.

 

[Tears in Rain]

I've been thinking about it for quite a long time. I've had dozens of psychedelic experiences,

LSD is seen as a gateway drug to spiritual awakening. Did the psychedelic experiences broaden your views on life at all?

but still no satisfactory answers.

What's the question that you are specifically looking for an answer to? And why?

 

[Namarupa]

No one has yet been able to define purpose in existence without resorting to circular reasoning. That's Nietzsche's greatest flunk and the reason he won't be remembered as anything other than a brilliant philologist.

 

[Endlichkeit]

LSD is seen as a gateway drug to spiritual awakening. Did the psychedelic experiences broaden your views on life at all?

Yes, these experiences certainly influenced my worldview, I realised the subjectivity and relativity of everything.

What's the question that you are specifically looking for an answer to? And why?

The questions that I posed in my post. Why? I don't know, but I feel that I need to know. Maybe that's another question.

No one has yet been able to define purpose in existence without resorting to circular reasoning. That's Nietzsche's greatest flunk and the reason he won't be remembered as anything other than a brilliant philologist.

I always found it strange that he proclaimed the Übermensch as "the meaning of Earth", and generally had anti-nihilistic views, while also adhered to the concept of eternal return. If by his logic everything is meant to repeat infinitely many times, and everything is predetermined, then how can he find any meaning in this?

 

[Tears in Rain]

The questions that I posed in my post. Why? I don't know, but I feel that I need to know. Maybe that's another question.

If you really wanted to know, then your self-inquiry would lead you to the answer.
But you don't seem to really know what you want.

I always found it strange that he proclaimed the Übermensch as "the meaning of Earth", and generally had anti-nihilistic views, while also adhered to the concept of eternal return. If by his logic everything is meant to repeat infinitely many times, and everything is predetermined, then how can he find any meaning in this?

Nietzsche never really explained what he meant by Übermensch, but he definitely wasn't anti-nihilist. He seemed to be one of the most nihilistic philosophers ever in my view.

He seemed to be like Carl Jung when writing the Red Book; Nietzsche seemed to be trying to 'break on through to the other side', without using psychedelics.

 

[Endlichkeit]

If you really wanted to know, then your self-inquiry would lead you to the answer.
But you don't seem to really know what you want.

No, this is not the case, some questions cannot be answered even if you really want to find an answer.

He seemed to be one of the most nihilistic philosophers ever in my view.

This is simply incorrect. I think, you have not read his works, because this is a very common misconception. He claimed that nihilism came from christianity and christian-like monotheistic religions (and on the deeper level from slave morality), which regard this world as secondary to some other worlds, like heaven. He sought to confront and overcome nihilism with the creation of new values and the reevaluation of existing ones. For this he proposed the idea of the Übermensch as an individual who creates their own values and meaning in life. So he's a nihilist only in the sense that he's nihilistic towards nihilism itself, equivalently an anti-nihilist.

 

[tbroken]

I constantly have these feelings, but imo is caused by the absence of love in my life and continuity.
I liked to be around always the same ppl at work and be a part of something in the good or in the bad, but in the world as it is now, ppl are constantly changing their mind and hating their life. Is really annoying from my pov.

 

[theboy]

are existential questions to reflect on, although there are some that do not have an objective or concrete answer. In the end, the meaning of life is the responsibility of each person to find it. Regarding the other questions, they are of philosophical scope where anyone who answers them can be right.

 

[Tears in Rain]

No, this is not the case, some questions cannot be answered even if you really want to find an answer.

True, but the ones you asked can, you just don't really want the answer.