R_N

R_N

-Memento Mori-
Dec 3, 2019
1,442
For example, I can listen to someone and their words can resonate with me emotionally still. But when I start thinking about it and dig deeper, I realise I don't truly agree with what is said.

It seems there is always a disconnect between what I feel and what I consider 'true'. And what I feel are usually values I was given at young age by everyone around me.

So, how is this supposed to work?


In the past I felt and did like everyone else. My truth was always what I felt strongly about or at all. But now, there is a divide between thinking and feeling.

I am not looking for a compromise but it feels like I am split in two and it's conflicting. Sometimes I am not sure in which way should I act when I interact with others either.



Maybe it doesn't even matter. But I think about it and I was wondering if someone is experiencing something similar.
 
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ConfusedClouds

Specialist
Mar 9, 2024
319
Kind of - like I will often look back at a conversation and feel massive regret/rumination about something I said or a reaction I expressed. As if I was lying or incorrect/inaccurate. But then the process of trying to correct it retrospectively makes everything into a bigger deal or brings up something that was totally forgotton/irrelevant to anyone else.

This even happens with my therapist which is super frustrating and confusing if I am supposedly trying to be open and honest.

Reached a point of self isolation to avoid the chaos in my mind of trying to work out what was OK or not or true or not or suitable or not after most interactions with others.
 
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