Discussion Closing the site to the public

[mahakaliSS_MahaDurga]

I have been thinking about this site being visible to guests (anyone really), and I am not sure that is a good idea. This way, anyone can take screenshots of different comments and interpret them out of context. This site is under constant watch by various pro-life groups and I do not think that it is wise to give them free access to everything that is being posted here.

I would like to know what others think about this.

 

[woxihuanni]

Agree. Apart from stickied resources, there is no need for public eye. There can be some recovery resources stickied, too, to reflect the recovery section.

 

[sadworld]

I think that's a good idea but they could still just register and then they'll see everything... and also, I don't think we have anything to hide.

 

[Garbage Person]

I said no. If the rules are followed that are listed here, there shouldn't be a concern. When people violate them, it gets cleaned up. If the only thing preventing someone from collecting information is making a basic account, people will just create the account, especially if they have some censorship agenda. I think more regulations are generally a slippery slope.

 

[GoneGoneGone]

I said no. If the rules are followed that are listed here, there shouldn't be a concern. When people violate them, it gets cleaned up. If the only thing preventing someone from collecting information is making a basic account, people will just create the account, especially if they have some censorship agenda. I think more regulatons are generally a slippery slope.

You'd be surprised but people are lazy to make accounts especially since they have to give a strong motivation for joining.

 

[woxihuanni]

The question is not not having anything to hide, but why should vultures watch our pain? I vent here when my body is sick with fear that I have to die.

 

[Garbage Person]

@woxihuanni That's a really good point and I'm rethinking my stance. I was mostly considering people who have an agenda and they'll feed off of us regardless of any digital hurdles, some people will have nothing better to do. Either way, your post made me think and I'm sorry you're in so much pain.

 

[woxihuanni]

@woxihuanni That's a really good point and I'm rethinking my stance. I was mostly considering people who have an agenda and they'll feed off of us regardless of any digital hurdles, some people will have nothing better to do. Either way, your post made me think and I'm sorry you're in so much pain.

Thank you for your compassion...

 

[Brick In The Wall]

I think Suicide Discussion should be closed to guests but Recovery and Off Topic could remain open. SD is where we catch all the heat from anyways.

 

[XYZ]

I am not sure where I stand. I'm gonna have to give this some thought. On the one hand I was a lurked for a very long time before joining, so it'd be downright hypocritical of me to vote NO and thus deny others the opportunity to browse the forum without joining, as I once used to do. On the other hand, @mahakali88, @woxihuanni and @GoneGoneGone make some valid points. I'll get back to you

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

I completely agree with the assertions in the OP and think they were well-stated.

These are my additional thoughts...

This site invites folks to share stuff that's deeply personal in order to get support, support that it's nearly impossible to find elsewhere irl. But then the deeply personal is publicly exposed to anyone who finds this site, including those who oppose it, and many of those who read are people who will do many of the same things irl that folks come here to have a sanctuary from -- negate, twist, shame, attack.

Granted, people can still join anonymously and screenshot, etc., but the exposure would be significantly limited. It's not just about the pro-life opposition, there are also some sick folks in the world who get off on or are merely entertained by watching a goodbye thread, reading about someone's trauma, watching interpersonal dramas play out, watching a predator or a troll provoke people and all the reactions to that. I wonder how much negativity would decrease and how much peace would increase if the space were contained rather than exposed.

The only thing I like about the pro-life groups watching is that it does add some accountability. If harmful things are going on, because of the public shame factor that would motivate necessary healthy change that might not otherwise happen.

A main draw of this site is methods. So many people lurk and never join because they can get the methods, and beyond that, there are those who don't want or need the support, they don't want their personal stuff on a public forum, they're underage -- there are lots of reasons for not joining. It's easy enough to have a main page that says what's at the top of the suicide discussion forum and much of what's in the rules and FAQ to help people make a decision about whether or not to join.

Since I don't just want to complain and stay stuck but consider solutions for forward movement, here's what I envision as one possible set of alternatives:

• Main page that says what's at the top of the suicide discussion forum, some of the text from the Rules and FAQ, and a link to the Suicide Resources Compilation.

• Suicide Resources Compilation made public. Members would be aware that if they post on any of those threads, it's public.

• Extra layers of personal protection:
  • Partners Megathread locked until a certain number of posts and a certain amount of time is reached. Mods verify people didn't shitpost or use the games threads to meet the post count, and at least start out proving they're not predatory, trollish, etc.
  • PMs and chat locked in the same way. (I get some folks may really be in need and are anxious for those functions, but there is plenty of support available until then on the open forums. Some folks want to jump right into one or all of the more intimate functions to feed off others, troll, or do harm...they're anxious, too, haha! Even if they lie or put on a false front, they still would have to put forth the effort to do so by posting until they "proved" safe enough to be given access.)

 

[GoneGoneGone]

I think Suicide Discussion should be closed to guests but Recovery and Off Topic could remain open. SD is where we catch all the heat from anyways.

I agree with @woxihuanni that suicide and recovery sticky resources should be left public, but the rest closed off. Maybe this thread could be moved to the Suicide Section so that more people could vote.

 

[woxihuanni]

I agree with @woxihuanni that suicide and recovery sticky resources should be left public, but the rest closed off. Maybe this thread could be moved to the Suicide Section so that more people could vote.

Yes it would be good to move for more votes.

 

[XYZ]

I am wondering if fewer users will join if the forum is not visible. I mean, it's pretty hard to imagine what people in the off topic and suicide section talk about, unless you actually see the forum.

Do you guys think the forum will stop growing as much as it has since 2018, if the forums are hidden?

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Mods verify people didn't shitpost or use the games threads to meet the post count

Damn, guilty as charged.

 

[Good4Nothing]

I voted no. This forum should remain public.

 

[XYZ]

But then the deeply personal is publicly exposed to anyone who finds this site, including those who oppose it, and many of those who read are people who will do many of the same things irl that folks come here to have a sanctuary from -- negate, twist, shame, attack.

This ^^ is such an important point.

 

[Garbage Person]

I wonder how many people find comfort here that aren't registered though. There are significantly more guests here at any given time. As long as the the resources were left public, I guess it doesn't really hurt anything. I wonder how a choice like this would impact mods, if at all.

 

[woxihuanni]

I am wondering if fewer users will join if the forum is not visible. I mean, it's pretty hard to imagine what people in the off topic and suicide section talk about, unless you actually see the forum.

Do you guys think the forum will stop growing as much as it has since 2018, if the forums are hidden?

Suppose time would show, but people who need info would want to join regardless. That was my motivation, at least.

I wonder how many people find comfort here that aren't registered though. There are significantly more guests here at any given time. As long as the the resources were left public, I guess it doesn't really hurt anything. I wonder how a choice like this would impact mods, if at all.

Some lurkers might join which may increase the mods' workload, but then having more members/contribution is overall not a bad thing.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

Damn, guilty as charged.

I did it. I've also recommended it. I'm thinking I won't recommend it anymore and let people figure things out for themselves.

 

[XYZ]

Ok, I am back with my verdict The wheels of my brain are turning slowly as always. I voted "no" to the question in the poll.

But, ideally, this is how I'd like it to be:

1. To have only the Stickied, Resources and Recovery posts visible for everyone.

2. To have the following options when I post or am quoted in the rest of the forum:
"Make my post/thread visible to everyone"
"Make my post/thread visible only to members"


Not sure it's possible, though. But it would be a good compromise, I think.

 

[woxihuanni]

Ok, I am back with my verdict The wheels of my brain are turning slowly as always. I voted "no" to the question in the poll.

But, ideally, this is how I'd like it to be:

1. To have only the Stickied, Resources and Recovery posts visible for everyone.

2. To have the following options when I post or am quoted in the rest of the forum:
"Make my post/thread visible to everyone"
"Make my post/thread visible only to members"


Not sure it's possible, though. But it would be a good compromise, I think.

That crossed my mind, too but I don't know how it would work. Especially if thread is public but some posts are private, etc.

 

[cii]

I completely disagree. Maybe we should be given the option to hide our threads from the public if we choose to, and since our method talk catches a lot of heat we could hide those. But in general? No. You shouldn't have to make an account to see that there are other people who are in the same boat as you, in my opinion. It's up to the admins though, nonetheless I'm fine with the way things currently are.

 

[Xocoyotziin]

I voted no. Secrecy stokes paranoia. The transparency that this site has with the greater public is one of its assets and imo is required for its continued functioning. Suddenly dropping off the map could be seen as an admission of guilt and brings it one step closer to matching the image of a death cult.

 

[Wayfaerer]

I think that's a good idea but they could still just register and then they'll see everything... and also, I don't think we have anything to hide.

At least with account creation they have to go through a vetting process even if it is a simple one.

 

[Deleted member 1465]

I voted no. Secrecy stokes paranoia. The transparency that this site has with the greater public is one of its assets and imo is required for its continued functioning. Suddenly dropping off the map could be seen as an admission of guilt and brings it one step closer to matching the image of a death cult.

That IS true, I've considered that. However, I can't but help feel that anyone on this site is considered as guilty whether they are open or sequestered behind closed doors. Can't win either way.

 

[itachi of death]

This is my favorite site to vent on and I feel extremely comfortable.Ohers only want to stop people from talking about death,because they assume that it will make their loved ones not so suicidal,which is the complete opposite in my opinion. On top of multiple people trying to shutdown this wonderful site of non judgemental opinions,so I vote no

 

[Xocoyotziin]

That IS true, I've considered that. However, I can't but help feel that anyone on this site is considered as guilty whether they are open or sequestered behind closed doors. Can't win either way.

At least this way anyone who's so inclined can visit the site and do their own fact checking. Close the site, all the public will have to rely on is the out of context screenshots that are taken by people who join disingenuously. I wouldn't underestimate the "spy" factor either. "Infiltrating" a community is thrilling and intriguing. Giving people something to infiltrate would provide an outlet for more sensationalism and more game-playing behavior disguised as virtuous action. And it would further the us vs them mentality, which I don't think is a healthy divide and only detracts further from understanding the reality of the situation, whatever that may be.
It seems regressive when the point is that this is something that people should be able to talk about openly.

 

[Deleted member 1465]

It seems regressive when the point is that this is something that people should be able to talk about openly.

I does, I believe you are not wrong. But I've ridden this rodeo for so long I can't but help feel that never the twain shall meet.

 

[woxihuanni]

At least this way anyone who's so inclined can visit the site and do their own fact checking. Close the site, all the public will have to rely on is the out of context screenshots that are taken by people who join disingenuously. I wouldn't underestimate the "spy" factor either. "Infiltrating" a community is thrilling and intriguing. Giving people something to infiltrate would provide an outlet for more sensationalism and more game-playing behavior disguised as virtuous action. And it would further the us vs them mentality, which I don't think is a healthy divide and only detracts further from understanding the reality of the situation, whatever that may be.
It seems regressive when the point is that this is something that people should be able to talk about openly.

This may be underestimating how contemptable and despicable we are to average Joe in or out of context. They are not scratching their heads trying to understand, they dehumanise.