I'm 25, and have been (unknowingly) ill my entire life due to a genetic disorder that had signs that weren't noticed by those around me. At 15, I became severely ill with unrelenting fatigue and pain. I've had gastrointestinal issues for my entire life, but only at 21 did I get diagnosed with a genetic connective tissue disorder and a multitude of comorbidities. I'm now on a list of medications that genuinely fills up a page of lined A4 paper, as well as awaiting multiple quite gruelling operations, including an ostomy and a surgery where they will break my pelvis in 6 places.
Most of my chronic illnesses will never be cured during my lifetime, and I've been disabled for a decade now. I'm unfortunately not even "sick enough" to qualify for medical euthanasia in Switzerland. I've lost out on dating, making friends, getting my degree and a job, time with family and friends, learning, going outside, exercising, hobbies, and I sleep more than half the day due to my illnesses. My memory is failing, I struggle to remember both long and short term memories. I am not even 30, and yet I can't imagine living much longer like this.
I rely on my best friend of almost 10 years to care for me. He does my laundry, cooks, cleans, goes to appointments with me, sorts my medication, goes on errands for me, reminds me to do things, and generally just makes sure as many of my needs are met as he can. I could not ask for a better friend. My other friends are wonderful, too. They're creative, smart fun people who make life more colourful, and also help out whenever needed. They're beautiful, inside and out. My family have been some of the most supportive people in my life, always offering to help with medical stuff, always being there for me, always trying to help. They want nothing but the best for me.
But I am tired. Physically, emotionally, spiritually, I am exhausted. I don't want to do this anymore. Animals with my conditions are put down out of kindness, so why am I not afforded the same kindness? Instead, I have to live until my body gives out from one of my conditions, which could be a few years or a few decades. I could have a "normal" life span, but it would not have quality of life. My QOL is poor as it is, and is only likely to worsen, I just want to end things while I still have the ability to.
Most of my chronic illnesses will never be cured during my lifetime, and I've been disabled for a decade now. I'm unfortunately not even "sick enough" to qualify for medical euthanasia in Switzerland. I've lost out on dating, making friends, getting my degree and a job, time with family and friends, learning, going outside, exercising, hobbies, and I sleep more than half the day due to my illnesses. My memory is failing, I struggle to remember both long and short term memories. I am not even 30, and yet I can't imagine living much longer like this.
I rely on my best friend of almost 10 years to care for me. He does my laundry, cooks, cleans, goes to appointments with me, sorts my medication, goes on errands for me, reminds me to do things, and generally just makes sure as many of my needs are met as he can. I could not ask for a better friend. My other friends are wonderful, too. They're creative, smart fun people who make life more colourful, and also help out whenever needed. They're beautiful, inside and out. My family have been some of the most supportive people in my life, always offering to help with medical stuff, always being there for me, always trying to help. They want nothing but the best for me.
But I am tired. Physically, emotionally, spiritually, I am exhausted. I don't want to do this anymore. Animals with my conditions are put down out of kindness, so why am I not afforded the same kindness? Instead, I have to live until my body gives out from one of my conditions, which could be a few years or a few decades. I could have a "normal" life span, but it would not have quality of life. My QOL is poor as it is, and is only likely to worsen, I just want to end things while I still have the ability to.
