Discussion Bullying Culture Needs to be Addressed.

[Kat!]

I've been looking into this a lot, this disgusting culture surrounding bullying, it disturbs me.
Columbine, is one of the most notable examples of a toxic school environment.

Students had segregated one another to avoid harassment and bullying, while some were bullies themselves.
Eric and Dylan were odd examples, two polar opposites, but both had their reasons for revenge.

Dylan had amassed more friends than Eric, surprisingly, but Eric was the dominant one in their friendship, Dylan, was a follower. Eric was described as a narcissistic angry teenager, with a god-like mentality. While Dylan was an "angry depressive", who was low in self-esteem, and had crippling anxiety.

During one incident, later renamed the "tampon incident", Dylan Klebold was pelted by ketchup-covered tampons in a part of the school, he came home and said it was "possibly the worst day of his life."

These accounts are cast with doubt though, as multiple students had reported that they were both bullies, or victims of bullying. It is accounted to be both in Eric's case.

After the shooting, the school hadn't changed ways, during many interviews, even minutes after the initial raid by SWAT teams, students recalled them as "losers" "dorks" or part of the "gay trench-coat mafia."

I often wonder what would've happened if they had not been so rude to one another.
It seems like no one takes it seriously, until it is too late.

 

[Weary Soul]

Bullying definitely need to end. They tried an anti-bullying campaign in a school district near me. It did not work from what I have heard. A friend of mine had to resort to homeschooling because the bullying was so intense for her daughter.

 

[Kat!]

Bullying definitely need to end. They tried an anti-bullying campaign in a school district near me. It did not work from what I have heard. A friend of mine had to resort to homeschooling because the bullying was so intense for her daughter.

At my middle school it was the same. And I'm sorry for your friend and her daughter.
We lost 2 kids, and dozens left the school district to cyber because of the bullying. We had whole rallies about it organized by the board and still, the bullying continued.

 

[VisionsOfHell]

Most teachers are not even properly trained to deal with so many students. Where I live some classes have a size of up to 30 people, and it was brutal.

Especially when youre a guy like me who got into puberty very late you will become an easy target for some people.
And to make things even worse my parents never taught me how to fight back. Hence lots of anger and frustation built up inside me over the years.

 

[Viceroy]

Bullying definitely need to end. They tried an anti-bullying campaign in a school district near me. It did not work from what I have heard. A friend of mine had to resort to homeschooling because the bullying was so intense for her daughter.

Bullying is human nature. It's social competition driven behaviour. If you builly you win, if you're the bullee you lose. Humans are animals

 

[Weary Soul]

Bullying is human nature. It's social competition driven behaviour. If you builly you win, if you're the bullee you lose. Humans are animals

Yes, I am beginning to think this is sadly true and would add that maybe there is a genetic component as well (a survival trait to be dominant as opposed to non-dominant perhaps).

When I was bullied in grade school (and it was pretty bad), my mother always said, oh it is because they are jealous of you. I always thought to myself, what on earth do I have that someone needs to be jealous of??

I still cannot fathom bullying someone, it makes absolutely no sense to me on a personal level.

 

[VisionsOfHell]

Im very convinced that if you raise children properly and give them a good teacher you can prevent them from becoming bullies.

If you are interested watch this docmentary:

Its about an amazing teacher in a japanese elementary school. I doubt any of these kids will ever become bullies.

 

[Weary Soul]

Im very convinced that if you raise children properly and give them a good teacher you can prevent them from becoming bullies.
Its about an amazing teacher in a japanese elementary school. I doubt any of these kids will ever become bullies.

I hope so (I will watch in a minute). My grade school years were many, many years ago. Bullying was done by parents, teachers, kids, siblings, etc... In fact, my home environment was not just bullying, but extremely abusive.

I likely would have ended up much like them, except that I realized at a very young age that I wanted to be nothing like them.

Bullying can cause so much damage, I truly hope they do find a way to stop it.

Watched it: What a beautiful person.

 

[VisionsOfHell]

I likely would have ended up much like them, except that I realized at a very young age that I wanted to be nothing like them.

Bullying can cause so much damage, I truly hope they do find a way to stop it.

Good on you for breaking that cycle.

I think the key to stopping this is giving children more support in their emotional developent, as you saw in the video. Just having one person like that teacher in your life can make a huge difference

 

[Weary Soul]

Thank you.

You are right. I had one or two teachers who were very kind to me in small ways and it made a world of difference.

<3

 

[AutoTap]

There was one class where no bullying happened. It was my because the teacher was former military and carried a pvc pipe around and if he caught you misbehaving he'd walk up real close and slap your desk with it startling you even if you were prepared for it. It worked well because then kids would laugh. So no one bullied for the fear of being bullied. Kind of a weird way but it worked.

 

[Nicebuddimtim]

Sorry to trigger anyone but I disagree I believe bullying serves a purpose of establishing a pecking order. I was bullied for a long time in my younger years and I have been a bully at times. I don't really socialise with people anymore maybe due to bullying but it made me who I am. We don't live in a perfect world maybe instead of getting rid of bullying we should be teaching people better ways of dealing with those situations rather than just telling someone in authority. Teach people to be stronger and to have thicker skin and the problem fixes itself. There will always be bullies and victims in every circle it's down to you how you deal with that imo.

 

[LONE WOLF.]

All Bully's should be instantly expelled,No second chances!!!

 

[Nymph]

I agree, I was bullied as a child and I think it's probably one of the reasons why I'm so fucked up. It also tied to racism because I'm half Chinese and half European. I'd be made fun of because of my looks and hobbies... now I'm forever damaged, depressed, anxious and asocial. Bullying happens almost everywhere and it's extremely damaging, bullies should get into therapy (and get expelled obviously) and have the weight on them that they have been ruining someone's life.

 

[Squiddy]

All Bully's should be instantly expelled,No second chances!!!

One high school I went to had good rules for bullying. If you did it, you and your parent had to serve detention on Saturday. If you did it again, you were expelled. That's how it should be everywhere.

 

[sauvenchy]

Interesting, did it work how it was intended? Luckily i have never been bullied and i hate to see people being bullied. The problem was that bullying comes in different shapes and forms. Maybe I have bullied people without knowing, i don't think so, i hope not.

 

[stygal]

I have been bullied a bit in grade school - for the way I walked back then (had to wear leg braces at some point to correct my gait) and being "taller/bigger" than others.
It sucked a lot and one day some boys decided to batter me all at once but since I was a bigger I put up quite a fight (lol).
Anyways, I didn't "win" because I got lots of bruises and bled after they threw me to the ground.
But I managed to hold back tears until I was home.
After this incident they weirdly "respected" me and pretty much left alone expect for some snarky comments.
When I got into high school I luckily completely faded into the background and nobody even noticed I was there which is a comfortable state to be in.
Those few first years of getting bullied definitely stuck in my head and made me more cautious when it came to finding friends.
(In a weird turn of events one of my bullies later asked me out after we all finished school...the nerve)

 

[Deleted member 25508]

Bullying is human nature. It's social competition driven behaviour. If you builly you win, if you're the bullee you lose. Humans are animals

this is the cold reality of it... i think i read something a little while ago that said bullies are more socially successful in general. reading about human nature has pretty much turned me into an antinatalist. i think nothingness would be preferable to this weird game we're all forced to play, where you can "win" by "dominating" someone.

what i don't get is how anyone thinks this is good or normal. people are just like "it's human nature." yeah—that doesn't make it good.

 

[Sprite_Geist]

I disagree that bullying is always a part of nature, because there are a multitude of reasons for why someone would bully or abuse another person. Cruelty in the natural world comes out of necessity - not of enjoyment. When a wild predator tears apart its prey it does not do it for pleasure - it does not enjoy the killing; it does so because it needs to eat otherwise the predator itself would starve and die; plus wild animals do not have a concept of morality in the same way that humans do. This is different from bullies who hurt others just to make themselves feel better. It is not necessary or a product of survival, it is just sadism. Sadism is a perversion of nature not a part of it. Bullies and not strong people dominating the weak - they are broken, weak individuals themselves who attack other weak people.

The people that bullied me when I was younger were total scumbags - if you are from the UK you might call them "Chavs", or if you are from the USA "hoodlums". Pretty much all of them turned out to be horrible people when they grew up. One of the "tough" kids from my school was incarcerated sometime last year after him and a friend tried to kill a shop keeper with a machete. Another kid from my school, who was a bit of a bully, is now a registered sex offender after he asked a minor for nudes. In nature it is the organisms who are considered desirable that tend to be successful, but would you call those that I have mentioned "fit" or "desirable"?

I think human bullying is more a product of a dysfunctional society and bad socialization rather than just simple nature.

 

[Apathy79]

In Australia, it's pretty normal as kids and adults to rip on each other constantly, it's part of the culture.

I got accused of bullying long after I finished school by 2 different people, one of which I could barely even remember. It wasn't physical, it was teasing stuff. Most people were like that with me and I was like that with other kids - I never thought anything of it. But it's interesting to see how it can be interpreted as bullying by some and have a serious effect - one of those kids ultimately committed suicide in his late 20s.

I didn't know how to take that. I could rattle off 10 people who treated me like I treated him, some of them are still my closest friends. To me that was just having fun and ultimately helped build character - now nothing anyone says to me can really have any serious negative effect. But to him it was bullying and really hurt him, completely unbeknownst to me until years later.

It's a funny subject. I mean as far as overt physical bullying goes, I'm all for expulsion and fixing it immediately. As far as banter, teasing, etc., being interpreted as bullying by some but not others, it's a really hard line to draw. And in many of those cases, the "bully" doesn't even realise that's what he is to the "bullee".

 

[Journeytoletgo]

I disagree that bullying is always a part of nature, because there are a multitude of reasons for why someone would bully or abuse another person. Cruelty in the natural world comes out of necessity - not of enjoyment. When a wild predator tears apart its prey it does not do it for pleasure - it does not enjoy the killing; it does so because it needs to eat otherwise the predator itself would starve and die; plus wild animals do not have a concept of morality in the same way that humans do. This is different from bullies who hurt others just to make themselves feel better. It is not necessary or a product of survival, it is just sadism. Sadism is a perversion of nature not a part of it. Bullies and not strong people dominating the weak - they are broken, weak individuals themselves who attack other weak people.

The people that bullied me when I was younger were total scumbags - if you are from the UK you might call them "Chavs", or if you are from the USA "hoodlums". Pretty much all of them turned out to be horrible people when they grew up. One of the "tough" kids from my school was incarcerated sometime last year after him and a friend tried to kill a shop keeper with a machete. Another kid from my school, who was a bit of a bully, is now a registered sex offender after he asked a minor for nudes. In nature it is the organisms who are considered desirable that tend to be successful, but would you call those that I have mentioned "fit" or "desirable"?

I think human bullying is more a product of a dysfunctional society and bad socialization rather than just simple nature.

Agreed I don't think it's natural for human beings to behave as such. However more so a product of narcissism, dysfunctional society, and bad socialization.