Discussion Biggest Regrets in Life?

[peachesNpoison]

Since I don't have anyone in my life that is able to speak with me about these things without threatening me with a hospital stay, and since I think a suicide note is pointless for me, I figure I'll scream into the void here about what I wish I'd done differently.

- I allowed fear of and judgment from everyone else when I was young to convince me to push down my empathy and ignore my sensitivity. I wish I hadn't become such a jerk for such a long time.
- I didn't listen to my instincts about a thousand times about whether people were liars and other kinds of garbage. In turn, I didn't give the people who deserved it the love and respect that I should have.
- I automatically trusted counselors and therapists despite clear ethical abuses and waited too long to just walk away.
- I should have told my family to fuck off way sooner.
- I pushed away the only person I was ever in love with.
- I waited too long to decide to finally ctb, falsely hoping that things could get better or that I would ever be mentally well.

likely more to come...

Anyone else want to get it all out?

 

[Severen]

I don't believe in free will but it would have been nice if my ex girlfriend wasn't so cruel towards me.

 

[therhydler]

I left the love of my life for a brief fascination and lost her forever. I am a fucking moron

 

[MsM3talGamer]

Being born into this cruel world is my biggest regret.

 

[Severen]

Being born into this cruel world is my biggest regret.

Not like you had a choice. I'm going to stay in this nice and warm womb, thanks! *pushed out violently*

 

[MsM3talGamer]

Not like you had a choice. I'm going to stay in this nice and warm womb, thanks! *pushed out violently*

LOL. Even the womb carrying me was hostile. I was doomed from conception.

 

[Thoughtforms]

Letting life pass me by
Never planning longterm
Taking back a cheater

 

[Norest4thewicked]

Losing my 'one'. My second chance, never judged, alway there, understanding and a huge calming influence . I was such a prick. Pushed her away. I still don't know why.

 

[Severen]

Losing my 'one'. My second chance, never judged, alway there, understanding and a huge calming influence . I was such a prick. Pushed her away. I still don't know why.

It wasn't meant to last... What? You could have magically changed your personalty and lived happily ever after with her? The puppet asks why...but only the puppet master knows why...

 

[Smilla]

Not having separated from my family of origin at 17.

 

[peachesNpoison]

Not having separated from my family of origin at 17.

Was it involuntary or by choice?

 

[Smilla]

Was it involuntary or by choice?

I left and moved out but didn't emotionally separate and still stayed in close contact.

Had I known better I would have made a beeline for the west coast, never turning my head around.

 

[peachesNpoison]

- I wish I had been strong enough to ignore criticism and expressed myself artistically.

 

[Severen]

I left and moved out but didn't emotionally separate and still stayed in close contact.

Had I known better I would have made a beeline for the west coast, never turning my head around.

California?

 

[Sinbad]

Choosing this fucking doctor over another.
It's my fault so fuck me.

 

[peachesNpoison]

I left and moved out but didn't emotionally separate and still stayed in close contact.

Had I known better I would have made a beeline for the west coast, never turning my head around.

ah, I understand now. It's hard because there's such a societal pull and judgment on walking away from family. Some people can't fathom that it's sometimes the only right decision for some.

 

[Xaphous]

I've never lived so that's my regret. Just permanently isolated and housebound. Never even tried to get girlfriend, zero social life. Just a shell of a life. I really don't have any good experiences to look back on at all. On top of that losing all my money because I can't quit gambling.

 

[DisaffectedOne]

Pushing my wife away in a cowardly, manic state
Quitting my job in a cowardly, manic state

 

[NotWorthLiving]

Being born into this cruel world is my biggest regret.

Same. Or not having killed myself already...

 

[Buddyluv19]

- I allowed fear of and judgment from everyone else when I was young to convince me to push down my empathy and ignore my sensitivity. I wish I hadn't become such a jerk for such a long time.

All of this post resonates with me - especially the issue of 'pushing down empathy'.

If I had a dime for every time I was told "You're too sensitive", I could be retired on a beach somewhere! Of course, it was generally spoken by the Narcissist that was my primary care taker. Ironically, it was a good thing for her that I was empathetic- otherwise I would never have spent so much time trying to meet all of her 'emotional needs'.

So this brings up my greatest regret - NOT separating from my family sooner! Seems like a common issue.

 

[peachesNpoison]

If I had a dime for every time I was told "You're too sensitive", I could be retired on a beach somewhere! Of course, it was generally spoken by the Narcissist that was my primary care taker. Ironically, it was a good thing for her that I was empathetic- otherwise I would never have spent so much time trying to meet all of her 'emotional needs'.

It sets the likes of us up for a lot of codependency, that's for sure.

 

[Mr2005]

That's easy, not getting the surgeons numbers in 2004. I live with the consequences every day. The worse thing is it remains undone to this day and the only reason I don't do it is because I can't face hearing now what I wanted to hear then. I'd have to ctb there and then so I can't risk it until I have a way to do that. I've no excuses for not doing it years ago and I wrack my brain why.

 

[Xerxes]

Letting my close family jerk me around until I fell into hole of failure.

 

[Final Escape]

I've never lived so that's my regret. Just permanently isolated and housebound. Never even tried to get girlfriend, zero social life. Just a shell of a life. I really don't have any good experiences to look back on at all. On top of that losing all my money because I can't quit gambling.

Why did u become permanently isolated and housebound.

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

Not finishing things, especially college. Giving in to mental health problems too easily (although to be fair I never had adequate help with them). Not having enough routine or discipline in my day to day life. Giving in to stupid impulse shopping and being financially irresponsible. Eating an entire dump cake by myself last night (I was in the bathroom for hours).

 

[Final Escape]

My biggest regret is starting to work in a strip club at 19. It was pretty much downhill from there. I basically thought I could have a normal life doing that, but I was wrong. It caused problems in relationships, it was meaningless and empty. I ended up having a number of abortions as a result of being promiscuous, reckless, and bad partner choices. Now I'm older and I basically have nothing to look forward to as a result of bad decisions when young.

 

[Stillnotsure]

Being born ugly. All my life I was told the condom broke and I wasn't meant to happen. I was born 3 months premature so my eyes underdeveloped. I needed thick coke bottle glasses and even an eye patch. My hairs individual strands are oddly thick so I have unbelievably thick hair with gross frizzy waves and it can't be styled. The joke of having such thick hair? I have the biggest forehead you've ever seen. Looks like I've had a receding hairline since the age of 5. Parents, siblings, peers teased me relentlessly about my appearance. Biological mother was mentally very sick so she dressed us in old woman clothes from a young age, we only got to shop at the thrift stores. Now because of my illness, I'm as fat as a tick and can't lose the weight. I've watched pretty people skate through life. If only.....

 

[TheFriendlyGh0st]

I regret going to university. I was there for three years and had three rapists at varying times. One was my partner, who raped me on and off for a year and a half, including once on Christmas day. The stress caused me to develop bipolar, PTSD, an eating disorder, and chronic stress induced nausea. I've felt like I'm about to puke nonstop for the last three years and I haven't weighed more than 100 pounds since starting college. I started using drugs to cope because I have terrible nightmares about my rapists. I didn't even want to go. I hated my major. I wanted a gap year and then I wanted to ease into it by starting with the basics in community college but my parents basically made me do what they wanted. And the worst part? They paid $80,000 for me to flunk out at the end of my junior year. It's pretty much my only regret in life.

 

[Final Escape]

I regret going to university. I was there for three years and had three rapists at varying times. One was my partner, who raped me on and off for a year and a half, including once on Christmas day. The stress caused me to develop bipolar, PTSD, an eating disorder, and chronic stress induced nausea. I've felt like I'm about to puke nonstop for the last three years and I haven't weighed more than 100 pounds since starting college. I started using drugs to cope because I have terrible nightmares about my rapists. I didn't even want to go. I hated my major. I wanted a gap year and then I wanted to ease into it by starting with the basics in community college but my parents basically made me do what they wanted. And the worst part? They paid $80,000 for me to flunk out at the end of my junior year. It's pretty much my only regret in life.

Three rapists?

 

[Johnnythefox]

• Not leaving home sooner.
• Taking a job in a hospital instead of the one in the recording studio (YTS).
• Not having asked all those girls out.
• Not learning meditation when I was younger, like I was going to.
• Taking LSD.
• Not seeing my kids grow up.
• Too many to mention.