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ElTopo

ElTopo

Don't listen to me, I am drunk
Mar 30, 2025
192
As the title says I'm back and feeling the worse I've ever felt, it's a wonder I can drag myself to work. I've been drinking almost everyday now for a while, some older things bother me a lot, I still wish that God could allow me to die, but he won't kill me, he won't answer me. I know it sounds like crazy rambling but it's just how I feel, I just want to sit down in darkness and drink, drinking has always made me feel like my true self or something, more in touch with reality, more power over my thoughts, I know I'm spiraling into darkness and it makes sense that I am given the equation of my life, but I just wish I has someone near, a friend or something that would care enough to feel sad about me.
There isn't much more to tell, don't know if I'll be researching ctb methods or not since my preferred way would be something that looks natural enough. Something like inducing a heart failure or a workplace accident would do but since no instant heart attack pill has been invented yet I'll wait for a while, eventually the alcohol and cigarettes will get to me.
 
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Reactions: nocatwaslost and heywey
nocatwaslost

nocatwaslost

free hugs
Dec 7, 2024
32
I don't really know what to say, so I am just dropping you this song here, because I like it and it is soothing. Music helps me a lot of times.

 

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