Depends on your situation. But definitely after 30s its too late.
Don't believe the people trying to brainwash you with the "it's never too late" propaganda bullshit.
Those are either your friends who are never gonna be mean to you, or some con-artist life coach who wants you for your money.
Realistically, you need to be honest with yourself.
How will you feel if you are in your 30s and trying to "fix your career"? You gonna be happy going back to school knowing that you have to somehow come up with money to pay for rent and school? You gonna be happy knowing everyone is younger than you? You gonna be happy spending 4 years to get a degree then have to get a low paying entry level job again? What if that degree doesn't work out? You okay with money wasted?
You gonna try to fix your "relationship issues?" in your 30s? If you haven't successfully dated at this point, its because of some trauma you've experience that will stick with you for the rest of your life. It's not because "some relationships weren't meant to be". You gonna be happy knowing everyone is married and in a secure relationship while you are still dating? You're gonna spend time going from person to person only to realize once again that your trauma is the reason you can't be in a relationship. You are not only wasting your time, but other's time.
Then, there is the loneliness aspect. Who are you going to share these experiences with? As the old saying goes, "it means nothing if you have no one to share it with". Well? Who do you have to share it with? You don't have a family and wife. Your friends have moved on in their careers and (most) are probably not going back to school.
Even if by some miracle you do become "successful" and "fix" things. How late will that be? It takes truly a good decade to make any significant changes to the point that you have "fixed" things. So by the time you fix things in your 40s, you may be already too late to start a family. By the time you gained enough money, you may not have enough time or your health may have deterorated to the point that you can't enjoy anything that money has to offer.
It's pessimistic, but be real with yourself.
I completely agree because i have the same feelings.
But there is a but. There are still people outside who made mistakes even if not traumatized and developed trauma later:
- Ppl who were forced in a career because they did not have any idea/skill or for money reason or because they were forced by ignorant parents
- Ppl who were forced by environmental or family factors to get in a relationship at young age and chose the wrongest partner ever
- Other traumatized ppl, this does not mean they are losers or unappealing ppl, they are just unlucky
Of course if you want to have a great career as a soccer player or top model it is too late. And it maybe too late also in serious engineering or cooking or other stuff, but apart from some rare ppl, EVERYONE got some trauma before their 30s or made really huge mistakes...
Of course it depends on wich kind of trauma and If you have resources and also to the 'spawn point'.
And of course you are right saying that 'conventionally' there is a time for everything and If you miss chances, you will walk alone most of the times. But in my case i could not stand ppl in my depressive period, i knew they were having influence on me Both positive or negative, but I didn't want to be influenced, I'd rather die.
But trust me, there are a lot of depressed walking-dead ppl even if they have big smiles and shiny cars. I was one of them for a certain period. That was not my main source of trauma however.
Also, as a guy with CTPSD, you are right in the relationships aspect, it is difficult to stand someone who I think does not understand me, and that's my problem not their...but in many cases this shield I have saved me.
