Discussion are your parents divorced?

[salvation]

Mine are, I don't like it. I always felt different not having a complete family

 

[TAW122]

Mine aren't, but growing up, especially when I was young, they often fought against each other mostly verbal and sometimes physically. However, as I grown older, like teenager or so, they fought less and later just became tolerant of each other. I suppose there were times where the idea of divorce was an option on the table, and a few times it got close, but never happened. In present day, I'd say my parents are generally on good terms.

 

[AnnihilatedAnna]

Mine are, they divorced when I was five years old. My mom had cheated on my dad. To this day it is still a war between them.

If you think about it's pretty sad but now o can laugh about it when i was in elementary school and we had those little parent teacher conferences we always had to have two because they wouldn't be in the same room together.

 

[Begemont]

Yes, and thank fuck they are. Dad finally found a decent partner and I had a few decent years when I was able to finally move in with him and get away from mom.

 

[_milo]

Mother had divorced three times. Gave up on a father a long time ago.

 

[Final Escape]

Mine are, I don't like it. I always felt different not having a complete family

Yes they divorced when I was like 2 yrs old. My father was a pathological psychologically abusive man. So I'm glad my mother didn't stick around but wish she would have chosen better because I'm still living the consequences of growing up without the intact home.

 

[ithappens]

No, I was born out of wedlock and raised by a single mother. Not sure which is worse tbh.

 

[Final Escape]

No, I was born out of wedlock and raised by a single mother. Not sure which is worse tbh.

I know some people might disagree with me on this but in my opinion this is child abuse. Back in the day women were monitored to choose men well, plus there was no easy divorce, they made people work it out if there was marital problems at least in most situations where that's possible. If women got pregnant outside of marriage u had to give the kid up to a stable two parent home or your parents helped u raise it but u weren't rewarded with money off the backs of other taxpayers to be a single mother by the gubmint.

 

[ithappens]

I know some people might disagree with me on this but in my opinion this is child abuse. Back in the day women were monitored to choose men well, plus there was no easy divorce, they made people work it out if there was marital problems at least in most situations where that's possible. If women got pregnant outside of marriage u had to give the kid up to a stable two parent home or your parents helped u raise it but u weren't rewarded with money off the backs of other taxpayers to be a single mother by the gubmint.

My whole childhood was messed up, but a lot of the family dynamic even before I was born was broken. My mother made a big mistake getting pregnant as a teen, and she paid for it her whole life, but so did I. My father ran off, understandably intimidated by the burden of raising a kid when he was just barely graduating high school. Impulsive as she was my mother continually made poor decisions, landing herself in section 8 housing and choosing to take me with her when my guardians (my grandparents) offered to raise me in a stable home instead. Out of a mix of pride and I suppose possessiveness she refused and as mother was given custody by the courts. Living in that level of poverty, where she was trapped in a full time job that could only pay up to a certain amount or she'd be booted off the subsidized housing, her filling her free time with college, and scraping by on food stamps while other looked down on us led to stress for her, which led to child abuse on her end. Granted, the abuse I suffered wasn't nearly as bad as some other people I know have been through, but it haunts me to this day and taught me early on in life that suffering is largely what you'll experience.

So on a personal level I'd have to say I agree, I could have been raised in a much better and more stable home where I was supported and had an actual opportunity entering the world, but I wasn't because of how things are these days in the USA. However, I also know there are single moms out there who don't residually abuse their kids (though honestly in poor neighborhoods child abuse is a pretty regular occurrence and way of life, especially among struggling single parents, sorry to burst anyone's bubble), can't say I knew many though. I knew maybe one single mom who managed to maintain a decent job and household for her child and wasn't abusive, but she was divorced from the dad and had her child when she was older, plus she wound up going to the other extreme and spoiling her kid so much that she became entirely self-absorbed and basically lost a ton of friends and now has regular mental breakdowns on social media when she doesn't get tons of attention or likes on her post or if someone doesn't respond to a request to hang out, so IDK how successful that was either.