For some odd reason, I was only able to stomach that stuff when I was a kid. I think I just wasn't able to actually process what I was seeing. Maybe it's also because now I can kinda see myself in those videos?
Same-I was addicted to horror movies and morbid stuff as a kid, but I'd not had many traumatic things happen to me in my life at that point. I
think I actually wanted to be a pathologist as well. Since then I've lost family members and seen their deaths up close and I wanna be nowhere near it again if I can help it. I literally flinch if there is a dead body on the TV in some detective drama now, sometimes I have to leave the room. All that shit got real once I'd dealt with death in real life and now it's a bit triggering, even if it's just a horror movie.
I remember there was this guy back in school in my film class who had to leave the room when they put on this scary film because he couldn't watch horror movies and I thought he was such a wuss, but now 20 years later I'm the same because of real life experiences. I'd give anything to be as naive and blissfully ignorant as I used to be about death and how traumatic it can be.