unrest
Member
- Jun 3, 2023
- 73
to be honest this might just be a vent but? im currently living with my mother after moving out for a short period of time however life happens and im moving back in. i just lost my job and i go to college so its been hectic trying to think about saving money. one thing is, i cannot bear to live with her. without a doubt i have resentments about her for being neglectful and abusive quite literally ever since i was born. this resentment shows up all the time as annoyance, anger, confusion whenever im around her and shes so unbearable to be around and is my number one trigger. the thing about her is that she has such good moments where i think that "hmm, maybe she is doing better. i have a mom again that i can trust and rely on!" soon follows up with crossing my boundaries, manipulating, and taking advantage of me and its this whole cycle of damn i hate you, i love you, youre the best. i want to put myself in a better headspace and all ive been really doing is going to campus, shutting myself in my room while shes working, or just being outside doing my own thing but when shes here, i just cant? im not really sure if anyone here is in a similar situation but i dont really know any other ways to cope with her for the time being as this is only a temporary living situation.
