Are the users of this website different to the rest of the internet and if yes in which sense?

[noname223]

I think this question rather fits in suicide discussion because I ask it in the context of this website being a suicide forum.

I think there are different stances on this forum. Some see it as safe space for suicidal people. Not being judged when openly admitting suicidal thoughts etc. Some have changed their opinion and see this forum now more critically. Many say the nature of this forum had changed. Personally I did not notice major changes but I think I am often primarily in my own threads. And I am not really aware for changes. Maybe if I were longer on this website.
I think the recovery forum might have changed this forum a little bit. But I think for the positive. Cannot remember when it was implemented.

When I hear members talking about reddit I think this place is better for me. Never was there but many tell bad stories about it. Personally I dislike that gore is there permitted. This forum is more strict on that and it is less widespread. This is at least my impression.

Many people say the people on here are more compassionate and more sensitive to vulnerable people. In my experience I think this is true. It is one of my main reasons why I am in this forum and not in another.

I was in other forums. People talked pejoratively about me when I expressed suicidality. And my suicidal thoughts are daily a lot in my mind. I need to talk about them in order to cope. And this is the best place where I can do that compared to the ones which I were in. I think it is brazen that on other platforms it is prohibited to say "I want assisted suicide". Sorry this is just impertinent. People like me who suffer from chronic suicidal thoughts for like a decade cannot really repress these thoughts. For me it is way more unhealthy not to talk about them. The thoughts increase and I can cope less without this forum.

On facebook you get banned for talking about suicide. I recently told a story about a woman that was temporarily banned for talking about suicide on facebook and some of her friends said this increased her pain a lot. I can fully understand that. Being punished for expressing these thoughts is so cruel and absolutely counterproductive. She committed suicide soon afterwards.

In the media they claim people on here would get bullied into committing suicide. I did not really experience that. I think there might be some trolls but the majority is very friendly to me. I think suicide forums are a paradise for trolls. Because the people here are very vulnerable. It is difficult to filter them out because they can return with an alt-account. It is important if something/someone hurts oneself trying not to take it too serious. Here are many people with own existential problems. Sometimes they cannot control their emotions. But I have already seen many people who did threads like "I want to apologize for my misbehavior". And for me they seemed to be genuine. Some replied they did not even perceive them as rude.

I have made very bad experiences with talking about suicidality on other platforms. On Twitter there are way way more bullies than here. On other mental health forums talking about suicidality is very restricted. And I need to talk about them. because they are a huge part of my struggle. My experiences were: I was treated like I was insane. People told me it is my own fault. That I don't want to get better. I had the feeling some people who had better life quality gawked at my threads and left ignorant comments despite the fact they barely knew my struggle.

I think the users on here are compared to the places I was before way more understanding. Probably not perfect this place has some flaws. But I would miss this place and many of its users a lot if it went downhill. The people on here also have existential sorrows and suffer often immensely. I think severe suicidality and huge suffering is kind of a unique experience. And people get the pain more if they experienced it themselves. This is why I can relate to a lot of things I read on here.

 

[catflowers]

I think this question rather fits in suicide discussion because I ask it in the context of this website being a suicide forum.

I think there are different stances on this forum. Some see it as safe space for suicidal people. Not being judged when openly admitting suicidal thoughts etc. Some have changed their opinion and see this forum now more critically. Many say the nature of this forum had changed. Personally I did not notice major changes but I think I am often primarily in my own threads. And I am not really aware for changes. Maybe if I were longer on this website.
I think the recovery forum might have changed this forum a little bit. But I think for the positive. Cannot remember when it was implemented.

When I hear members talking about reddit I think this place is better for me. Never was there but many tell bad stories about it. Personally I dislike that gore is there permitted. This forum is more strict on that and it is less widespread. This is at least my impression.

Many people say the people on here are more compassionate and more sensitive to vulnerable people. In my experience I think this is true. It is one of my main reasons why I am in this forum and not in another.

I was in other forums. People talked pejoratively about me when I expressed suicidality. And my suicidal thoughts are daily a lot in my mind. I need to talk about them in order to cope. And this is the best place where I can do that compared to the ones which I were in. I think it is brazen that on other platforms it is prohibited to say "I want assisted suicide". Sorry this is just impertinent. People like me who suffer from chronic suicidal thoughts for like a decade cannot really repress these thoughts. For me it is way more unhealthy not to talk about them. The thoughts increase and I can cope less without this forum.

On facebook you get banned for talking about suicide. I recently told a story about a woman that was temporarily banned for talking about suicide on facebook and some of her friends said this increased her pain a lot. I can fully understand that. Being punished for expressing these thoughts is so cruel and absolutely counterproductive. She committed suicide soon afterwards.

In the media they claim people on here would get bullied into committing suicide. I did not really experience that. I think there might be some trolls but the majority is very friendly to me. I think suicide forums are a paradise for trolls. Because the people here are very vulnerable. It is difficult to filter them out because they can return with an alt-account. It is important if something/someone hurts oneself trying not to take it too serious. Here are many people with own existential problems. Sometimes they cannot control their emotions. But I have already seen many people who did threads like "I want to apologize for my misbehavior". And for me they seemed to be genuine. Some replied they did not even perceive them as rude.

I have made very bad experiences with talking about suicidality on other platforms. On Twitter there are way way more bullies than here. On other mental health forums talking about suicidality is very restricted. And I need to talk about them. because they are a huge part of my struggle. My experiences were: I was treated like I was insane. People told me it is my own fault. That I don't want to get better. I had the feeling some people who had better life quality gawked at my threads and left ignorant comments despite the fact they barely knew my struggle.

I think the users on here are compared to the places I was before way more understanding. Probably not perfect this place has some flaws. But I would miss this place and many of its users a lot if it went downhill. The people on here also have existential sorrows and suffer often immensely. I think severe suicidality and huge suffering is kind of a unique experience. And people get the pain more if they experieced it themselves. This is why I can relate to a lot of things I read on here.

Yes, mostly because everyone on here is going through it and most of us are one bad day away from fucking dying
i like to think that this forum is my last resort for talking to people

 

[exitsimulation]

I think this question rather fits in suicide discussion because I ask it in the context of this website being a suicide forum.

I think there are different stances on this forum. Some see it as safe space for suicidal people. Not being judged when openly admitting suicidal thoughts etc. Some have changed their opinion and see this forum now more critically. Many say the nature of this forum had changed. Personally I did not notice major changes but I think I am often primarily in my own threads. And I am not really aware for changes. Maybe if I were longer on this website.
I think the recovery forum might have changed this forum a little bit. But I think for the positive. Cannot remember when it was implemented.

When I hear members talking about reddit I think this place is better for me. Never was there but many tell bad stories about it. Personally I dislike that gore is there permitted. This forum is more strict on that and it is less widespread. This is at least my impression.

Many people say the people on here are more compassionate and more sensitive to vulnerable people. In my experience I think this is true. It is one of my main reasons why I am in this forum and not in another.

I was in other forums. People talked pejoratively about me when I expressed suicidality. And my suicidal thoughts are daily a lot in my mind. I need to talk about them in order to cope. And this is the best place where I can do that compared to the ones which I were in. I think it is brazen that on other platforms it is prohibited to say "I want assisted suicide". Sorry this is just impertinent. People like me who suffer from chronic suicidal thoughts for like a decade cannot really repress these thoughts. For me it is way more unhealthy not to talk about them. The thoughts increase and I can cope less without this forum.

On facebook you get banned for talking about suicide. I recently told a story about a woman that was temporarily banned for talking about suicide on facebook and some of her friends said this increased her pain a lot. I can fully understand that. Being punished for expressing these thoughts is so cruel and absolutely counterproductive. She committed suicide soon afterwards.

In the media they claim people on here would get bullied into committing suicide. I did not really experience that. I think there might be some trolls but the majority is very friendly to me. I think suicide forums are a paradise for trolls. Because the people here are very vulnerable. It is difficult to filter them out because they can return with an alt-account. It is important if something/someone hurts oneself trying not to take it too serious. Here are many people with own existential problems. Sometimes they cannot control their emotions. But I have already seen many people who did threads like "I want to apologize for my misbehavior". And for me they seemed to be genuine. Some replied they did not even perceive them as rude.

I have made very bad experiences with talking about suicidality on other platforms. On Twitter there are way way more bullies than here. On other mental health forums talking about suicidality is very restricted. And I need to talk about them. because they are a huge part of my struggle. My experiences were: I was treated like I was insane. People told me it is my own fault. That I don't want to get better. I had the feeling some people who had better life quality gawked at my threads and left ignorant comments despite the fact they barely knew my struggle.

I think the users on here are compared to the places I was before way more understanding. Probably not perfect this place has some flaws. But I would miss this place and many of its users a lot if it went downhill. The people on here also have existential sorrows and suffer often immensely. I think severe suicidality and huge suffering is kind of a unique experience. And people get the pain more if they experieced it themselves. This is why I can relate to a lot of things I read on here.

to -put it shortly ive met more empathetic kind people on here than any other site on the net ever, ive only been on here a week or 2 but ive encountered no toxicity at all whatsoever. i think this should have a deepweb mirror or taken off the clearnet completely though for our safety and the sites owners. 50 deaths linked to this site, it wont last much longer though i really hope it does. the legality of this site is questionable im amazed but pleasently suprised that it exists and i found it i hope it can be preserved on the DW.

 

[Nolife62]

Bringing it to the DW would make it harder for people who need this site to find it.
I believe more people are alive today because of this site. People have found roads to travel down that they didn't know before which has saved their lives. People have found they're not the only one to be suffering with a problem and has been able to learn how to deal with their illnesses and move forward.
Some people are still here because they find joy and happiness and found a purpose in life by helping others.
I think with out this site more people would have ctb.

 

[FuneralCry]

Only because many people seem to be pro choice and respecting of the right to die. Also, the majority of users on here only join for methods which is obviously different to those who use the internet as a way to pass time. Apart from that, no. The only thing that makes this website different from anywhere else on the internet is allowing open discussions on suicide related subjects and methods.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I'm actually really 'lucky' because this is the first forum I have joined. It's taken me decades to find it though... I hope it isn't moved to the dark web because I don't really want to mess around with that.

I totally agree with you. It's ironically become something of a lifeline to me. Somewhere to get a bit of social interaction without a whole load of pretence and small talk. I agree- the vast majority of people on here do seem genuine and compassionate people. It's just so sad we're all 'meeting' under these circumstances.

I think people have totally the wrong impression of this place if they think we are all urging one another on to do it- That shit definitely happens on the regular platforms. I find here there's (mostly) a supportive and healthy respect for where a person is in their thinking and choices. I'm so grateful for this place.

 

[SCW]

I've never received the number for the suicide hotline from a user here and that counts for something. I don't post often obviously but I've been lurking since joining.
The idea that someone cares that we don't fail is so important. Whether that be failing to ctb or failing at making it another day. Here, there's always someone to care and they really seem to try. This may be the most empathic corner of the internet I've ever seen.

 

[Hollowillow]

the people on here are more compassionate and more sensitive to vulnerable people.

This. And people seem more open & intelligen too. Deep wisdom & compassion. Maybe not me. I apologize for my bad behavior.

to -put it shortly ive met more empathetic kind people on here than any other site on the net ever, ive only been on here a week or 2 but ive encountered no toxicity at all whatsoever. i think this should have a deepweb mirror or taken off the clearnet completely though for our safety and the sites owners. 50 deaths linked to this site, it wont last much longer though i really hope it does. the legality of this site is questionable im amazed but pleasently suprised that it exists and i found it i hope it can be preserved on the DW.

I can't find deep web stuff.

I really wish the outsiders could understand that the people who killed themselves here:

* Came here because they were suicidal & needed support from people who feel the same

* Were not bullied into commiting suicide, because it's not a hobby site rejecting people. For people who want to die.

* People come here to die. Not to be convinced otherwise by having their feelings & opinions incaludated. With platitudes to make them feel wrong, stupid, believe fake hope, turn to religion, selfless slavery.

* People come here to die. Effectively without becoming crippled in an even worse hell, found & locked up, or to avoid painful processes.

* People come here to have companionship while they die.

* People can come here for solutions & recovery. But it can only happen if the choice to die is respected, forcing life hurts more. We can't recover if we can't even mention suicide without being told to only say happy things.

* Talking about suicide makes us feel happy. I felt close to a friend who understood my deepest darkness. The suicide memes made me laugh for the first time in ages, because I could relate instead to envy & feel inadequate. I can be me.

* We need information & answering our question about methods help us make wise decisions. I was warned of the risks. Being told not to say it would have made it easier to fantaizize that it's an easy way out.

* Suicide isn't a loss of control. It's one of many ways of taking control of our life. It's a choice. Impulsivity is discouraged because of sloppy failures. So our suicide is a well thought plan.

* I feel safer by thinking of suicide. Because I can't be abused or in pain if I'm dead. It's the ultimate escape to safety. We don't get joy either, but when the pain is unbearable, it's a relief to have options.

* Maybe no one wants to die. But some things are worse than death. We don't always get what we need, sometimes getting nothing is better than something painful...

* Sometimes there is a solution to save us, but we are too tired, lack ressources, denied help, or people force us in the wrong type of help (psychiatric) while getting in the way of getting the help we need (denied gealth care because of a wrong hypicondria label)

* Some reasons to die might seem less valid than others. But different factors play an influence. Someone with a support group might cope with more, while others exhaust themselves trying to please too many while neglecting their needs... Some reasons might be superficial but could be because the person were raised by family & society to believe they're worthless if they don't confirm to a narrow standard if beauty, never tasting love for who they are, their kind personality.

* We can joke around and not to take everything we say as an illegal threat. Venting with words helps relieve the pressure. Anger is a stage of grief, often hiding a crying heart.

* Sometimes the kindess way we can do for someone suicidal is wish them a peaceful death, validating them, their judgement, feelings, & decision.

* Life is precious but can be worse than death.

* If someone isn't ready to nurture a suicidal oerson into a healthy life situation, it's crueller to save them than let them find rest.

* Some people think that the only way they can rest is death. Society should encourage vacations instead of taking away means to escape abusive slavery with suicide. They sould encourage them to be selfish enough to take care of their vital needs, instead to call suicide selfish.

* Some want to suicide by shame (I do wish to do sepuku for ruining my life, home & health) shaming their choice pushes them further in suicide.

* I want to commit suicide because no one believe the abuse & neglect I've been through. Cops, doctors & the suicide hotline call me a liar... I almost rage hanged myself to flee their world.

* We want to live in your ideal world, but we live in the real one. We aren't negative. We are realists. We aren't mentally insane defective brains, I saw super intelligent people who endured torture by the true crazy people.

* It's not this site who push us to suicide, it's shaming our hurt feelings & not letting us discuss our reality & options...

* Death is an option...

* The world is overpopulated. We lack homes, have homeless, such competition the rent go too high for dirty places but people have no choice... We can't find jobs, ending up in shitty jobs even with a university degree. The food is artificial junk, they even started growing mutant sludge in labs. Many disabled people & elderly would like to volunteer to get out but are forced to stay, in abusive conditions, so people can make cash off them. Doctors save unviable babies just to brag about their success statistics. People cling to comatose loved ones because they can't face grief. We have no predators except each other. Put tortured souls out of their misery if they wish it.

* Maybe some people flirt with death as a coping mechanism with no true desire to die soon. This can be healthy. To feel like they're not trapped in hell if the agony becomes to extreme. Maybe it'd be better to downsize responsibilities to avoid stress, because getting all the dreams required energy & it's too limited. But it takes time, and a suicidal meme can provide immediate laugh until we figure out how to improve our life long term. It can give a bit more courage to have loved ones here who understand you, survived worse...

* Society is killing us with overwork, malnutrition (lack of vitamins, chemicals that cause even cancer), adding stuff to water, pollution, over production of trash for money (water bottles instead if fountains), psychiatric pills that don't solve the cause of the trauma but can cause side effects like depression, anxiety, psychosis & suicidal actions. But then they give us crap when we want to finish ourselves off.

* Suicidal people can be the sanest if all. There is little censorship here. Here we are free.
W

Yes, mostly because everyone on here is going through it and most of us are one bad day away from fucking dying
i like to think that this forum is my last resort for talking to people

Why a line on your name? Are you dead? Left? Not banned I hope?

 

[Sammie]

My experiences were: I was treated like I was insane. People told me it is my own fault. That I don't want to get better. I had the feeling some people who had better life quality gawked at my threads and left ignorant comments despite the fact they barely knew my struggle.

Yes, I agree with you. I haven't been here long, but have seen nothing but compassion for others, aside from a troll that was badgering a woman on her goodbye thread but who was banned later. It is helpful to read others' stories who we are able to empathize with, to vent, to get thoughts together and talk with others who understand...because without this it would be too easy to "spiral out of control," act on an impulse, or simply feel crazy which is not a nice headspace. And yes, this is something nobody could ever wrap their mind around to even try to understand if not been through it themselves. Before coming here, I already had too many unhealthy coping mechanisms for decades and this site is benign in comparison to those things. I can relate to your experiences, as I had been told in the past from a psychotherapist that I was clearly not ready to change (and therefore the place I felt trapped in was my fault) even though I sought her out on my own terms and have always been in therapy 100% voluntarily. Worse, the next therapist I saw (who the previous therapist referred me to) insinuated that a trauma that happened to me not long before I confided in her (which was extremely difficult to do) was my fault. Some people either will never be able to understand, are too narrow minded, are not qualified or conditioned to treat certain conditions or simply don't know how to help, and it is unfortunate that these people exist in the mental health arena which can only further traumatize. So with all this, I want to say I'm sorry you find this place comforting but also that I totally understand you and feel nothing but compassion. I come here with no judgement and expect not to be judged.