Anyone worried N won’t be peaceful

[Funeralprincess]

So I'm just curious for those who are also dying by N… are any of you worried it won't actually be peaceful, like maybe it's a "too good to be true" situation? I'm just wondering it anyone has ever had fears around that method. I sometimes worry about that (I've had attempts before that were VERY fucking painful) but perhaps it's just unnecessary anxiety I have, who knows. I'm currently trying to find a place where I could safely take it without getting caught, because a hotel doesn't really give me solid reassurance

 

[wljourney]

Yes, though I am mostly worried about the taste/aftertaste and my lack of sufficient amounts of antiemetics. I have a few, but not as much as recommended.

I think this worry about "failing" or dying to be painful is normal. It's natural. It's just another way of your brain's survival instinct to keep you alive.

What worries you about a hotel room? I think it's quite safe to go to a larger chain hotel. Check in before 3 pm, put the "do not disturb" card out and you'll be left alone at least until midmorning next day. That should be plenty of time and the larger the hotel, the less likely it is that anyone pays attention to you.

 

[freelifexit]

I saw two posts about failed N attempts, both described it as peaceful.
Also I saw two videos of euthanasia with powder N, it also seemed peaceful.

 

[Funeralprincess]

Yes, though I am mostly worried about the taste/aftertaste and my lack of sufficient amounts of antiemetics. I have a few, but not as much as recommended.

I think this worry about "failing" or dying to be painful is normal. It's natural. It's just another way of your brain's survival instinct to keep you alive.

What worries you about a hotel room? I think it's quite safe to go to a larger chain hotel. Check in before 3 pm, put the "do not disturb" card out and you'll be left alone at least until midmorning next day. That should be plenty of time and the larger the hotel, the less likely it is that anyone pays attention to you.

Hmmm I didn't think about that! A larger hotel may be better. Yes perhaps you're right that it's just the brain trying to survive still. I didn't realize you too were going by N. I always see your posts and most of them are pretty informative which is appreciated :) I lack an antiemetic too but am trying to get it because me in particular, I'm sensitive to vomiting in general due to having had eating disorders, so I really need it. How much is usually recommended? I've read like 30mg then others say 40mg but I think with the meto I have to routinely take it. I worry about the taste too, but I plan on having a piece of dark chocolate or two (I'm drinking two glasses of this stuff) and hopefully that helps a bit.

I saw two posts about failed N attempts, both described it as peaceful.
Also I saw two videos of euthanasia with powder N, it also seemed peaceful.

Ah yes I have seen those two. I'm just hoping mine does not fail haha because I need to go when I do it. I don't want to wake up in a hospital :/

 

[wljourney]

How much is usually recommended? I've read like 30mg then others say 40mg but I think with the meto I have to routinely take it. I worry about the taste too, but I plan on having a piece of dark chocolate or two (I'm drinking two glasses of this stuff) and hopefully that helps a bit.

If you read the PPeH it has two options - a stat dose (just one, an hour or so before you take N) and the other option is taking MCP a few times over 48 hrs I believe.

IMO anything will help and if it's not 30mg stat or 4 doses of 10mg each then you'll do with what you have. 5mg more or less won't make such a huge difference. There is always some leeway built into these recommendations. And none of them are a 100% guarantee. Nothing in life is. Or in death. So I'll just do the best I can.

 

[Funeralprincess]

If you read the PPeH it has two options - a stat dose (just one, an hour or so before you take N) and the other option is taking MCP a few times over 48 hrs I believe.

IMO anything will help and if it's not 30mg stat or 4 doses of 10mg each then you'll do with what you have. 5mg more or less won't make such a huge difference. There is always some leeway built into these recommendations. And none of them are a 100% guarantee. Nothing in life is. Or in death. So I'll just do the best I can.

I hope we both have a peaceful journey :)

 

[👁️👃👁️]

It's not my method but if it was no I would not be worried at all
There's a reason why so many people are trying to get their hands on this stuff
Sorry there's a reason why so many suicidal people are trying to get their hands on this stuff

 

[wljourney]

I hope we both have a peaceful journey :)

Yes, I am wishing you and everyone else the same. It's the one thing everyone deserves and only so few actually receive.

 

[Funeralprincess]

Yes, I am wishing you and everyone else the same. It's the one thing everyone deserves and only so few actually receive.

We all deserve peace. I don't believe anyone should die in pain especially if their life was already full of it

 

[LaVieEnRose]

Besides the foul taste I don't think there's any painful aspect. Since it's not an immediate death the most difficult part will be waiting to fall unconscious after you ingest it. You should probably try and steel yourself for that beforehand.

 

[WaitingForMyRide]

You basically feel drunk and benzo'd out, start to feel sleepy, pass out, become unconscious, and pass away. N is the holy grail of CTB'ing. You might still have some SI you're combating which is totally normal. I've had the pleasure of having N once and I know how it goes. Wishing you the best of luck and a peaceful journey. Planning out the hotel situation can be a pain in the ass.

 

[Funeralprincess]

You basically feel drunk and benzo'd out, start to feel sleepy, pass out, become unconscious, and pass away. N is the holy grail of CTB'ing. You might still have some SI you're combating which is totally normal. I've had the pleasure of having N once and I know how it goes. Wishing you the best of luck and a peaceful journey. Planning out the hotel situation can be a pain in the ass.

You've had N? Why did you survive if you don't mind me asking? We're you saved? And you felt no pain right?

 

[WaitingForMyRide]

I had N recreationally and slipped into a coma because I took too much. I wasn't trying to CTB. It was literally lights out and peaceful within about 20 to 30 minutes. Just like dosing off on some sleeping pills. All I remember was waking up in the hospital. And yes, I was found unconscious. No pain at all and this was YEARS ago when it was readily available.

 

[Littlewittlelight]

I

So I'm just curious for those who are also dying by N… are any of you worried it won't actually be peaceful, like maybe it's a "too good to be true" situation? I'm just wondering it anyone has ever had fears around that method. I sometimes worry about that (I've had attempts before that were VERY fucking painful) but perhaps it's just unnecessary anxiety I have, who knows. I'm currently trying to find a place where I could safely take it without getting caught, because a hotel doesn't really give me solid reassurance

Don't know as I don't even have N or get a hold of it but considering they used it in assisted suicides it shouldn't be it's not a speculation that I would say it's too good to be true it was genuine info so we can rely on it? I think it's the fear anyone would have questions about anything because it's now a big question your questions are reasonable. I understand why you asked I would be scared too if I was planning. I hope it dwindles.

You've had N? Why did you survive if you don't mind me asking? We're you saved? And you felt no pain right?

They said they were taken to hospital and maybe the does wasn't enough either as N is also used in surgery to sedate patients so it's like a drug if you take 0.5ml or less you would surely pass away but PPeH and sources have said about the dosage so I think they didn't have enough of it why would they if they used it for recreational purpose and know about the threats you wouldn't want it. I understand your concerns now noone wants it to fail.

You've had N? Why did you survive if you don't mind me asking? We're you saved? And you felt no pain right?

Atleast it is the most reliable one if you carry out everything thing properly so that's what someone can do? It is the best if they used it for assisted ones really. What can be a better example. I hope we all find peace in something whatever it is be it this or anything else.

 

[watchingthewheels]

So I'm just curious for those who are also dying by N… are any of you worried it won't actually be peaceful, like maybe it's a "too good to be true" situation? I'm just wondering it anyone has ever had fears around that method. I sometimes worry about that (I've had attempts before that were VERY fucking painful) but perhaps it's just unnecessary anxiety I have, who knows. I'm currently trying to find a place where I could safely take it without getting caught, because a hotel doesn't really give me solid reassurance

No, because I haven't bought into the fearmongering posts that repeatedly come up here.

 

[damaged_soul]

My main concern with N is just the horrible taste, as I failed my last suicide attempt due to taste. Other than that it's the ideal method. I guess one factor to consider could be that you'll still have to wait a bit to die, it won't be like jumping where you get to die instantly. Because of that, I'll be sure to have a playlist of songs and movies prepared to distract me. There are some movies I really really want to watch that I'm holding off on watching, in hopes that I can save them for N or SN. Hopefully I'll be so engaged watching the movies that I won't have any desire to call an ambulance.

 

[Looking4Answers]

Would you say N or SN is
1. More peaceful
2. More reliable
3. Easier to get

 

[eldiablo666]

My concern with N is that I wake up choking on my own vomit if I drink N that's say , 6 months old.

I know PN said something about 20 yrs and the official expiry is 2 years but I still can't calm down about this idea

 

[lifeisbutadream]

I had N recreationally and slipped into a coma because I took too much. I wasn't trying to CTB. It was literally lights out and peaceful within about 20 to 30 minutes. Just like dosing off on some sleeping pills. All I remember was waking up in the hospital. And yes, I was found unconscious. No pain at all and this was YEARS ago when it was readily available.

I once accidentally took powdered n - about 600 mg - and i had no experience with it so no tolerance - not enough to kill but an overdose. Lights out. Next thing I knew it was morning. Had I taken ten times as much i would have woken up in the next world.

 

[freelifexit]

I once accidentally took powdered n - about 600 mg - and i had no experience with it so no tolerance - not enough to kill but an overdose. Lights out. Next thing I knew it was morning. Had I taken ten times as much i would have woken up in the next world.

Where did you get powdered N?

 

[lifeisbutadream]

Where did you get powdered N?

China, years ago when it was still available.

When the Chinese seller, who went under the name "Johnson", took over from an earlier Chinese seller who called himself Selly Dong, he even posted on the forum equivalent to this one of the day, "Suicide Hideout".

There were legitimate sellers from China for a number of years, always only one at a time. Their product was tested and approved by PP. Why they stopped, what their connections were, we don't know.

 

[GasMonkey]

When the Chinese seller, who went under the name "Johnson"

I have that powdered N too (from Johnson), this was my result from the Lab:

 

[gottablast888]

My concern with N is that I wake up choking on my own vomit if I drink N that's say , 6 months old.

I know PN said something about 20 yrs and the official expiry is 2 years but I still can't calm down about this idea

Your thinking way too much

 

[lifeisbutadream]

I have that powdered N too (from Johnson), this was my result from the Lab:

View attachment 101972

Only 59%. What year was yours from? They say the quality of his n diminished a lot at the end. Earlier i believe it was tested at least 85 or 90% or even more. Still, 59% is good enough. I read that no one has been known to survive 6 grams of n, so if you take 11 or 12 grams it should be good, and all 25 grams he sent should be overkill. I tested about 1/2 gram on myself a couple of years ago, 500 or maybe even 600 mg. It ko'd me very pleasently, but i got seizures the next day. It was too much to experiment with, and really it was an accident. 100mg or maybe 200 was the normal sleeping pill dose back when it was still prescribed, and i had no tolerance to it. Mine is about 12 or more years old i think, and has been exposed to extremes of temperature, but i think it is still perfect. Thanks for the testing info.

Would you say N or SN is
1. More peaceful
2. More reliable
3. Easier to get

1. N more peaceful
2. Both seem reliable
3. N is unfortunately extremely difficult to get now

My concern with N is that I wake up choking on my own vomit if I drink N that's say , 6 months old.

I know PN said something about 20 yrs and the official expiry is 2 years but I still can't calm down about this idea

The bottled n should last for years if kept sealed. I don't know how many. I wouldn't be surprised if it was over 20. The powdered N should last many years if kept dry. Most medicines, and foods, last long beyond their expiration or best by dates. Probably if you found old n sleeping pills from the 1950s they'd still be fine.

 

[donewithyourview]

I feel there's very, very few deaths out there that are painless. Almost every form of death, whether suicide or not, is going to have some form of pain attached to it. I doubt N is the worst method out there.

 

[GasMonkey]

What year was yours from?

Late 2016.
Test done in late 2019.
Kept at ambient temperature, at that time I wasn't living alone so I couldn't have it in the freezer.

 

[lifeisbutadream]

Late 2016.
Test done in late 2019.
Kept at ambient temperature, at that time I wasn't living alone so I couldn't have it in the freezer.

I thought that PPH was testing his N and finding it to be much higher quality than 59% back in 2016. I need to see if I can check when i got mine. It was a few years earlier.

 

[makethepainstop]

So I'm just curious for those who are also dying by N… are any of you worried it won't actually be peaceful, like maybe it's a "too good to be true" situation? I'm just wondering it anyone has ever had fears around that method. I sometimes worry about that (I've had attempts before that were VERY fucking painful) but perhaps it's just unnecessary anxiety I have, who knows. I'm currently trying to find a place where I could safely take it without getting caught, because a hotel doesn't really give me solid reassurance

If I could get my hands on a sufficient quantity I'd be glad to let you know.

 

[Malcolm Yarfa]

Sometimes it makes me worry because one of my plans is doing the trip to South America and die there, buying the bottle and that's it getting it done in the local Hotel. So if it's not as peaceful as I thought it will be very disappointing.

 

[eldiablo666]

Your thinking way too much

I know. It's one of my biggest problems