thouxan

thouxan

Member
Mar 16, 2023
73
This world is horrible in so many ways. So much suffering. I would know, I am ugly, gay, I have autism, ocd, anxiety and possibly even more disorders that I can't be bothered to research and diagnose myself with. My entire life has been a constant suffering, my brain simply works differently from other people, I could never truly fit in and experience the things others did.

The only thing I kinda feel sad about nowadays as I lay alone in my bed is how different, how much better my life would have been if I was dealt better cards from the beginning. I was doomed to suffer no matter what because of my genetics and the way my brain was wired. But if I was good looking, with a normal and healthy mind, I would have so much potential. I don't even mind being gay, I have completely accepted it at this point and it's not bad at all compared to everything else that is wrong with me.

I am just imagining how easy everything would be if I was an attractive, mentally healthy and social person. I would have absolutely no trouble finding friends or romantic partners, they would come to me without having to try. I would be able to go out, do fun things and spend time with people that I like whenever I wanted, instead of being shut in my room. I would be able to enjoy hobbies and have something to work towards. I would be able to have casual sex or enter a relationship whenever I wanted. I would be able to enjoy my youth to the fullest and create beautiful memories that would fuel me for the rest of my life, even as I started to age and walked closer to death. People other than my family would actually care about me.

Even the happiest people with the best lives still experience some hardships of course. They deal with heartbreak, rejection, betrayal, losing loved ones, failing at their goals, becoming sick etc. But if your life is otherwise enjoyable, all of that shit is so much easier to deal with. I truly believe that despite all the suffering in this life, life is still worth it unless you are very unfortunate with the cards you were dealt like me and everyone else on this forum.

Imagine being in the position of a pro-lifer, whose life has been completely normal, without any hardships like the ones we experience. Of course you won't understand why people are truly suicidal, unless you have been in this insanely desperate position yourself. I am not talking about people who become suicidal after a breakup, losing money or the death of a loved one. I am talking TRULY suicidal, people like us who have desperately tried everything to cling onto life even though there was never hope to begin with.

So yeah, obviously no one knows what happens after death, this whole existence thing is so trippy and I don't even know if this is all a dream. But I wish I could just reincarnate into the body of a baby who grows up to be the average hot guy of the school. If I was in that position, obviously I would love my life and I would consider suicidal people completely delusional and insane, and that they can be saved lol. It's so unfair how differently you are treated by society based on things you can't control.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
  • Love
  • Hugs
Reactions: GasMonkey, artificialcoward, itsjustm3 and 4 others
E

EndlessX

Member
Feb 1, 2023
20
Nope!! but I don't think we can do much about it which frigging sucks
 
  • Like
Reactions: Homo erectus
gh0sttx

gh0sttx

such a pretty house // such a pretty garden
Mar 11, 2023
14
i feel exactly the same. i used to fantasize about how better my life would be i was attractive, lived in a better country, didn't have so many flaws. but in this life i got really unlucky haha.
 
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: thouxan and Homo erectus
Darkover

Darkover

Angelic
Jul 29, 2021
4,739
if reincarnation is true chances are you'll be born poor with a 1 in 4 chance you'll be living on less than 3.50usd per day 1 in 6 chances you'll have a disability within your lifetime, with a 1 in 3 chance you will go hungry each day, with odds like these who would take a chance on life on this shithole hellhole earth
 
  • Like
Reactions: HopelessSoul, Homo erectus and Scacie
thouxan

thouxan

Member
Mar 16, 2023
73
if reincarnation is true chances are you'll be born poor with a 1 in 4 chance you'll be living on less than 3.50usd per day 1 in 6 chances you'll have a disability within your lifetime, with a 1 in 3 chance you will go hungry each day, with odds like these who would take a chance on life on this shithole hellhole earth
Completely agree. But there are millions of people who never experience any of that, they have everything handed to them and suicide never even crosses their minds. Life would truly be worth it and as beautiful as they say, if you were one of them.
 
  • Like
Reactions: gh0sttx
W

Wowser

Member
Mar 7, 2023
77
Only if I get a preview of my new life and I get to choose if I want to live it.
 
  • Like
Reactions: GasMonkey, thouxan and Homo erectus
GasMonkey

GasMonkey

Nitrogen Master Race
May 15, 2022
1,881
As an almost 40yo KHHV i can totally relate.

About reincarnation, it depends on what can be done in the Other Side. Definitely there is no fucking way I'm coming back to this shithole in a random body, that's for sure. I can't risk ending up as another short bald fat unattractive bespectacled weird creepy awkward virgin.

It could be interesting to come back as a GigaChad, extremely good looking, tall, dark, handsome, full head of air, naturally athletic, naturally low bodyfat, optimal health, 10/10 face, 10/10 body, good family, etc. Could be feasible if you can pick your parents, by doing an extremely exhaustive study of their genetic quality and environment before inserting your consciousness into the fetus.​
 
Last edited:
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: plumhellgrade, itsjustm3 and thouxan
thouxan

thouxan

Member
Mar 16, 2023
73
It could be interesting to come back as a GigaChad, extremely good looking, tall, dark, handsome, full head of air, naturally athletic, naturally low bodyfat, optimal health, 10/10 face, 10/10 body, good family, etc. Could be feasible if you can pick your parents, by doing an extremely exhaustive study of their genetic quality and environment before inserting your consciousness into the fetus.
That would be the dream. Life would be great if you had good genetics like that. And I think it would still be worth it even if everything wasn't as perfect as you say. Even if you had an 8/10 face, an 8/10 body, average height, non-ideal family, you would still be in a greater position than most of the population and you would be able to overcome whatever hardship.
 
  • Like
Reactions: GasMonkey
m1v

m1v

Eternal flower fields
Feb 27, 2023
129
There's no way in hell that reincarnation would make me happy. Even if I had all the things I wanted in the world, you would still feel emotions like sadness, and you would still feel pain physically and mentally. By saying that, it's showing how weak I am, but in reality I just want to avoid anything that's going to hurt or harm me.

Life is not worth it, there's too much downsides for it to be worthy.
 

Similar threads

N
Replies
12
Views
309
Offtopic
EvisceratedJester
EvisceratedJester
N
Replies
2
Views
225
Suicide Discussion
TAW122
TAW122
ijustwishtodie
Replies
2
Views
180
Suicide Discussion
Alexei_Kirillov
Alexei_Kirillov
voidreverse1982
Replies
8
Views
446
Suicide Discussion
cammanozima
C