C
cappuccinogirl
Experienced
- Aug 11, 2018
- 246
Anyone feel right on the edge right now. Desperately trying not to chicken out xx
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I dont understandAll I want is everyday monotany. See? It's the most personal decision possible.
I dont think you would want to trade whatever yours with mine. It really sucks from my pov"This life is a hospital where every patient is possessed with the desire to change beds; one man would like to suffer in front of the stove, and another believes that he would recover his health beside the window."
― Charles Baudelaire, On Wine and Hashish
Not sure if that's what you were getting at here.
Thanks. Sounds like usa police! Just the process of doing it, fear of pills, stupid cowardice. So wish could die in sleep. Best wishes to you XI feel the push every day and night. I got arrested during my last psychotic episode while filming the police (got assault on a police officer charges even though I was just trying to keep him off me when he knocked me down and dove on top of me) and my life will never be the same. I overthink ctb every single day while I wait for the court date and a likely jail/prison sentence.
What do you feel like makes you hold back? For me it's somehow the idea that I can make it through this, we have only one life to live, etc.
Hi of course it's everybodys own decision. Didn't suggest otherwise as far as I know.Make the decision for yourself, it's your [NON-EXISTENCE], something incomprehensible.
I've committed to doing it soon, but my situation is my own, just like yours. Why would anyone follow my suit, or yours, or anyone elses?
Thanks. I hope you find whats right for you. What do you find stops you? XxI am with you there. I got all I need and ready to go and really disheartened from going back again to deal with everyday monotony. I hope that i will make it happen.
N is your guaranteeI am ready, I have tied up most loose ends (no pun intended) but I'm still not sure on my method. I kinda chickened out of the night night method when I tried it. My decision to CTB is firm but I need a guaranteed way to do it
I'm so sorry to hear that. Sounds terrible.Well, I had a pretty serious attempt a month ago that ended up with me being intubated and getting my stomach pumped. So with that being said I feel like laying low for a while with the suicide idea. I'm definitely going to go through with suicide but probably in a couple of months. Sometime in October.
For me it's my family and my chance of surviving.I feel the push every day and night. I got arrested during my last psychotic episode while filming the police (got assault on a police officer charges even though I was just trying to keep him off me when he knocked me down and dove on top of me) and my life will never be the same. I overthink ctb every single day while I wait for the court date and a likely jail/prison sentence.
What do you feel like makes you hold back? For me it's somehow the idea that I can make it through this, we have only one life to live, etc.
Sorry. What sort of help are you hoping for? XYeah but need help doing so badly
Sorry to hear that. How did you get n? Maybe pm me. Thanks xThere's a constant intense internal debate, having N slows it down a lot though, but still, right on the edge of it.