darkhorse256

darkhorse256

Student
Mar 10, 2020
112
My boyfriend. Pretty much the only thing holding me back.
 
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astro

astro

recovery gang
Dec 19, 2019
89
for me it's hope that things will get better. My 'issue' is that outside of mental illness everything in my life is/was great. That's a pretty uncommon situation I think and also the reason why it's hard for me to ctb. Other people always have multiple issues that cause them to want to ctb it seems so even if there is hope for 1 or 2 problems to go away, they'd still be suffering. I hope, however, that if I spend enough time researching my illness that I will come to the conclusion that things can't really get better anymore.
 
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Isittimetogonola

Isittimetogonola

Kindness is a weakness to be taken advantage by al
Oct 22, 2019
198
My best friend who will be going through a bitter divorce out of a narcissistic verbally abusive marriage said sometimes she just needs to be alone. I am proud of her to be at this stage. My dad is about to enter a nursing home. These were the last 2 things left. As I have been recovering from surgery, only 1 or 2 people I called family have checked on me. Today, I will finish all my letters and see where the days may fall. I am just too tired from feeling like a burden and an afterthought that never comes. I reach out but never feel it in return. This has been me my entire life. I cant help but give everything and especially in todays world, nothing feels like it is coming back. People say they value and love me but do they really..sorry for the vent. So actually in answer, really nothing left.
 
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Donk

Donk

Useless since day 1
Jan 3, 2020
1,129
My best friend who will be going through a bitter divorce out of a narcissistic verbally abusive marriage said sometimes she just needs to be alone. I am proud of her to be at this stage. My dad is about to enter a nursing home. These were the last 2 things left. As I have been recovering from surgery, only 1 or 2 people I called family have checked on me. Today, I will finish all my letters and see where the days may fall. I am just too tired from feeling like a burden and an afterthought that never comes. I reach out but never feel it in return. This has been me my entire life. I cant help but give everything and especially in todays world, nothing feels like it is coming back. People say they value and love me but do they really..sorry for the vent. So actually in answer, really nothing left.

no need to apologize for venting. for what its worth this community value you and love you.
 
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Isittimetogonola

Isittimetogonola

Kindness is a weakness to be taken advantage by al
Oct 22, 2019
198
no need to apologize for venting. for what its worth this community value you and love you.
Thank you. Those simple words mean so much right now.❤❤
 
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Soulless_Angel

Soulless_Angel

existence is futile
Jul 10, 2019
2,225
I'm afraid of failing and ending up in the hospital/psych ward.


pretty much this, as well as knowing if I failed, after a stupid psych ward visit, I would have no home to go too...
 
ECTatertot

ECTatertot

Member
Mar 4, 2020
9
Basically my mom and my sister; I know how much my death will hurt them. Also I still have a sort of fear of what is on the other side. I'm not religious any more, but I was raised in Christianity, so there's still that fear of hell (and of heaven, tbh). And then, of course, there's good ole SI that usually has me backing out of an attempt.
 
A

AcornUnderground

Mage
Feb 28, 2020
505
IF I found N . I will go for it . The only reason that I don't try other methods is I don't want to suffer
N from A is still reliable at least was for me in US
 
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nightnight

nightnight

New Member
Mar 14, 2020
4
I'm afraid no one will care for my dog. She loves me so much. I'm thinking about a scheduled text message to someone to come get her.
 
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