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_Kaira_

_Kaira_

This Isn't Fine
Oct 2, 2020
826
Yes and no. Tough to say. On one side, I left an abusive household. Was it as glamorous as I thought it would be? Not at all. I'm happy I'm away from that environment, but the damage that was caused in the long term has and always will have a lasting impact I fear...

Plus I'm not in a much better situation as it is now either.
 
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KuriGohan&Kamehameha

KuriGohan&Kamehameha

想死不能 - 想活不能
Nov 23, 2020
1,458
I never had parents, but adulthood is just as isolating and drab as I expected it to be. I've only been in "adult world" for 3 years now and it made me realise how cutthroat and horrible life can be. It makes me wish I had people in my life that I could go to for comfort. Being thrust out at 18 years old with multiple disabilities and no support is a special kind of hell. I understand how you're feeling about being anxious, losing the anchor of loved ones and familiarity is something to be sorrowful about. The way we live nowadays, as individuals and not as communities is unnatural, and we can only mourn for the sense of comfort we felt in childhood, because society places emphasis on making sure children have homes, often not stable homes and families, but a dwelling and people to socialise with, nonetheless. If an adult dies on the streets, starving and homeless, no one bats an eye or starts saying one should have pulled their bootstraps a bit harder.
 
Gnip

Gnip

Bill the Cat
Oct 10, 2020
621
Unfortunately, my parents are a package deal, my sane, kind, nurturing and intelligent mother, and my evil, stupid, selfish bullying and parasitical tyrant of a brain diseased father. My choice was to either abandon her to a violent death at his hands in a homicidal blackout rage, or continue to absorb the slings and arrows he purposely and systematically destroyed my life with from birth to shield her from his pathological and psychologist supported abuse..

Being Catholic, my mother simply was never going to divorce my atheist father. (They did come very close to a divorce in June 1987. If my mother and I had left him to go live with her father, my old man would be long dead by now. If we had left him, he would have instantly ceased to exist for me forever.)

Since my father had already destroyed my life, I maintained my relationship with my mother. My three siblings do not have a conscience, just as my father does not have a conscience. But I do have a conscience, perhaps instilled in me by my mother, and our consciences were ruthlessly exploited by my evil father.

If my father dies first, I will instantly experience the exquisite flood of relief I felt when his bitch/cunt old bat of a mother croaked. But if something happens to my mother first, I will CTB before she ever has a chance to be interred, or even placed in a coffin.
Nope. My parents fucked me up, and continue to fuck me up. I feel much better living on my own.

Living on my own, I continually worried about my mother's safety, although I was relieved to be away from my father. Once their nest was empty and it was just the two of them, he immediately turned his vicious and noxious wrath which had always been directed towards me against her, and that is when the most savage and violent confrontations ever between them took place, not over me like my siblings always wanted to hold me accountable for, but towards her as a stand in for his previous and subsequent abuse of me.

During that interval while I was living on my own, my mother broke her leg and my two younger twin brothers and my father treated her like worthless garbage. I returned to take care of her and serve her needs until she could walk again.

My father has always called his wedding vow to care for my mother for better or poorer, in sickness and in health, "Bullshit!," while chauvinistically expecting to be waited on and catered to his every whim.


What my old man has always been is his exact opposite definition of a "man." He has never kept a promise, been consistently indecisive, stabbed his wife and children in the back while boasting of his countless treasons, and so to me, "man" has always been a three letter word spelled "P-O-S!" Do not EVER call me a "man." That is the most derogatory insult and slur which can be directed towards me. (Complete strangers seem to sense this. "Guy," "buddy," "pal," "dude," "young man," "boy," "kid," and other alternatives are used towards me and about me, but never "man" itself. I do not mind at all being called a cocksucker, asshole, cunt, or other terms of endearment my old man never subjected me to.)
 
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lotus11

lotus11

Experienced
May 18, 2019
296
no the opposite, i moved to another country, feel so much better
 
Weary Soul

Weary Soul

Soon I will be free
Nov 13, 2019
1,158
My quality of life got so much better when I moved out. I was no longer an easy punching bag for their pain.
 
R

RepressedMind

Miss the full ability to think
Apr 24, 2020
160
For a while things were going good and I felt like my mentality was better, however slowly and slowly my mentality started deteriorating until I had mental breakdowns. Now I'm back with my parents and I feel so much better.
 
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