Anyone else not care about the effect it will have on family, etc?

[Ambivalent1]

It hasn't even occurred to me how others would feel possibly for the rest of their lives. At least that's one less barrier to deal with.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I used to only care a little bit about how my mom would feel…but only enough for me to delay it back in 2022. That year her father died of natural causes and I didn't want that year to be the one where she lost both her father and son in the same year. Unfortunately for her, it's already been two years since then and nothing she or almost anyone else can do can stop me.

My sisters also both depend on me to some extent but I don't actually care about how they'd feel. One of them literally does not have the mental capacity to comprehend suicide (she has severe autism) and the other has shown her true colors by proving she cares more about herself than about me.

 

[Ambivalent1]

I used to only care a little bit about how my mom would feel…but only enough for me to delay it back in 2022. That year her father died of natural causes and I didn't want that year to be the one where she lost both her father and son in the same year. Unfortunately for her, it's already been two years since then and nothing she or almost anyone else can do can stop me.

My sisters also both depend on me to some extent but I don't actually care about how they'd feel. One of them literally does not have the mental capacity to comprehend suicide (she has severe autism) and the other has shown her true colors by proving she cares more about herself than about me.

Yeah, the knowledge that everyone wears a mask and the real them only peeks through every now and again makes life less desirable. How can anyone want to live knowing that you'll never really know anyone except for what they choose to show you?

 

[v0id]

they'll move on with their lives. maybe sad for a couple of months, but will be fine nonetheless. having said that, i don't know why i haven't killed myself yet.

 

[Ambivalent1]

they'll move on with their lives. maybe sad for a couple of months, but will be fine nonetheless. having said that, i don't know why i haven't killed myself yet.

Some people such as parents are devastated for life.

 

[vak]

I'm sure my little brother will be conflicted after he'll realize he's getting my gaming rig with RTX4090. Mourning be gone!

 

[v0id]

Some people such as parents are devastated for life.

i don't think mine will be. they're one of the reasons why i want to ctb and once i actually die, they'll probably wash their hands out of it. they'll talk as if i'm just another fucked in the head child, and that there is nothing wrong with their parenting. my mother is obsessed with her public image; trust me, they'll care more about what others would say as the parents of an "insane" child rather than actually caring about my death.

also, i didn't really think of them when i wrote that comment. i thought about my friends. they'd actually care more. maybe feel guilty for some months, and that's it.

 

[Silent Raindrops]

I may of had thoughts about how family would react years ago, but now, none. I just don't have the thought capacity to care anymore. Whether I'm here or I'm gone, the earth will continue to spin.

 

[LaVieEnRose]

I find it very regrettable but it doesn't give me any pause whatsoever. I guess it wouldn't be too unfair to say then that I don't care if you get down to it. What especially sucks is that those who should feel about it, who contributed to it, won't feel bad.

 

[FutureHanger]

my failed attempt has really shown me I low-key underestimated how much it'd hurt them but no I don't care especially since they'd prob hate me anyways if they knew about me not being straight and me being atheist

 

[ctbcat]

i acknowledge it, and all, but yeah, i don't really care either. grief is inevitable. i feel no desire to try and prevent inevitable things from happening.

 

[LifeTransit_1]

I seriously would not give a rats shit about what my family would think about me CTBing... Their all terrible people who are ignorant and disrespectful.

 

[FutureHanger]

i feel no desire to try and prevent inevitable things from happening.

good point

 

[LifeTransit_1]

I seriously would not give a rats shit about what my family would think about me CTBing... Their all terrible people who are ignorant and disrespectful.

Though in my defense I do have some people that do care about me. Mostly friends that I have known for years.

 

[Life_and_Death]

Some people such as parents are devastated for life.

its been almost a year (may 13th....), im still crying about my cat...but she was also the best relationship ive had. she was my baby girl, my therapy pet, the closest i had to a mom... yeah, not everyone just gets over it. it depends on the individual and their relationship with the being that passed away..

thankfully for me, i dont have family. i only have to worry about my bf who is very away of my situation so....i dont have much of a reason to care about others...

 

[Ambivalent1]

its been almost a year (may 13th....), im still crying about my cat...but she was also the best relationship ive had. she was my baby girl, my therapy pet, the closest i had to a mom... yeah, not everyone just gets over it. it depends on the individual and their relationship with the being that passed away..

thankfully for me, i dont have family. i only have to worry about my bf who is very away of my situation so....i dont have much of a reason to care about others...

Caring about others isnt masculine. I can't step into that realm.

 

[Unknown21]

It's not as if i don't care about the impact of my suicide on my family, but really I don't have a choice , not to mention that some of my family members (my father and mother) are responsible in one way or another for that as well. I don't believe that death or suicide Someone like me would have a huge impact if he left this world. All the people I know (and that's just my family, of course) will be affected for some time and then they will get over that event and move on with their lives. I'm not a big loss to anyone anyway

 

[FuneralCry]

Nothing can matter to those who no longer exist as they are eternally unaware with all finally forgotten about. The fact that nobody can suffer from not existing is exactly why it appeals to me, I envy those who die as they have no more worries or concerns. Eventually for most people it'll be like they never existed at all, they'll just be forgotten about as they won't even exist in the memories of those who continue to stay here, we all have to die anyway and if I was dead of course I wouldn't be able to care about anything.

 

[Ambivalent1]

Nothing can matter to those who no longer exist as they are eternally unaware with all finally forgotten about. The fact that nobody can suffer from not existing is exactly why it appeals to me, I envy those who die as they have no more worries or concerns. Eventually for most people it'll be like they never existed at all, they'll just be forgotten about as they won't even exist in the memories of those who continue to stay here, we all have to die anyway and if I was dead of course I wouldn't be able to care about anything.

Your posts tend to be very similar, but they have a meditative quality to them like falling into a trance.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Caring about others isnt masculine. I can't step into that realm.

I wouldn't say it was 'masculine' to not care about others. Some of the toughest guys I know are the most compassionate, kind and caring. I guess that's the classic ideology though. Masculinity with aggression. Femininity with compassion.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I think that I care deep down but not enough so to where it would stop me

 

[walkingdead2023]

Maybe that's why I also didn't run into the traffic.. I love my parents they made sure I have everything but they don't understand that money is not everything.. being so unhappy and mentally ill doesn't decrimate even if you have everything but depressed you will be miserable… so yes I do care about my parents feelings when they find out but it won't prevent me from kms I'm doing it regardless

 

[matt1968]

I did worry about a lot of people - I think it's natural as things get worse that that group of people dimishes.

So I'm down to my partner, who really has been so supportive and tried to understand. It can't have been easy for him. He got a bad winter bug that took ages to shift and you could see the exhaustion and stress come out (he works and has been doing so much for me the last 18 months).

I try and say if something happens it's not to do with him, that there is something missing in me and these times.

 

[Andrew10]

It hasn't even occurred to me how others would feel possibly for the rest of their lives. At least that's one less barrier to deal with.

My father is a selfish manipulative narcissistic piece of shit I have too many words to express how horrible he is, I don't know where to start but he is and will always be the person I detest the most in this existence, personally I consider my life a simple weapon capable of leaving him with a permanent psychological wound and that instead of caring or not caring, it fills me with happiness I am aware that he "loves" me and it really gives me satisfaction to know that I can hurt him if he loses me.


I don't care about the feelings or the impact that I may leave on some people, maybe the only one that will affect me is my little brother but I know very well that he will continue moving forward and will enjoy his life so before catching the bus I will leave a note to my father telling him the worst thing he could imagine and telling him to learn to be a good father and not make the same mistake.

Hell, if I had had access to weapons and there was a possibility that my little brother would not be home for the short time necessary so that he would not see my body, I would blow my head off with a shotgun in front of my father, telling him the worst things he could imagine while I vent about all the terrible hell he put me through before doing it while I laugh but unfortunately this idea cannot be possible because my little brother may be present at the event.


I know him perfectly and I know that this will leave him traumatized or it will be unexpected, maybe he will call me a coward or pathetic but up to this point I let him call me or consider whatever he wants, the words of someone who has no value in me are insignificant. After all, I will be the one who wins and has the peace I want anyway. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

 

[F@#$]

I wouldn't say I don't care. I intend to cause as much trauma as possible.

 

[Ambivalent1]

I wouldn't say I don't care. I intend to cause as much trauma as possible.

Lol how come?

 

[babybunny13]

I care but my pain and suffering has gone on for too long.

 

[cold_severance]

i wish they would suffer because of it, but they wont ofc.

 

[greebo6]

No...or at least not really enough.

 

[Life_and_Death]

Caring about others isnt masculine. I can't step into that realm.

and fearing what others think about you is masculine?