• Hey Guest,

    We wanted to share a quick update with the community.

    Our public expense ledger is now live, allowing anyone to see how donations are used to support the ongoing operation of the site.

    👉 View the ledger here

    Over the past year, increased regulatory pressure in multiple regions like UK OFCOM and Australia's eSafety has led to higher operational costs, including infrastructure, security, and the need to work with more specialized service providers to keep the site online and stable.

    If you value the community and would like to help support its continued operation, donations are greatly appreciated. If you wish to donate via Bank Transfer or other options, please open a ticket.

    Donate via cryptocurrency:

    Bitcoin (BTC):
    Ethereum (ETH):
    Monero (XMR):
xXiloveyouXx

xXiloveyouXx

"was" is the saddest word of all
Jul 27, 2024
31
To put it simply, I received news on the phone yesterday. What I want is impossible, it can never be, no matter what words I say or what I actions I take, my squirming and kicking and fighting life is a bunch of sound and fury that signifies nothing. Fighting something impossible to overcome is as pointless as fighting against the inevitability of death. Why should I fight when I know for a certainty that I can never have what I want out of life?

This is why I feel so at peace right now, at peace with the entire world and my place in it, because I finally have a certainty to stand on. Nothing has been certain for me for so long. This terrible news is objective. It's now the ground and the boundaries of my world. So I'm not very afraid of anything all of a sudden. I'm not afraid of death. It's better to gently accept it since it's coming for all of us in the end anyway, and there's peace in inevitabilities.

I was not. I was. I am not. I don't care.

What's waiting for me when I die are the fulfillment of all of my failed dreams from when I was alive, and she'll be there too and we'll laugh and talk and embrace forever in a perfect state of non-existence. More than dead, not alive. I'm going to let myself sink because I'm so confident that it will all be okay in death, at the end of all things, at the end of time itself. Whatever it is, it has to be good. It has to be a beautiful dream.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: LetMeOut67, Zyntkalla, teethreceiver and 4 others
chloeburbank

chloeburbank

hug me
Jan 30, 2026
67
Honestly I'm jealous of those at peace. I'm fucking terrified 😭
 
  • Like
Reactions: lilies.in.heaven, witchcraft, itsgone2 and 1 other person
bunnycats

bunnycats

New Member
Mar 14, 2026
1
to be honest i dont really care about death either. just knowing that i will be gone for eternity feels weird
 
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: witchcraft, Zyntkalla and OnMyLast Legs
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
47,613
Yes, in fact for me ceasing to exist is the only peace, only in non-existence will I be at peace from this dreadful, terrible existence of torturous suffering that I just always saw as a mistake, for me ceasing to exist would be the positive solution, it'd solve everything for me as after all if I don't exist I cannot suffer in any way, there is no suffering in the true permanent peace of non-existence and to never suffer again is just all I've ever hoped for.

I'd never wish to be burdened with this torturous, cruel existence that just causes harm and suffering with no limit as to how much agony one can feel, to me existing will always be dreadful and I find it so horrible and painful how the torture of existing can continue for decades longer just for one to face the agony of old age, to cease existing is all I hope for but all I truly want is to erase this existence, I want it to be like I never suffered at all.
 
theDunce

theDunce

Member
Feb 18, 2026
31
Searching for that peace. However, so far, I just feel the opposite.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: witchcraft and itsgone2
hurb

hurb

I care too much to give a f*ck
Jan 22, 2026
298
Tmrw is probably going to be my big day. And while i was at peace now im scared.
All im doing is checking this website on repeat , and it feels so miserable even for me. Man, reality's weight rly is crushing. But it's ok , this will be more fuel.
 
Last edited:
  • Hugs
Reactions: OnMyLast Legs
teethreceiver

teethreceiver

I dont want to be this kind of animal anymore
Mar 16, 2026
3
this is a really beautiful post that I resonate with greatly. its a very nice thing to be content with death.
 
  • Like
Reactions: pthnrdnojvsc
Zyntkalla

Zyntkalla

Welcome to hell on Earth
Aug 28, 2020
211
I am mostly at peace with it. I am only having trouble letting go of some things.I am still deciding if I should just not care or do the things that I would want to get done before I go. I only have three things that I would like to finish frist but I definitely won't have time with the limited time before I have to move out of my place.
 
I

itsgone2

-
Sep 21, 2025
1,451
Not really at peace with it. It's just something that needs to be done. Unfortunately.

Doing it though. Not at peace with that at all
 
  • Love
Reactions: OnMyLast Legs, teethreceiver and Zyntkalla
pthnrdnojvsc

pthnrdnojvsc

Extreme Pain is much worse than people know
Aug 12, 2019
4,290
yes my Death is the best thing by a quadrillion times . my Death is the escape from hell. and then in Death I'll be safe from ever suffering unending constant unbearable pain. because Death is eternal Non-existence as before I was born when I couldn't and can't suffer pain that's a billion times worse than the worst u can imagine. but while alive i can suffer such pain : and everyone says i have to remain in this dangerous state of living under threat of extreme torture, that i can't suicide. and I ask why do I have to live under threat of extreme torture or even if it wasn't so dangerous ? I don't have to
Tmrw is probably going to be my big day. And while i was at peace now im scared.
All im doing is checking this website on repeat , and it feels so miserable even for me. Man, reality's weight rly is crashing. But it's ok , this will be more fuel.
what method?
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: OnMyLast Legs
hurb

hurb

I care too much to give a f*ck
Jan 22, 2026
298
yes my Death is the best thing by a quadrillion times . my Death is the escape from hell. and then in Death I'll be safe from ever suffering unending constant unbearable pain. because Death is eternal Non-existence as before I was born when I couldn't and can't suffer pain that's a billion times worse than the worst u can imagine. but while alive i can suffer such pain : and everyone says i have to remain in this dangerous state of living under threat of extreme torture, that i can't suicide. and I ask why do I have to live under threat of extreme torture or even if it wasn't so dangerous ? I don't have to

what method?
Fsh, im gonna mess around partial but it probably wouldnt work. I just think its less cruel to die sitting than hanging. But , its going to be FSH
 

Similar threads

Liebestod
Replies
3
Views
263
Suicide Discussion
Chronical_Suicidal
Chronical_Suicidal
Defatigatis
Replies
2
Views
154
Suicide Discussion
Forever Sleep
F
race
Replies
12
Views
445
Suicide Discussion
FuneralCry
FuneralCry
owarikigan
Replies
0
Views
55
Suicide Discussion
owarikigan
owarikigan