anyone else feel at peace

[justfloating]

im sure im not the only one. knowing that suicide is an option and a way to escape the pain makes me feel relatively clam. it doesnt take away from the pain I feel, but knowing I can choose to end it gives me such a weird sense of relief.

I was walking through my city earlier today and I was just fully taking in the area that I've seen a thousand time before, I actually started crying knowing I may never walk this route again.

if I decide to CTB im sure I won't feel this sense of calmness, but it makes the lead up to it more bearable

 

[TheLastHumanRight]

It sounds related to this earlier post.

Spoiler: Suicidal ideation

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/suicidal-ideation-as-a-cope-and-drive.31777/

 

[NotMuchLongerPlease]

I feel anxious bc it feels like there's no way out

 

[justfloating]

It sounds related to this earlier post.

Spoiler: Suicidal ideation

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/suicidal-ideation-as-a-cope-and-drive.31777/

I agree with it, it gives me more of a fuck it attitude, but its not exactly what I meant. I just have peace as I know my suffering won't go on forever, ill either CTB, or choose not to if my situation improves. either way I won't be in eternal pain

I feel anxious bc it feels like there's no way out

I think for some people suicide is a choice, and for others they see it as the only way. for me it is a choice to end the pain, I know living won't kill me but I choose not to

 

[NotMuchLongerPlease]

I agree with it, it gives me more of a fuck it attitude, but its not exactly what I meant. I just have peace as I know my suffering won't go on forever, ill either CTB, or choose not to if my situation improves. either way I won't be in eternal pain

So you have a method that you're sure will work? What is it if you don't mind me asking

 

[justfloating]

So you have a method that you're sure will work? What is it if you don't mind me asking

I haven't got one yet. im in the uk and for me to access certain things is very difficult. train is a last resort, but im going to be looking into overdosing, preferably on party drugs haha