I am ctbing because of botched foot surgery which left me with severe neuropathic pain.
Is anyone here doing it because of unbearable pain or physical suffering?
Is anyone here doing it because of unbearable pain or physical suffering?
Redt2go
flower child
- Jan 5, 2019
- 1,643
Death.
Student
- Jan 5, 2019
- 140
I have severe chronic pain in my eyes caused partly by meibomian gland dysfunction and I also have severely compromised vision so you're not alone in suffering... Question is, is there a point to all this agony when we all die anyway???!
that sounds absolutely dreadful.
Are you legally blind because of it?
Death.
Student
- Jan 5, 2019
- 140
It is dreadful but I try my best to alleviate the symptoms through eye drops, Vitamin Supplements, Medication etc. There's no cure but it could be worse as atleast I can drive!
I've seen the best opthalmologists in the world to treat my condition and unfortunately this is the best it's gonna get for me (The absolute worst part of traveling is the excruciatingly dry air in the planes which makes me feel like gouging my eyes out after 8+ hour flights).
Perhaps the saddest thing about my condition is that it's not immediately "visible" so my suffering and symptoms are often dismissed by many as merely "imagined"
me too-it was that way for me too before I had the botched surgery.
It sounds like a very rare condition-I have never hear of it before and I worked in the pharmacological field before my illness.
I'm really sorry!
Angst Filled Fuck Up
Visionary
- Sep 9, 2018
- 2,936
Not pain per se, but I have an incurable orthostatic condition. It basically means my blood pressure/pulse aren't normal. As soon as I stand up my BPM goes to 120 and my blood pressure tanks. Suffice to say I am always exhausted, dizzy, spaced out and weak. I feel like I've been hit with a tranquilizer dart, or that I'm sleepwalking. I spend most of my day in bed because of it. Coming up to five years of it now. It's not serious in the strictest sense of the word but it's ruined my quality of life.
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WhiteRabbit
I'm late, i'm late. For a very important date.
- Feb 12, 2019
- 1,393
Pain is the main reason i'm going to CTB. Two years ago I started having widespread nerve pain. I have a severe disc degeneration in my back. I also have lupus. Chronic pain is a hell I wouldn't wish on anyone. I actually liked my life before. I don't really want to die, but I can't take the pain anymore.
Yes. After treatment for cancer, I've gone downhill. I wish I would have declined treatment. Sometimes the treatment has worse effects than the disease. Not always, I'm sure, but we often don't hear about the down side of treatment.
lululoo
Mage
- Dec 15, 2018
- 558
Yes. It is one of my main reason. Not only is the pain and fatigue hard to live with, but it has made my depression so much worse. And cut off my ability/motivation to fix my life.
You are not alone!
You are not alone!
Yeah its my reason, ovwrwhelming fatigue, constant pain. Pretty much 0 quality of life. Feels irrational if i didn't ctb. Just waiting on that N.
311
Dying cat
- Nov 24, 2018
- 779
I was happy and hopeful before they completely fucked me up in a hospital. I don't have a life anymore because of this condition and don't see anyway out. It has honestly broken my spirit and will to live.
311
Dying cat
- Nov 24, 2018
- 779
Misanthrope
Mage
- Oct 23, 2018
- 557
It is a pretty major factor in my desire to end it. Constant nausea and vomiting is eroding me away. It is having a domino effect on my health as other issues are now cropping up. Yesterday I missed my bucket yet again and it ended up all over the carpet. I cleaned it up eventually but the action made me vomit again. I wonder sometimes if it is possible to break your back from dry heaving too hard? Sure feels like it. I would laugh at the absurdity my life has been reduced to but that also may make me puke. There is no quality of life living like this. I am starting to become afraid of food and even moving. It is extremely difficult to concentrate on anything either. There really is nothing left I am just a husk getting sicker, existing in the lives of others in periphery. I have obligations though that I must see safe enough. I don't want to die but I don't want to live this way either.
I don't have much physically wrong, but I have a fluctuating mental state. I sympathize with you guys who have more severe physical pain issues. I feel that I have severe enough mental stuff that ctb is the only option.
TheGoodGuy
Visionary
- Aug 27, 2018
- 2,996
Yes I have a throat problem and a lot of allergies so it takes me 45 minutes to eat a meal and to give an example it takes me 20 minutes to eat a cheeseburger from Mc Donalds I also cant work because of this due to only having 20 minutes launch break and I cant get disability money I also cant socialize or get a GF because of this.
And this is "just" my throat and allergy problems I have a ton of other physical and mental problems as well.
And this is "just" my throat and allergy problems I have a ton of other physical and mental problems as well.
Beyondajoke
Member
- Jul 18, 2018
- 29
My brain has been a chronic illness for 30 odd years, now I've gone and given myself fibromyalgia on top of it - and among other places, it bizarrely affects my hands, making lots of tasks difficult and limiting everything. Life is a sick joke at this point and I don't want to stick around to see what disaster happens next.
311
Dying cat
- Nov 24, 2018
- 779
311
Dying cat
- Nov 24, 2018
- 779
Partly. Im fed up of being ill all the time. Lost all my friends because they were fed up with me making excuses and being too ill to do anything. Noone would care if i was in hospital or bother to see if i was ok. Constant hospital appts and get nowhere. Adds to the depression and being in pain all the time
Jumper
Student
- Jun 18, 2019
- 149
I also have a chronic foot pain condition. Surgery didn't work. I was suicidal before this happened (bipolar), and now I'm desperate to CTB. Like someone said, I don't wish to stick around to see which disaster strikes next.
cornflowerblue
Mage
- Feb 18, 2019
- 553
Mostly mental. I have tried every therapy and medication, even many experimental options and clinical trials. I have done all behavioral interventions. They helped a lot, but not enough. My life is fine. I have money, I have a successful career, I have loving friends and family, I have hobbies. I have purpose and direction in life. There's nothing in my life that I want to change, there's nobody else I can think of whose life I'd rather have. I still want to CTB.
Mort
No use to know one
- Feb 15, 2019
- 622
I am mess up with arthritis in most of my joints all so the bottom vertebra in my back is slowly falling apart. When does ho i be in a wheelchair unable to walk and pissing and shitting my self. End up like a big baby be unfair on my folks they both in they 70s and they dont need that . All so my kidneys and liver are mess up to its from all the painkillers i am taking do going to end up dead grom that . The doctors try to give me medication to help my kidneys and liver but i just throw them away they know i am going to end up dead. So why try to prolong my life the sooner the better i say not told the doctor that if i did he put me in the nut house. Have to be so careful around him he very prolife just my luck to LOL well thats me and my pain:) tata for now
LifeIsNotFun
Mage
- Jun 1, 2019
- 530
as an aside, depression is a chronic illness, not physical pain but emotional pain can be just as bad, as we all know.
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