any young people with chronic pain/health problems?

[sadgirl9999]

i feel really alone. i'm 21 and have been having daily excruciating pain since i was 18, combined with multiple autoimmune diseases that give me fatigue and brain fog. i feel like i'm wasting my life and i miss how happy and healthy i used to be. my mom is in so much debt because of my medical conditions. i also have anxiety (it was SEVERE for a long time but it's actually improved) and depression. but my main reason for wanting to go is because of the physical pain. every decision i make is based off of it - i really want to move out but need to be close to doctors and specialists. i want a job but can barely get out of bed. i would have to get on disability which makes me feel guilty and this isn't what i wanted. i had a ton of scholarships and my college was basically paid for, i had to drop out and break up with my boyfriend because one of my conditions causes sexual pain too. i just want to be healthy.
it hurts :(

 

[TimeToBiteTheDust]

Here. Back pain. I want to be healthy again but I can't reverse my condition. It sucks that's why I'm considering ctb.

 

[schopenh]

Not as young as you. When it all kicked off I was 26. I'm 29 now.
I spent ten months bed bound and after a massive spinal operation I am simply housebound now (sitting and standing function returned) but I have neuropathic pain coursing through my legs 24/7 (as well as random fasciculations). Recently I developed interstitial cystitis from the corticosteroids I was taking to try help the neuropathic inflammation (it didn't even help). If I could click my fingers to get rid of one of them I honestly don't know which one I'd pick.
I can barely leave my house or concentrate on doing anything meaningful during the day. I lost my girlfriend, a lot of friends, my PhD, but most of all joy.
My life is just praying that the symptoms spontaneously resolve or someone drives their car through my bedroom wall and into me. Have had a 'death kit' assembled for nearly a year now.

 

[Aap]

I'm sorry. It can be impossible for those without severe chronic pain, even those close to you, to understand it. Many with it look fine and even seem fine some of the time.

the only suggestion I can offer is to find a pain management physician who is willing to try ketamine. Some have reported significant benefits. I wish I was one of them.

 

[Busoccupant]

I have had depression episodes during lots of years. Lately I tried to fight against them by thinking of my enviable healthy condition. I was trying to thank life because of owning a perfect body with 0 illnesses.
And after having these thoughs, the worst came: tinnitus and hyperacusis. It's been a really tought time since then. My life won't ever be the same. I feel really sorry for me.
Maybe this was the final boost that I needed to ctb. I'm 27.

 

[BPD Barbie]

I was diagnosed with Crohns disease at 21 and had a bowel resection at 22. Been on every type of med and even done clinical trials for it. I know how it feels, it kinda takes a piece of your life away with it.

 

[Deleted member 17949]

I imagine it's extremely exhausting and must be made worse by the fact that it's not too common in young people. I really sympathize with you, having some random issue like this drain your energy is unfair.

 

[Ghost2211]

I have CFS, I'm 36.

 

[theguineapigking]

I'm sorry to hear what you are all going through.

I'm 22. I have mitochondrial disease, which causes extreme cfs, brain fog, migraines(I always have one, but it isn't always very painful..it fluctuates, but excedrin helps when it gets bad), reynauds, hypoglycemia, I have a form of autism(was worse when I was young), chronic dry eyes, etc. I'm not bed-ridden, as I can work part time(15-20hrs) I can carry chairs up and down a ladder at work for customers, I can run and workout, but in spurts. Many people didn't believe my illness because I look healthy. But they don't see me sitting around most of the time. All I can say is f*** my life. At least my parents are supportive, as one of them has it and my siblings do(I bet they're going to have kids too and pass it on :/)


I can't believe how shitty this ass shit world is. The fact that some of you can't even get out of bed is saddening. I wish we could all be cured.


@sadgirl9999: Have you ever tried medical marijuana? Some people swear it helps.. even the CBD(which doesn't get you high). It didn't really help my migraines plus I don't like getting high, but maybe it'd help you? The USA covers many chronic pain conditions..

 

[Wrennie]

I have a rare complication from chronic Lyme disease where I'll need biweekly IVIG infusions for the rest of my life in order to prevent the myelin coating of my nerves from being eaten away by my body's faulty immunological reaction.

Oh and I also jumped off of a building a few months ago in a moment of distress and my back is beyond screwed.

 

[Amumu]

I have a disease which concerns my jaws.
Moreover I have gum diseases
It's not horribly painful but it's annoying when it concerns the face.
I'm 21

 

[alexit]

i feel really alone. i'm 21 and have been having daily excruciating pain since i was 18, combined with multiple autoimmune diseases that give me fatigue and brain fog. i feel like i'm wasting my life and i miss how happy and healthy i used to be. my mom is in so much debt because of my medical conditions. i also have anxiety (it was SEVERE for a long time but it's actually improved) and depression. but my main reason for wanting to go is because of the physical pain. every decision i make is based off of it - i really want to move out but need to be close to doctors and specialists. i want a job but can barely get out of bed. i would have to get on disability which makes me feel guilty and this isn't what i wanted. i had a ton of scholarships and my college was basically paid for, i had to drop out and break up with my boyfriend because one of my conditions causes sexual pain too. i just want to be healthy.
it hurts :(

My chronic pain started at age 26. I'm 39 now.

 

[Life_and_Death]

Currently 21 but it started when I was 13. I have back pain that for the most part isn't horrible but can some times leave me limping or collapsing.

 

[alexit]

Currently 21 but it started when I was 13. I have back pain that for the most part isn't horrible but can some times leave me limping or collapsing.

That's rough. I'm sorry you've had to experience this. I know how bad it can get. I've been in so much pain, a gash on my leg didn't even register. In my last hospital visit, they had to point out the other injuries. The blood just felt like my leg was wet.

 

[Weightoftheworld]

Not really young but I'm 27. I have epilepsy, migraines, and restless leg syndrome. My mental health was already deteriorating before I was diagnosed so it's basically at rock bottom now. I'm so medicated though, I don't even care.

 

[alexit]

Not really young but I'm 27. I have epilepsy, migraines, and restless leg syndrome. My mental health was already deteriorating before I was diagnosed so it's basically at rock bottom now. I'm so medicated though, I don't even care.

Hey hey 27 is young. Killing me here....

 

[Weightoftheworld]

Hey hey 27 is young. Killing me here....

For someone that didn't think they'd make it to see 25, I don't consider it young.

 

[alexit]

For someone that didn't think they'd make it to see 25, I don't consider it young.

lol

 

[Worthless_nobody]

Me. I fell down concrete steps few years ago so I deal with daily chonic back pain, fibromyalgia, tinnitus, severe insomnia, migraines and ibs, and pain in my jaw from physical abuse from my ex. I'm in my late 20s and it gets so old hearing people say I'm faking it or I can get over it because I'm young. Opioids suck and make me sick and marijuana makes me paranoid, feeling sick and way way worse tinnitus so I have no options except benzos. Also can't get disability because the USA is cruel.

 

[ceelo]

I have a rare complication from chronic Lyme disease where I'll need biweekly IVIG infusions for the rest of my life in order to prevent the myelin coating of my nerves from being eaten away by my body's faulty immunological reaction.

Oh and I also jumped off of a building a few months ago in a moment of distress and my back is beyond screwed.

can chronic lymes ever be healed?

 

[crybaby]

omg same...but I am 18 years old :(

 

[AintNoWayOut]

oh yes, very similar situation.... im also 21, and have been dealing with severe neck/back issues since i turned 16... its definitely the main factor in my desire to go. its just taken away so many experiences and opportunities from my life, and it makes it damn near impossible to feel and function like a normal person. it affects EVERYTHING i do and think. once the comfort in your body is gone, you're no longer able to freely live your life and enjoy it the way you used to... it basically defines you and holds you back in every possible aspect. at least for me, with my type of pain, it does.

i've just gotten to the point where its becoming more and more difficult to cope with the fact that this bullshit has not only robbed me of six very important years of my life, spent isolating myself from the world while others lived their lives and made all sorts of memories and progress, but it still affects me to this day... every day, every moment. if the pain went away right now, i'd still struggle with having missed out on so much of life, but i'd be able to move past it by focusing on the present/future and not taking the painlessness for granted. unfortunately though, the pain refuses to go away, which only gives me the options of living with it (which is more suffering than actual *living*) or dying, and as much as i dont want to die, its a better option than living with in this physical/mental hell for several more decades which will only worsen overtime. if only it'd go away. if only it had never began. everything would be better, i'd actually feel like a person and be able to reach my potential. life's very cruel and unforgiving.

 

[Ligottifan95]

Have dealt with chronic pelvic pain/pelvic floor dysfunction since the age of twenty, now 25. Had to drop out of college and began seeing urologists and physical therapists. I have many symptoms that seem rare and havent been studied, along with stomach issues, urgency in bladder and near constant urge to have a bowel movement, and now a rectal prolapse. The depression, anhedonia, anxiety, and hopelessness seems to intensify each passing year as I ponder all the wasted time of our so-called "youthful prime". Not much friends, not much independence, not any job, not any fun. The idea of this being permanent is dreadful thought, and i'd rather have the option of peaceful exit from this life and all its horrors.

 

[wunschtraum]

hello everybody
i have cfs / me / fm since 15 years. i never had a life. and now i am never cant leave my bed, cannot sleep anymore and have endless pain. and i am afraid.... i dont want to ctb... i always wanted to öive and i gave everything to make my situation bettet but NOTHING worked and now every quality of life is gone. i cant do nothing except suffering bit i dont want to understand that this is the end of my life.... to read and write in this forum is already too much but i do it although...

hope somebody can understand me a little bit :)

 

[KuriGohan&Kamehameha]

Yes, I'm the same age as you, 21 years old, and we've been suffering for roughly the same period of time. Chronic illness is a real bitch.

As the years have passed, I have pretty much had to grow accustomed to being in some sort of pain constantly. If I'm not having stomach cramps, then I have headaches, if I'm not having headaches, I'm sore, if I'm not sore I'm hyper aware of the neuropathic pain in my legs and hands, it's always something.

Chronic fatigue and the accompanying brainfog destroyed any semblance of a chance I had at enjoying my life. Couple this with autism and ptsd and it's almost as if my existence has authored the recipe for a giant shit sandwich.

Seeing other people partying, going on holiday, having nights out, planning for their future careers, and actually enjoying university makes me sad and envious beyond belief. That is a lifestyle I can never obtain.

I will definitely ctb because of all my conditions. This is no way to exist. It truly isn't. I am at risk for developing autoimmune diseases in the future due to genetics, and I would rather die in the most painful way imaginable than have to suffer from one more ailment on top of all the other diseases and disorders my broken body has left me with.

The thought of having to frequently attend doctors appointments or step foot in a hospital again triggers flashbacks of the most horrible, traumatising memories that I keep under lock and key in the recesses of my mind. I don't want to have to exist in constant torment from ptsd and iatrogenic harm.

We are the sort of cases that people tend to neglect when they showcase their tales of inspiration porn. The majority of people do not realize how it feels to be in a state of agony 24/7.

 

[L951788]

I've been diagnosed with Dysautonomia and have some type of autoimmune thing. The autoimmune thing is essentially why I left school back when I was a teenager. I've had numerous signs of lupus but don't have a full-on diagnosis tho.

 

[GemCami]

Yup. Im 29, and ive got back, hip, knee pain, always fatigued, and i went through a gender transition. The pain is kinda so ever present, im just used to dealing with it by now.

 

[L951788]

hello everybody
i have cfs / me / fm since 15 years. i never had a life. and now i am never cant leave my bed, cannot sleep anymore and have endless pain. and i am afraid.... i dont want to ctb... i always wanted to öive and i gave everything to make my situation bettet but NOTHING worked and now every quality of life is gone. i cant do nothing except suffering bit i dont want to understand that this is the end of my life.... to read and write in this forum is already too much but i do it although...

hope somebody can understand me a little bit :)

:(
Aww I'm sorry. This really resonates with me especially when I started getting severe the year before I got diagnosed with Dysautonomia. I probably qualify for CFS too. I even have the swollen lymph nodes in my neck and my abdomen.
Tbh I truly want to live too I think but the situation just isn't gonna work out I believe. I've had some good times over this rough road but it's been pretty terrible. My family at least is able to house me and keep me alive but they've not been very supportive. Both my parents don't have the best personalities and their marriage was horrendous. My mom would even turn my sister against me.

It's a very lonely form of constant suffering. I've done therapy from 2015-2020 and taken a bunch of meds. Nothing has helped or worked and both have probably been more of a negative then a positive.

I really feel like I'm on death's doorstep. I feel like my life is coming to a close. It'a a shame. Only recently did I start to get upset at everything and how it's gone. I coped well from 2013-2019 I think but as of 2020 and this year I've done a lot of looking around and being envious of others who are living their normal lives. It really sucks.

I wish I had a better answer for you but me and you are looking for the same thing basically. Physical health problems ruin everything. Social isolation, no one wants to mate with you aka you don't get a sexual relationship, activities you once enjoyed are no more, so much stuff...

It's really a shame life is so painful but like you I don't know what to do.

 

[lifegoeson]

Ulcerative colitis (very similar to Crohn's. I'm in my early 20s

 

[Desdemona]

Mid twenties here, pretty bad off for the last year but I've had health issues going years and years back . Just surviving at this point, not living