Hey,
I have long suffered from anxiety mostly stemming from growing up around my alcoholic father, this developed into depression and I turned to Alcohol myself.
I ended up isolating myself from my entire family and all but one friend for over a decade and everyday just went to work came home and drank my sorrows away.
During this time of isolation I went to rehab a few times and other psychiatric places. Somehow I managed to keep my head above water and maintain a job.
A few years back I developed I tremor down my left side, it was minor at first and I ignored it but it became increasingly worse and I found my stress, anxiety and depression seriously elevated. I started to suspect this was more than just a side effect of psych meds and went to my docs who referred me to a neurologist who referred me to a second neurologist who has diagnosed me with Parkinson's.
I have reconnected with my family but can't ask for or expect much support given my long absence. I am a few weeks into taking medication for parkinsons and whilst sometimes it helps it is very up and down and I'm very concerned about my prospects long term.
I don't particularly want to die but I also don't want to suffer needlessly and end up in a position where I am so dysfunctional that I couldn't independently end things if I needed. My state has voluntary Euthanasia laws but you have to be 4 weeks away from dying before being eligible so its not going to be sympathetic to my plight.
I'm certainly going to give the meds a good chance to work, maybe my life will turn around but its very hard to feel optimistic at this point.
Thank you for reading my vent / story.
I have long suffered from anxiety mostly stemming from growing up around my alcoholic father, this developed into depression and I turned to Alcohol myself.
I ended up isolating myself from my entire family and all but one friend for over a decade and everyday just went to work came home and drank my sorrows away.
During this time of isolation I went to rehab a few times and other psychiatric places. Somehow I managed to keep my head above water and maintain a job.
A few years back I developed I tremor down my left side, it was minor at first and I ignored it but it became increasingly worse and I found my stress, anxiety and depression seriously elevated. I started to suspect this was more than just a side effect of psych meds and went to my docs who referred me to a neurologist who referred me to a second neurologist who has diagnosed me with Parkinson's.
I have reconnected with my family but can't ask for or expect much support given my long absence. I am a few weeks into taking medication for parkinsons and whilst sometimes it helps it is very up and down and I'm very concerned about my prospects long term.
I don't particularly want to die but I also don't want to suffer needlessly and end up in a position where I am so dysfunctional that I couldn't independently end things if I needed. My state has voluntary Euthanasia laws but you have to be 4 weeks away from dying before being eligible so its not going to be sympathetic to my plight.
I'm certainly going to give the meds a good chance to work, maybe my life will turn around but its very hard to feel optimistic at this point.
Thank you for reading my vent / story.
