Discussion Antidepressants caused suicidality

[spanishguy22]

Yes. Sertraline. I took one tooth off. I had 200mg, when I tried ctb. I asked my psychiatrist to return to sertraline 4 months ago. But I just have 100mg. I still need more energy

you took one tooth off? what u mean?

 

[JadedGray]

Your experiences with Cymbalta and Effexor were mine as well, except that I weened myself off the Effexor after a week so that surreal waking dream state abated. How long were you on Effexor?

I was previously on it in my teens for 2 years, but at that time I didn't have any problems with it. I went on it again 5 years ago and was on it for 1 year before I discontinued it. I'm glad that it stopped for you. I wouldn't want anyone else having to go through this for years like I have.

 

[spanishguy22]

I was previously on it in my teens for 2 years, but at that time I didn't have any problems with it. I went on it again 5 years ago and was on it for 1 year before I discontinued it. I'm glad that it stopped for you. I wouldn't want anyone else having to go through this for years like I have.

Did the dpdr start right when you got on effexor? else it ma have been caused by something else

 

[JadedGray]

Did the dpdr start right when you got on effexor? else it ma have been caused by something else

Not right away. But I had been taking Cymbalta for 1 year before that without these problems (I had to discontinue it because of Insomnia). I started experiencing dissociative episodes with the Effexor, but they didn't last, so I thought nothing of it at the time and kept taking it until the DP/DR. I then weaned myself off it but the DP/DR didn't go away and 4 years later, I'm still dealing with it.

 

[spanishguy22]

I'm so sorry you are experiencing that hell. I'm almost two weeks in on zoloft and I felt the same way. The craving to ctb is actually fading. I'm not sure if I'm happy about that??? I still want to ctb but it doesn't feel like I have to do it immediately.

This is happening now to me too in 7th day. I mean I won't ever not want to ctb but at least it's not a strong craving like before

 

[Weems]

So even if I stop the meds I could never be the old me? Like the me that knew how to hold conversations other than about suicide? I'm afraid that my heavy cannabis use cause3f a lot of my problem. I quit using and I was expecting things to get better but its gotten way more depressing.

My states of psychosis are typically about being stalked. Like this last round I believed I was being stalked by celebrities and Satan himself. I thought people in other cars were some how there to protect me by sending me signs based off their liscense plates. It's so hard on me bc once in 2011 I was admitted to a psych ward for thinking a lady in a jeep was trying to kill me. A couple months after being release I was actually hit by a jeep( not intentional) and then run over by a honda. It just gets super weird and feels so real. I'm tired of living with the embarassment. I've thought God was talking to me through the tv.... I'm tired of it and I fear it will only get worse.

You're not alone. I went through something similar in the fall. Terrifying delusions, weird OCD/superstitious behavior I thought God wanted me to carry out. Lost my job after transparent madness at work. Treated my friends to a lot of nonsensical babbling. There's no going back from this, even though they said it was OK. Once you see this from someone, that person ceases to be someone you listen to. That's that.

I thought I was ashamed of choices I'd made before all this.

Edit: oh and I think weed is a big part of it. I think it really changed my brain. I just stayed dumb while smoking regularly but when I quit things started "all coming together" in a really sick way