Venting Angry vent.

[SmallKoy]

I've had a terrible night and I'm not going to write every detail about it here but the events of tonight and my current life situation is driving me crazy. I'm so terrible at college, I've basically done nothing all week and I have to rewrite a paper for a philosophy class which I really do not want to do because I am horrible at putting my thoughts into words and it frustrates me to no end. I hope I get my fucking paper done tomorrow but I just can't bear to do it. I hate ADHD, I hate feeling like I'm just lazy. All I want to do is lay in bed. I want to hurt myself. I did hurt myself, but I wish I had the guts to hurt myself worse and worse everytime but I can't take the pain at a certain point. I wish I could just stop existing. I wouldn't worry about anything ever again if I could simply choose to die peacefully and painlessly.