LunarPyotr
Похорони меня возле МКАДа
- Jul 4, 2020
- 507
So, where to begin..
I'm trying to continue living my life but it's hard.
I still have my bad thoughts but I try to survive.
I also got a shitty job where I stand the whole day at a machine and pull out some plastic pipes that get later on shipped to the local hospital.
At least I don't have to lift anything and since I'm just sitting there and only stand up every 2 minutes to pull out a pipe from the machine, I just don't mind that.
I already got paid for working 2 days last month since I got the job at the end of last month.
I don't get paid that much but I it's enough to have enough geld to waste for some useless crap like a new car stereo.
At least I work at the end of the hall so that I could pretend that I'm wearing hearing protection but in reality I just have my earphones in and listen to some podcasts.
What else..
Back in that psych ward or whatever you want call it, I met a girl and I got along with her very well.
I bought a broken iPhone 13 Pro that didn't had working FaceID and cracked back but 4real, as long as I can just use it as a multimedia device, I don't mind.
I use that crapPhone for writing iMessages thing and FaceTiming her. I got a pre-activated SIM card that I inserted to that phone in order to use those Apple services.
Sure, I could keep using my secure Android devices with that privacy oriented firmware but there's no iServices there and I don't feel like installing "Data Farm" apps like WhatsApp or Instagram and I just paid 110$ for that iPhone on eBay where I had to pick it up from some random tobacco store.
For sure I can say that she is a bit obsessive and has abandonment issues but hey, I don't judge and I'm not perfect either.
We're talking like each day, even during work and you could say that I could be a bit naive but I also got her a pre-activated SIM and I'm paying 14Euro per month for the 15gb data package in order to keep in touch with her. Those 14Eur isn't much. I could say that having contact with someone all the time is very helping me.
I stopped smoking and starting using electronic cigarettes instead, I was for 2 days away from Germany in the mountain called Sněžka. Was a very relaxing trip and I managed to rent an 1998 Fiat Ducato Camper in order to avoid paying for hotels. There was a nice view up there.
Other than this, I finally managed to stop S/H and I kept the kitchen knife which I used for this purpose as a memory from my darkest times.
I also completely disconnected from my parents and I'm glad I did it. I basically changed my numbers, filed a order through my lawyer where they aren't allowed near me and I lately saw on Google Maps that they still keep doing their stuff. The house is looking very bad. The roof looks like it's almost collapsing. When it comes to that order, the name of my sis isn't in the paperwork. She didn't bother me and never did anything bad to me.
Anyway, that's the current state of things.
I'll be getting ready for my night shift and go offline again.
On Saturday I'm only going there for 3 hours and then I can go home again..
It's somewhat annoying but at least I'm getting 15% extra money for each hour I spend there, so it's not that bad.
I'm trying to continue living my life but it's hard.
I still have my bad thoughts but I try to survive.
I also got a shitty job where I stand the whole day at a machine and pull out some plastic pipes that get later on shipped to the local hospital.
At least I don't have to lift anything and since I'm just sitting there and only stand up every 2 minutes to pull out a pipe from the machine, I just don't mind that.
I already got paid for working 2 days last month since I got the job at the end of last month.
I don't get paid that much but I it's enough to have enough geld to waste for some useless crap like a new car stereo.
At least I work at the end of the hall so that I could pretend that I'm wearing hearing protection but in reality I just have my earphones in and listen to some podcasts.
What else..
Back in that psych ward or whatever you want call it, I met a girl and I got along with her very well.
I bought a broken iPhone 13 Pro that didn't had working FaceID and cracked back but 4real, as long as I can just use it as a multimedia device, I don't mind.
I use that crapPhone for writing iMessages thing and FaceTiming her. I got a pre-activated SIM card that I inserted to that phone in order to use those Apple services.
Sure, I could keep using my secure Android devices with that privacy oriented firmware but there's no iServices there and I don't feel like installing "Data Farm" apps like WhatsApp or Instagram and I just paid 110$ for that iPhone on eBay where I had to pick it up from some random tobacco store.
For sure I can say that she is a bit obsessive and has abandonment issues but hey, I don't judge and I'm not perfect either.
We're talking like each day, even during work and you could say that I could be a bit naive but I also got her a pre-activated SIM and I'm paying 14Euro per month for the 15gb data package in order to keep in touch with her. Those 14Eur isn't much. I could say that having contact with someone all the time is very helping me.
I stopped smoking and starting using electronic cigarettes instead, I was for 2 days away from Germany in the mountain called Sněžka. Was a very relaxing trip and I managed to rent an 1998 Fiat Ducato Camper in order to avoid paying for hotels. There was a nice view up there.
Other than this, I finally managed to stop S/H and I kept the kitchen knife which I used for this purpose as a memory from my darkest times.
I also completely disconnected from my parents and I'm glad I did it. I basically changed my numbers, filed a order through my lawyer where they aren't allowed near me and I lately saw on Google Maps that they still keep doing their stuff. The house is looking very bad. The roof looks like it's almost collapsing. When it comes to that order, the name of my sis isn't in the paperwork. She didn't bother me and never did anything bad to me.
Anyway, that's the current state of things.
I'll be getting ready for my night shift and go offline again.
On Saturday I'm only going there for 3 hours and then I can go home again..
It's somewhat annoying but at least I'm getting 15% extra money for each hour I spend there, so it's not that bad.
