Discussion Almost impossible to discuss suicide with anyone

[wanna_die]

I am deeply interested in suicide discussions.

Yes I am suicidal, too. And it is mostly because of philosophical reasons. And I think quite many people in this modern world are also suicidal because life is getting harder and painful with all its demands and problems as we get older. But many people hide these suicidal thoughts because of stigma and taboo around it. So they would rather numb themselves by working, getting married, making children, traveling, becoming religious, following an ideology, taking drugs or whatever entertainment it can be just to delay the thoughts of how horrible and indifferent life actually is.

Sometimes I make jokes about suicide when I am around people, just to observe how they react. And I still feel we are not yet there to discuss openly. So this forum is unique in that sense---I just love free speech!

Probably the biggest reason why we cannot just say we are suicidal openly to our friends/relatives originates from dominant religions like Christianity/Islam which shape the way human herds think. Being grateful or thankfrul for your life is almost a default setting in present societies.

Even when people say that they do not believe in religions, there is already this residue of being thankful/grateful for the life we are born into. This is also another reason why people try hard to be happy, while realising year after year that happiness is just a moment in life when we shortly experience the absence of pain.

 

[yukiovos]

I fully agree.
Luckily I haven't been brainwashed to believe in any religion so its a lot easier for me to have a broader perspective on this existence.

I have no mental illness but I want to end my life as soon as possible and im gonna have to be very brave to go through my method

 

[wanna_die]

Can I ask the reason why you want to end your life, and what your method is.

Thank you!

 

[yukiovos]

Can I ask the reason why you want to end your life, and what your method is.

Thank you!

of course.

I want to end my life because I don't want to experience anything anymore, this idea was always comforting to me. Another reason is because since my early childhood I never experienced anything that I would describe as worth living for.

My plan is to find a high spot to jump from above 50m and land on hard surface so that my brain will shut down instantly because I already failed partial hanging.

 

[At The Bus Stop]

From my experiences, only those who have had suicidal tendencies will acknowledge your suicidal tendencies. I think if I mentioned it to a friend, they would shrug it off and say to speak to someone. But wouldn't ever follow up to make sure I was okay.

My mother however, would probably call me straight away and speak to me on the phone - and reach out daily to ensure I was okay because she has been in the same situation. Neither of them are religious, but their upbringings are vastly different. One struggled every day throughout childhood, the other had supportive family members who did and still do everything for their child.

I'm sure it's obvious, but the ones who struggle the most, understand the most. Some people care about you, until it requires them to handle some form of emotional burden. At which point, they aren't comfortable enough to listen and/or maintain some simple back and forth to make sure you're okay.

I've never spoken about my tendencies to anyone, not that I have fear of judgement or the lack of a support network. I just know that if I do CTB, it's a choice I want to make myself. And, informing them of my "mental state" would only add questioning on their minds of why they possibly didn't do more to help. Despite it never being their fault or responsibility.

I always appreciate learning new things and understanding peoples perspectives - because to even come close to understanding someone, you need to experience their pain too.

 

[Michelstaedter]

I am deeply interested in suicide discussions.

Yes I am suicidal, too. And it is mostly because of philosophical reasons. And I think quite many people in this modern world are also suicidal because life is getting harder and painful with all its demands and problems as we get older. But many people hide these suicidal thoughts because of stigma and taboo around it. So they would rather numb themselves by working, getting married, making children, traveling, becoming religious, following an ideology, taking drugs or whatever entertainment it can be just to delay the thoughts of how horrible and indifferent life actually is.

Sometimes I make jokes about suicide when I am around people, just to observe how they react. And I still feel we are not yet there to discuss openly. So this forum is unique in that sense---I just love free speech!

Probably the biggest reason why we cannot just say we are suicidal openly to our friends/relatives originates from dominant religions like Christianity/Islam which shape the way human herds think. Being grateful or thankfrul for your life is almost a default setting in present societies.

Even when people say that they do not believe in religions, there is already this residue of being thankful/grateful for the life we are born into. This is also another reason why people try hard to be happy, while realising year after year that happiness is just a moment in life when we shortly experience the absence of pain.


Greetings from Denmark!

I've always thought it's ironic, since in general many of life's "satisfactions" lead to a certain, more rapid deterioration of life. It's like the machinery of a car that allows it to go from one place to another, but somehow this causes it to break down and malfunction over time. At the same time, as you say, we're told how "sacred" life is, when the things we do, for the most part, are as mundane as thinking about death, suicide, and things that have to do with something that goes "against" the "purity" that comes with wanting to live.

Religions and people's morals are a big influence on this, but I also believe the fear of death, because if we were to die in a week, in this society, we would certainly have a vision of freedom, of detachment (ironically what religions like Buddhism preach), and we could live more authentically, without ties and without disenchantment. Many people, as long as they live, continue working in jobs they don't like, live lives they don't like, and end up dying in ways they wouldn't have wanted (accidents or murders in horrible countries like mine).
Taking your own life when you consider it is the ideal time, is a perfect way to live and die without having to think about a tomorrow that will never come (many people live off dreams they will never achieve) and so live day to day with the feeling that it is your life that you are living, not what society wants, but in the end society wants you to despise death, hate suicide and cling to living, despite how tragically sad it is for many of us and people who suffer day to day in this world.

 

[telekon]

Same.

When I started to feel suicidal, it amazed me just how few avenues there are to get help and how much you absolutely cannot speak about the subject. Even ChatGPT shuts down any kind of conversation only to throw the useless 988 number at you every time.

I don't think life is all about numbing your emotions for most people; I think having a family and a job and a purpose are all genuinely fulfilling things that people do to get through the day and they enjoy life. Life on earth is really beautiful until you add selfishness and the greed of humanity into the mix. If people banded together to actually make life worth living for every human soul, they could — but that isn't happening. Personally, I think it's important to at least try to make the world a better place any way that you can.