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nux_walpurgis
Me, my whispers and a broken God
- Oct 18, 2023
- 49
They are making plans for the future. To move away from here. Meanwhile, I am stuck, no plans, nothing at all. Paralysed by my constant anxiety. Feeling like a little kid. Adulthood is too much. Life is too much. Soon I will be the only one left here. I will be the girl who peaked in highschool.
The person I am in love with just told me he is planning to leave the country when he is finished with uni. I am heart broken to say the least. I haven't felt that hopeless in months. I had dared to dream a life with him. The last time I had allowed myself to dream anything in a long time. I held on to that dream for years. Now it's gone. I return to nothing. It's easier that way. Safer.
This feeling in my chest is too painful. Suffocating. I don't want to exist anymore.
The person I am in love with just told me he is planning to leave the country when he is finished with uni. I am heart broken to say the least. I haven't felt that hopeless in months. I had dared to dream a life with him. The last time I had allowed myself to dream anything in a long time. I held on to that dream for years. Now it's gone. I return to nothing. It's easier that way. Safer.
This feeling in my chest is too painful. Suffocating. I don't want to exist anymore.