Alcoholic forever?

[BluesRunTheGame]

I know I write some drunk controversial shit posts here but kids you gotta help me out.

I got OCD, depression and anxiety.

And fucking alcohol addiction.

Went to an AA meeting on Sunday - literally went to church lol - but I'm not there yet.

Anyone else relate? Chester Bennington killed himself 'cause of this whole comorbid depression, addiction shit.

I doubt I've got long.

Btw sorry if anyone thinks I'm a mysogynist.

I've just had a rough ride with women but like a true sucker, I love them so, nevertheless.

 

[FTL.Wanderer]

Chester Bennington killed himself 'cause of this whole comorbid depression, addiction shit.

I doubt I've got long.

I feel you. I'm a sugarholic. People laugh when I confess that, but my addiction has made life a lot worse. And you're right about not being able to deal with BOTH depression and addiction. I once told a therapist how desperate I was dealing with my food addiction. She said to me, with a smile on her face, "I wouldn't worry about it. At least you're alive." ???

Normal people and a lot of so-called professionals don't get the hell--the multiplicative effects--of depression/addiction. There's nothing you can do to explain it to them. They just spout modern self-help babble at you or condemn you because, apparently, you want to be struggling. Never occurs to them the addition is just about the only way you can begin to numb the pain. This after YEARS of professional therapy that did nothing or made things worse.

Anyway, right there with you.

 

[InNihilum]

Can totally relate. I fell for the euphoric sensation alcohol gives the early times. Now it's either my depression is worse because I'm sober, or I feel like a mess when I'm drunk. Anyway, the capacity to have any good thought or emotion has been destroyed along the way and is since a long time far gone.

I sought help about this addiction, even private meetings with an alcohol-specific therapist did not help. I doubt AA meetings can realy show some results?

 

[BluesRunTheGame]

Now it's either my depression is worse because I'm sober, or I feel like a mess when I'm drunk.

Yep for me it's like a choice of sadness or madness? I guess I like to mix it up.

But yeah one meeting don't mean much; once you become a regular it becomes like a support group, even though it's meant to be about giving up your will to a higher power or whatever.

 

[watereyes]

I'm allergic to alxohol. Even a light beer will make me throw up. Its benzo tiiiiiime

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

We all got something man. Or many things. I am forever 30lbs overweight and yo yo diet. I smoke half a pack a day. I love beer and pizza. The point is we're hardwired to be addicted and screw things up for ourselves. I would say just be comfortable but with a relative degree of moderation.

 

[Superdeterminist]

I feel you. I'm a sugarholic. People laugh when I confess that, but my addiction has made life a lot worse. And you're right about not being able to deal with BOTH depression and addiction. I once told a therapist how desperate I was dealing with my food addiction. She said to me, with a smile on her face, "I wouldn't worry about it. At least you're alive." ???

Normal people and a lot of so-called professionals don't get the hell--the multiplicative effects--of depression/addiction. There's nothing you can do to explain it to them. They just spout modern self-help babble at you or condemn you because, apparently, you want to be struggling. Never occurs to them the addition is just about the only way you can begin to numb the pain. This after YEARS of professional therapy that did nothing or made things worse.

Anyway, right there with you.

I also have a problem with sugar. Lots of people laugh at the idea of 'sugar addiction' but I'm confident that it's a real problem in the world.

 

[FTL.Wanderer]

I sought help about this addiction, even private meetings with an alcohol-specific therapist did not help.

Thanks for your honesty. Most of society has been sold on the story that therapy and pharmaceuticals fix ALL problems. If they don't work for you, then you didn't try hard enough, they say. But we know otherwise.

but I'm confident that it's a real problem in the world.

People laugh at/joke about sugar addiction, even with all the studies that show it's real. Have you found any way to even begin to manage it?

 

[juraviel]

People laugh at/joke about sugar addiction, even with all the studies that show it's real. Have you found any way to even begin to manage it?

do you crave junk food or just sugar specifically. because it sounds a lot like a nutritional imbalance. https://www.byrdie.com/what-do-sugar-cravings-mean

 

[Superdeterminist]

People laugh at/joke about sugar addiction, even with all the studies that show it's real. Have you found any way to even begin to manage it?

No, it bothers me every day, I think about how I can try to free myself from the addiction, but every single day I just end up eating some sugary thing. It really feels impossibly difficult.

 

[InNihilum]

Thanks for your honesty. Most of society has been sold on the story that therapy and pharmaceuticals fix ALL problems. If they don't work for you, then you didn't try hard enough, they say. But we know otherwise.

Yep, I feel like therapy and medical stuff about addictions work mainly for people who are not really sick. There should also be rare cases where it actually help but too few.

Like, how 'You're addicted? then stop it' and other generic stuff thrown at our faces should even resolve anything? We are capable to think by ourselves at this kind of simplistic solutions thanks.

 

[FTL.Wanderer]

do you crave junk food or just sugar specifically. because it sounds a lot like a nutritional imbalance. https://www.byrdie.com/what-do-sugar-cravings-mean

Thanks for sharing that--really. In my case, though, it's purely an emotional crutch. I've had nutritionalists, dietitians, and private coaches since I was in school. I eat, other than my addiction, pretty healthy. I use sugar for the same reason my others use drugs or alcohol: to escape a day-to-day hell. :)

 

[NormaJeane]

I have stopped drinking alcohol without problems, but for me it is harder to stop taking sleeping pills.

 

[FTL.Wanderer]

I have stopped drinking alcohol without problems, but for me it is harder to stop taking sleeping pills.

I've given up sugar for years at a time. But I always go back to it because absolutely nothing else available to me (therapy, hiking, nature, project work, journaling...) blunts the daily pain. Why do you continue with sleeping pills?

 

[UnemployedMD]

I'm an alcoholic too. I've been to many AA meetings and generally dislike them due to the overly religious approach and the fact that they try to label everyone as being sick, powerless, etc. I know they all mean well, but they also advocate for total abstinence from alcohol which wasn't something I liked either. I was drinking a liter of hard liquor a day in the Spring but managed to cut back significantly a couple months ago to only a bottle a week. The physical withdrawal from drinking constantly everyday was really bad and the shakes/hallucinations were absolutely terrifying. I am also depressed/anxious and began drinking to cope with that.

Maybe try cutting back a bit? I don't think I could ever stop forever, but it wasn't as hard as I thought it would be to taper the amount I was drinking to something that isn't actively killing you.

 

[FTL.Wanderer]

I've been to many AA meetings and generally dislike them due to the overly religious approach and the fact that they try to label everyone as being sick, powerless, etc.

Up until a few years ago, whenever I moved to a new city I'd check out AA meetings. Sometimes back-to-back meetings so I wouldn't have to be alone all day and night. In big cities, I'd go to night meetings up to midnight. Then I'd sit in a coffeeshop (Dunkin Donuts?) to be around other people. AA was the only place I could go without people treating me like I was covered in excrement. The meetings did feel preachy to me, but then in school I'd joined a cult (born-again-Christian...) just for non-threatening companionship. So I could deal with AA's religious undertones. Before the pandemic, I was looking for some AA meetings within a half-hour drive from me. Don't know why I wrote all this. Guess to confess that for all its flaws, AA at least didn't treat me like a sub-human. :/ Hope you found something that works for you.