Discussion Afraid of death

[Avicii]

So is anyone actually afraid ?? I obviously want to ctb otherwise wouldn't have an account on here but apart from upsetting my family especially mum , is that even though it will come naturally I'm a little scared of death even though I'm not religious as I near death I've considered going to church for confession with the 1% just incase there is actually a God ( Xanax user on here who ctb last post said same just incase and she said a prayer it's amazing what the thought of death does - an aunt on her death bed never religious going to church etc sat on her bed reciting prayers holding rosary beads)

 

[Ssrejisser]

Me too...

 

[spanishguy22]

Honestly it says a lot about the ridiculousnesss of it all when you find yourself thinking you "believe" in something youve never believed in your whole life just so you dont go to hell "just in case". Religion does a good job about keeping people chained for reasons like this.
I never believed in this so even if I hadnt suicided id go to hell based in this stupid ass religion. Also babies or kids who arent baptized and die go to hell. people who masturbate go to hell. Gay men who are born that way and dont choose what they can feel= hell. Sex without marriage= hell. its really absurd
The fear mongering is strong and works really well.

 

[Final Escape]

No, but the process of dying, organ failure. I don't want to feel it as my body dies lol! The actual death, I imagine will feel like I never existed. I can't remember before I was here, so I doubt I'll be aware that I'm dead either.

 

[Jc40]

I'm afraid of the unknowing. Not afraid of hell, maybe I'm afraid of the nothingness. Yeah, I can't mind before I was born so am comforted by that thought.

 

[Jean Améry]

So is anyone actually afraid ?? I obviously want to ctb otherwise wouldn't have an account on here but apart from upsetting my family especially mum , is that even though it will come naturally I'm a little scared of death even though I'm not religious as I near death I've considered going to church for confession with the 1% just incase there is actually a God ( Xanax user on here who ctb last post said same just incase and she said a prayer it's amazing what the thought of death does - an aunt on her death bed never religious going to church etc sat on her bed reciting prayers holding rosary beads)

Of death itself? No. Of failing and pain/discomfort? Yes.

If you'd feel better after confession why not? I wouldn't mention an imment death-wish/plan though as that priest could be tempted to call the police although theoretically you should be protected by the secrecy of confession.

Fear can do strange things to people: that is a fact. Including turning rational people in religious nutjobs.

 

[Escaper Boy]

Death is indeed a scary thing. It's the kind of fear that paralyzes your body from top to bottom. The ultimate unknown combined with the mysterious air of it doesn't help things either.

The last time I tried to jump from the bridge, my limbs were literally petrified by fear. I couldn't do it. It was like the entire cells of my body had their own mind/will, and their will overrode my own conscious will. And I was forced to submit to SI.

 

[brbr]

im afraid of both, death and failure with pain/discomfort/social problems
thats one of the reasons im here, to find support and lose the fear of ctb

 

[Maksimka Ai]

Fucking IS at the very last moment inhibits everything, more than 10 attempts to shoot, 1 poisoning-unsuccessful, 4 attempts to hang. Today I bought Klonapine, this thing as N, will cut it out after 10 minutes forever, waiting for the moment to exit

 

[spanishguy22]

Fucking IS at the very last moment inhibits everything, more than 10 attempts to shoot, 1 poisoning-unsuccessful, 4 attempts to hang. Today I bought Klonapine, this thing as N, will cut it out after 10 minutes forever, waiting for the moment to exit

Isn't shooting best? I wish I had Access to gun

 

[Maksimka Ai]

Isn't shooting best? I wish I had Access to gun

I tried, at the very last moment gave up

 

[JadedGray]

When it comes to death and what comes after, I'm not afraid of non-existence, but I'm afraid of whether there is an afterlife and what it will be like if there is one.

 

[TAW122]

When I was younger, yes I had a fear of death and it's natural. After all, our bodies and genetics tell us that to keep life at all costs and avoid pain and death. As I've gotten older, especially after 18, I've slowly come to accept death as part of life and am no longer afraid of death, just the process of dying (especially if it is uncomfortable or painful).

 

[Donewitheverything]

I've learned not to fear death when I was about 15. Why fear the inevitable? Even if there were an afterlife, death would still be inevitable. However, I do have a fear of ctb, one of the reasons being that I would mess up and I'd end up either paraplegic or in a vegetative state; I am uncoordinated to a moderate degree, so there's that.

 

[bugfriendly]

Only reason religion exists is to give people hope. People naturally are very scared of dying and sometimes that can affect them and give them troubles while they are living so they find comfort in telling themselves everything will be okay I will never really die I will never not exist I will always be connected with the ones I love its okay. I wish I had that ignorance. would make life a lot easier. The fact is, time is constant. Hundred years from now you will be in the exact same place you were hundred years ago. Nonexistent. No point cutting your time short but no point in letting it drag on. Pick one and commit to it.

 

[EddieAllenPoe]

Yeah. I'm afraid of death too. Why do you think we are that way? It almost seems like we are that way for a reason. If suicide were rational then we should have no fear of death. Right? Maybe not... Perhaps our survival instinct came from millions of years of evolution and that is how we kept on living. But how did a universe that came from nothing determine we would evolve instincts that favored life over death? It seems specific and not arbitrary at all. It really make you wonder how that could be. The last person said the only reason religion exists is to give people hope. How did a universe that sprang from nothingness determine we would have religions that would promote hope? Why didn't we have religions that promoted despair and suicide? It seems specific and not arbitrary at all. Do you think there is a reason you are alive? You also seem very specific, unique, and not arbitrary at all. I don't know why I'm on here rambling. I guess I'm just fulfilling my predestined purpose given to me by my genes and environmental upbringing.

 

[Wanderer_with_Death]

If it helps giving any insight, both my personal "attempts" had me at death's door. The first attempt had a lot of pain but then a bliss of peace, the second attempt, I wasn't aware of it but came back to consciousness and was in a panic and "survival fear".

There is pain naturally with dying, some more than others, its natural to fear Death, its the "unknown" and there is the religious/spiritual factors also inquired, its a matter of perception and subjective instances. You can have Death as a friend, or a fear. But personally I feel that in order to actually live, one must actually come to terms with Death. Tomorrow is never guaranteed afterall.

 

[AngelGirl]

I've learned not to fear death when I was about 15. Why fear the inevitable? Even if there were an afterlife, death would still be inevitable. However, I do have a fear of ctb, one of the reasons being that I would mess up and I'd end up either paraplegic or in a vegetative state; I am uncoordinated to a moderate degree, so there's that.

I feel the same. It IS inevitable, it is just a matter of time... you can ctb now, or you can die later. We are all destined to die.

However, I am so afraid of non existence. Losing my consciousness and I do not wake up ten years later or million years later. There's no me, the world doesn't exist for me anymore.

 

[KnightOfEnceladus]

@AngelGirl: don't worry; by definition, non-existence is the one thing you cannot experience, because by definition you will not exist to experience it. There is nothing that can possibly be less scary than non-existence for this reason.

Consider the Buddhist idea that all existence is suffering. Non-existence is therefore not-suffering. If there is no you, you won't suffer from the feeling of non-existence, if that makes sense. You won't care, because you can't care, because there is no you to do the caring. Hope that helps...

 

[Severen]

What is more horrifying than life? If I die and go to hell, it just means, I will be sent back here...

 

[KnightOfEnceladus]

@Severen: THIS is where I can help someone, finally! I spent a long time studying early Christianity and the religions that lead to it, those being Judaism and Zoroastrianism, which may be the single most important religion no one has ever heard of.

To make a long story short, the Jews got the idea of eschatology ("the end of the world" basically) during the Babylonian Exile, as their captors were Zoroastrians, or Parsees. The Zoroastrian scriptures say that at the end of the world, Ahura Mazda who is basically the Parsee God-figure will wage war against the extant forces of Angra Mainyu/Ahriman (the "Devil"), melt all the metals in the earth's crust (compare this with Revelation...) and it will flood the entire world and flow down to Worst Existence (Hell, more or less). Righteous people will perceive it as something like a warm milk bath, but the wicked including Angra Mainyu will be utterly annihilated, burned both physically and metaphysically such that they can never exist again.

Plus, many of the early churches and church fathers were Annihilationist or even Universalist. My own admittedly poor reading of the Koine the oldest extant manuscripts we have are written in also reveals something interesting: Matthew 25:47, the end of the Parable of the Sheep and Goats, reads "and these shall go away into eternal punishment" in English. But in Greek, the words are "aionios kolasis," roughly "age-enduring chastisement/correction." I personally believe an Annihilationist reading of the Bible is correct, that it is saying that at some point evil and the doers thereof will be completely, utterly destroyed. It's very Zoroastrian itself.

 

[Robbyna]

Yes, I'm terrified of what death could be. That and hurting my family is all that keeps me alive.

 

[AngelGirl]

@Severen: THIS is where I can help someone, finally! I spent a long time studying early Christianity and the religions that lead to it, those being Judaism and Zoroastrianism, which may be the single most important religion no one has ever heard of.

To make a long story short, the Jews got the idea of eschatology ("the end of the world" basically) during the Babylonian Exile, as their captors were Zoroastrians, or Parsees. The Zoroastrian scriptures say that at the end of the world, Ahura Mazda who is basically the Parsee God-figure will wage war against the extant forces of Angra Mainyu/Ahriman (the "Devil"), melt all the metals in the earth's crust (compare this with Revelation...) and it will flood the entire world and flow down to Worst Existence (Hell, more or less). Righteous people will perceive it as something like a warm milk bath, but the wicked including Angra Mainyu will be utterly annihilated, burned both physically and metaphysically such that they can never exist again.

Plus, many of the early churches and church fathers were Annihilationist or even Universalist. My own admittedly poor reading of the Koine the oldest extant manuscripts we have are written in also reveals something interesting: Matthew 25:47, the end of the Parable of the Sheep and Goats, reads "and these shall go away into eternal punishment" in English. But in Greek, the words are "aionios kolasis," roughly "age-enduring chastisement/correction." I personally believe an Annihilationist reading of the Bible is correct, that it is saying that at some point evil and the doers thereof will be completely, utterly destroyed. It's very Zoroastrian itself.

Very informative!