Discussion A greentext thread...

[OliverTreeLver]

THE GREENTEXT THREAD​

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Welcome to the greentext thread! For those who know, you know what to do. Post your own "greentext" recreation/story under here. For those who don't, a short explanation and my own example.

Greentext is a feature on the anonymous image board website [4chan] (https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/4chan) that allows users to turn a line of text green by inserting a rightward pointing arrow (>) before it.

The format has become widely known for short, anecdotal stories and narrations known as greentext stories which generally feature an unexpected or comedic punchline. Greentext may also be used to mock another person's point or comedically paraphrase something. Go wild! Here is an example:

> Be me, 19, unmotivated and depressed
> Struggling to keep up with college, barely hanging on
> Have an amazing boyfriend who supports me through it all
> Suddenly, he breaks up with me
> Feel like I've lost my anchor, my reason to keep going
> Start using drugs to cope with the pain and loneliness
> What begins as occasional use quickly spirals into addiction
> Skip classes, ignore responsibilities, alienate friends
> Each hit numbs the heartbreak but deepens the emptiness inside
> MFW realizing I've lost everything that mattered to me
> Feelsbadman

Good luck people! Have fun making them!

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

>Be me
>30 year old kissless dateless virgin Asian American male
>first love was a crush from 5th grade to my second year of college who never liked me back
>second love was a fictional character (cringe)
>third love was a girl from work who seemed interested in me at first but then chose another guy
>seemingly forever etches in my brain a preference for only white blonde girls
>soul breaks, realize im unlovable
>four years later, 2020
>Join a suicide forum because it seems like the only way out from my suffering
>talk about how me being a virgin incel makes me want to die all the time
>female member of this site messages me, saying she saw my posts and doesn't mind that im a 26 year old incel
>she's a 9/10 21 yo blonde qt with an Asian fetish
>she happens to only live about 20 minutes away from me
>start planning with her when to meet up, easier said than done during peak California pandemic quarantine times
>we hit it off, spend the next few days revealing some of our deepest secrets and vulnerabilities over messages
>holy shit she seems like the one, guys
>4th love but that's ok even though 4 is bad luck in Chinese culture
>jk, after five days she decides im too good for her because she physically can't have kids and I only said I might be interested in them eventually
>she tells me to find a better girl than her but the real reason is she probably just didn't like that I still live with my mom
>tfw I couldn't even successfully get with a girl who literally had zero problems with me being an Asian or an incel
>Three years later, 29 years old
>still haven't gotten over her or the other love interests
>decide to finally get off my ass and get a real job
>business degree is useless in this job market without the right nepotism connections
>finally get hired by a popular retail store
>shitty part time job but I don't care I just want some money to fund my suicide before I turn 30
>eventually come to know this one girl who works in a different section than me
>doesn't seem initially like my type, kind of shorter (5'3) than I have liked in the past and has brown hair instead of blonde
>get to know her a little through talking and stuff. She compliments my height a lot (6ft)
>without warning I inexplicably develop a crush on her, might be because she seems to be the only one I have a remote attraction to showing an interest in me
>unfortunately realizing this causes me to act really weird around her potentially driving away
>every time I see her flips back and forth between "It's Joever" and "We're so Barack"
>don't have the balls to just tell her how I feel about her because I'm afraid of rejection for the 4th time in my life
>I'm too old for this, I'm sick of being rejected
>Start having constant anxiety attacks anytime I'm not sure if she likes me or not
>even past my 30th birthday I still can't lock in on my suicide plans
>Now, after a few months
>still too bitchmade to even ask her out again

Hope you all enjoyed my shitty story. Fingers crossed that I CTB before I can ruin her life by inserting myself into it.