It's one of those sayings that was unhelpful and patronising on it's inception. Since then it seems to have been printed on cereal boxes and become the mantra of healthy humans thinking they are sharing a nugget of wisdom that is capable of drilling some sense into actively suicidal people. It seems to have been regurgitated to the point that it is thrown around by people that haven't even taken the time to actually analyse what that statement may mean to some of us.
What they don't understand is that we aren't stupid individuals that haven't contemplated the finality of suicide, I mean THAT'S THE POINT, the finality is a big fucking virtue to suicidal people.
Suicide is a permanent solution... well excuse me for not being dissuaded by that.
To a temporary problem... ok in some cases problems are temporary - ignoring people with chronic conditions since that saying doesn't even apply to them (although I bet they still get it rammed down their throats) - lets focus on people going through a "rough patch". So I wont deny that it's possible for some people to come out the other end of hardships smelling of roses, good for them! But let's not tar everyone with the same brush and assume that things will certainly improve eventually. Here's the thing, these "temporary problems" differ wildly from person to person. And is there nothing to be said about how many of these "temporary problems" a person is willing to endure? Life can beat the best of us to our knees, and there's a social approval awarded to anyone that stands back up. We've all heard of these inspirational heroes, less so of the the countless people that don't get back up. Are the people that don't get back up weak and cowardly? NO THEY'RE FUCKING NOT!
I wonder how many of these people rose again, simply because the act of suicide is fucking SCARY, it's not for the faint of heart, it takes tremendous bravery and strength to willingly terminate yourself. And what about the people that rose only to be kicked in the balls again, and again, who now live a sad lonely existence whose best friends have four legs and a tail? Heroes right? I'm not so sure personally.
Now, it's admirable that people can weather a storm and come back swinging, I take my hat off to them, but let's be a little more tactful for how these kinds of statements can actually belittle and trivialise someone's legitimate suffering.
Sometimes a person gets slapped around to the point where they don't want to fight anymore, sometimes it's not even that they don't believe that things can get better, sometimes people do not want it to get better. They've had their spirit and vitality for life sucked from their very souls. You guys that keep repeating this drivel are not helping anyone, in fact in many cases you are being downright insulting. There are people in this world that if you gave them a billion dollars tomorrow, they'd still be dead within the week. It's not always these "problems" that are the reason for suicide, usually they are just catalysts to ignite the motivation to die, a lot of people were suffering well before they lost their jobs, or spouses or whatever it may be.
To a person that is just done with life, has no more desire to put up a fight, and don't even care to fix a problem. To tell them "Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem" as though you've just made an irrefutable claim to live... well, I hate to break it to you, but to some of us you've just made an irrefutable reason to die.
Please for the love of god, stop saying this pap to suicidal people! If you want to genuinely help a person in these positions, don't patronise them, they are well aware of the gravity and consequences of their actions, and just fucking listen to them, let them talk freely about their wish to die, maybe they wont feel so alienated and alone in such a dark time. If they are going to commit suicide, believe me... they will, and you missed an opportunity to let them feel validated and a last taste of human connection before they went, that's not in vain just because they died, kindness and understanding is always a worthwhile expression of humanness.
Peace
