2nd Last Day (Methodology feedback)

[Eire1992]

First thread I've made but I'm looking for some feedback on methodology and advice.

My SN finally arrived and having blood tested it, it looks good. I had planned to wait and use a test kit on it but the delivery of that kit has been pushed back to August and I don't have another 6 weeks in me.

So today, I put my plans in motion. I've booked the hotel for the weekend. I have everything packed, including my backup method (good rope). My alibi is in place, my letters are written. And I have never felt so calm in my life. My stomach has stopped churning. My mind is calm and for the first time on a long time, more or less at rest. I'll do a proper goodbye thread tomorrow before I start the process (plan on drinking the SN at midnight Friday night BST time) but I wanted a little advice before then.

I have my method set but feedback is always welcome. Before leaving feedback though please be aware, I won't be deterred. It's happening tomorrow night. If something can't be changed before then, I'll either leave it in or not utilise whatever it is.

-Fast pretty much all day tomorrow

-Been taking the antiemetic for a few days now, continue with that (10mg Domperidone x3 daily)

-3pm hotel check-in (booked for 2 nights and requested a room away from other guests due to Covid concerns)

-11pm 1000mg Paracetamol

-11:15pm 30mg Domperidone

-11:30pm double dose of an antacid. I'm thinking Nexium as it's OTC here but wanted feedback. Tagamet isn't an option here.

-11:30pm sedative. Again, wanted advice. I have 2 at my disposal, Phenegran or Quetiapine. I don't have access to benzos. I DO have access to a lot of Amitriptyline though as well, as I've been weaning myself off it because it doesn't play nicely with Domperidone.

-00:00am 25mg SN in 50ml of water (2 additional drinks prepared in case)

Should have a solid 36 hours from the time I drink the SN to the point where someone comes to see why I haven't checked out of the room. Plenty of time. And I plan to put a chair right in front of the door with a note on it to call emergency services and not to come in. Hopefully spare the poor bastard who comes to check from finding me. So ye, I need to make a decision regarding the sedative and the antacid, some feedback would be greatly appreciated.

The other thing I wanted advice on is I want to use this site right up to the end, but at the same time, I don't want my death to be linked to here, the site has enough problems over stuff like that as it is. I'm thinking connect through a VPN from tomorrow onwards and use TOR. I plan to change all my passwords to random alphanumeric strings tomorrow evening and set a timer for my phone/laptop to turn off. My hope is nobody will be able to gain access to check what I've been browsing and even if they did, TOR doesn't automatically reopen pages that were closed due to a shutdown. Thoughts? I really don't want to bring hassle down on the site. I've only been here a short time but it's done so much for me in that time.

So ye, that's pretty much that. Feedback would be great and as I said, I'll do a proper goodbye thread tomorrow. Replies will be limited from me until tonight as it's a weekday so I'm in company most of the day but I'll be sure to read every response (if there are any lol).

Hope you all have a good day and thanks in advance,
Eire

 

[hʚll]

can u get ranitidine? since it's an H2-receptor antagonist and works the same way like tagamet. in most countries it's otc..
good luck!

 

[Eire1992]

can u get ranitidine? since it's an H2-receptor antagonist and works the same way like tagamet. in most countries it's otc..
good luck!

Just checked, it was recalled as a possible carcinogen here in 2019. It's not illegal and is still OTC but most places never bothered restocking it after the recall. So I'll check for it when I do a pharmacy run in the morning to get a few last odd and ends but it's not likely they'll have it unfortunately.

 

[mothflakes]

It sounds like your well prepared. I don't know too much about this stuff, but the thing that I'm most worried about is the increased heartbeats. Did you try to get something for that? Also, your idea about leaving a note in front of the door to maybe spare the person coming in from seeing you is very kind, and I'm definitely going to use it myself when the time comes. I don't know you, and I know there's not a lot I can say, so I'll just wish you peace of mind.

 

[Eire1992]

It sounds like your well prepared. I don't know too much about this stuff, but the thing that I'm most worried about is the increased heartbeats. Did you try to get something for that? Also, your idea about leaving a note in front of the door to maybe spare the person coming in from seeing you is very kind, and I'm definitely going to use it myself when the time comes. I don't know you, and I know there's not a lot I can say, so I'll just wish you peace of mind.

Thank you for your kind words. And ye I tried to get propranolol but because of my prescription for Amitriptyline, no doctor would prescribe it unfortunately. I'm not too worried about that aspect of things. Tachycardia doesn't bother me in the slightest. Had an experience when I was a teenager where I drank something laced with Speed by mistake. I watched the entire 24 LeMans race without moving or sleeping and my heart pounding in my ears lol It just hasn't bothered me since then. Beta blockers are just a bastard to get in Ireland, even online.

And ye I'm really conscious of sparing as many people any sort of suffering. It takes me 2 mins to stick a chair with a note inside the door, but if that 2 mins means some 18 year old maid gets spared the trauma of finding me, then it was 2 mins well spent.

 

[boc]

You sound very prepared and in a clear state of mind. No recommendations, but wishing you peace on your journey. Keep us posted how things progress.

 

[Eire1992]

You sound very prepared and in a clear state of mind. No recommendations, but wishing you peace on your journey. Keep us posted how things progress.

I will ofc. And honestly this is the most at peace I've felt in a long time. It's long past time for the credits to roll on this thing we call life. Long past time.

 

[suicidesheep31]

I won't give you advices because I am not an expert. If you follow kind of the Stan's guide, you will be fine. I think either way that SN is reliable if you don't get found. I wish you the best. You can PM for whatever reasons. I am just sad to hear that's your last option. HUGS

 

[Wakawaka]

if vomiting doesnt bother you that much then im sure you will be fine, people pass out within a few minute, having thrown up mutliple times from drinking the thought doesnt bother me

 

[Eire1992]

I won't give you advices because I am not an expert. If you follow kind of the Stan's guide, you will be fine. I think either way that SN is reliable if you don't get found. I wish you the best. You can PM for whatever reasons. I am just sad to hear that's your last option. HUGS

Ye I am more or less following Stan's guide, substituting alternatives from the PPEH as needed based on availability here. Thank you for the kind words, I may take you up on that PM offer tomorrow. I expect the bus journey to Dublin will be hard but it's the road I'm now on and I don't feel anything can change that. We all walk this life, sometimes though we just have no choice other than to just stopped and saying enough is enough.

if vomiting doesnt bother you that much then im sure you will be fine, people pass out within a few minute, having thrown up mutliple times from drinking the thought doesnt bother me

The vomiting should be ok I hope, I've been very good about my antiemetic prep. Domperidone isn't quite as good as Meto I don't think but it should do the job. Plus I'm generally just not a puker. It'll probably happen, everything I've read says it's more or less inevitable but I don't think I'll be conscious when it happens. And if I am, well that's what the spare drinks are there for I suppose. Cross that bridge if I come to it.