Method 1 AM - Today is my Last Day on Earth

[Largeletters]

Today, March 7th, is my last day on earth. Assuming I go through with my plan, which I'm assuming I will. I've had a crazy past week, I have gone from high mania to the depths of my depression within hours. I'm not happy unless I am on Adderall. As much as I do not want to leave the ones I love, I just have to accept that things will always be this way for me.

I'm always going to be this awkward guy who can't talk to people for shit, always the more unattractive guy, the guy no one notices. I am done being pissed off and angry at not only the world for the cards I was dealt but other people for being hypocritical, immature, getting up in my face. I'm done with the guilt I have for so many of my words and actions. I'm done with the stress of building the future I'll never have.

I'm going to CTB around sunset tomorrow. If it's okay to say, my method will be jumping.

I don't know what's going to happen after death. At the very least, I hope I'm at peace.

I'll probably log in once more, confirming if I'm serious, and if I am I will make a goodbye thread.

 

[Lost in a Dream]

I wish you didn't have to suffer so much that you are making this decision, but if getting on the bus is the right decision for you, then I hope it brings you the peace you need. Good luck.

 

[Largeletters]

I wish you didn't have to suffer so much that you are making this decision, but if getting on the bus is the right decision for you, then I hope it brings you the peace you need. Good luck.

Thank you

 

[jgm63]

Wishing you the very best with everything

 

[highlyvolatile]

Sending big hugs and lots of love your way. ♡♡ Hoping for the best!

 

[popo]

Any reason on why you had chosen jumping over other methods such as partial?

 

[Hopeindeath!]

I'm sorry life is so bad for you. If you kept taking Adderall would you want to live?

 

[Largeletters]

Wishing you the very best with everything

Thank you

Sending big hugs and lots of love your way. ♡♡ Hoping for the best!

Thank you, you too

 

[Jean4]

Sending lots of love. If you want to talk we are here.

 

[Largeletters]

Any reason on why you had chosen jumping over other methods such as partial?

The way I see it, if I jump, I'm more in control of my decision. Plus, I'm pretty sure it'll work because people in my town have died that way.
Also, I am going to put one last post on my social media on the top of the building posting a small note.

 

[disabledandhopeless]

I wish you all the best and I hope everything goes well for you.

 

[Largeletters]

I'm sorry life is so bad for you. If you kept taking Adderall would you want to live?

Don't be sorry, it's no one's fault but mine, if even that. Thank you for your kindness and sympathy, though and no, I doubt it, because it's artificial happiness, it's the inability to sit still, my mind jumping around, having energy. It's not really related to loving being alive and not thinking in-depth about suicide.

 

[popo]

Yeah, I don't doubt that it'll work if you land on your head. It's too messy for me I guess so my method of choice is SN.

Also, what kind of post are you planning to post BTW?

 

[Largeletters]

Sending lots of love. If you want to talk we are here.

Thank you I don't have much to talk about, only that I'm scared that I won't go through with it, and I'll have to avoid this site like a coward even if I post my goodbye thread. Although, I'll probably post my goodbye thread from mobile when I'm moments away so I'm absolutely sure. I'm also scared about leaving the ones I love, I'm scared about leaving my girlfriend who says I'm the best thing in her life. I'm going to make sure my friends, who have met her a few times, take care of her and make sure she isn't lonely. That's my dying wish from them- that, and to make sure none of them CTB either.

I wish you all the best and I hope everything goes well for you. ❤

Thank you

 

[popo]

I don't have much to talk about, only that I'm scared that I won't go through with it, and I'll have to avoid this site like a coward even if I post my goodbye thread.

Just remember that CTB-ing is completely your choice and you should only do it when your mind is truly ready. Don't be ashamed to back out if you change your mind.

 

[Indieblue]

Hope you go in peace.

 

[Largeletters]

Yeah, I don't doubt that it'll work if you land on your head. It's too messy for me I guess so my method of choice is SN.

Also, what kind of post are you planning to post BTW?

I've never really been into the idea of SN for myself, but I hope if you go through with that or not, you find what you're looking for.

If you mean the post on my social media I previously mentioned to you, I'm probably going to post a photo of the sky, something showing where I am, as I don't want to really make a seemingly "empty" threat. I know that sounds cruel, but I want something kind of... confirming(?) my death if that makes sense. As for the caption I wrote it out, it's just a quote about leaving that I've always found to be beautiful, and an apology.

Just remember that CTB-ing is completely your choice and you should only do it when your mind is truly ready. Don't be ashamed to back out if you change your mind.

Thank you, that really reassures me. I doubt anyone on this site would degrade anyone for not going through with it, but still, you never know how some people are on here among all the nice ones.

Hope you go in peace.

Thank you, Indieblue. You, and everyone on this site, really, as well.

 

[Hopeindeath!]

Please don't feel like you have to avoid this site if you don't go through with it. Everyone is living at their own pace, and you can change your mind as much as you want. It's completely fine if you do, I will respect you.

 

[jgm63]

b.t.w. I have some general notes on delayed emails here :
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/sending-delayed-scheduled-messages-goodbye-notes-etc.32532/

Also, on social media, just in case you change your mind at the last minute, don't post anything too "irreversible", unless you have some method of doing a delayed posting that can be cancelled.

If you change your mind, there will be no shame, and you'll be fully welcome here !

 

[k75]

Thank you I don't have much to talk about, only that I'm scared that I won't go through with it, and I'll have to avoid this site like a coward even if I post my goodbye thread.

I'm so sorry. Just remember that it's nobody's choice but your own. It's your life, and this is the most important decision you'll make. It can't be undone, so you should be completely sure it's right for you.

There is nothing at all to be ashamed of if you change your mind and come back. Plenty of people do, and I've never seen anyone be unkind about it.

 

[selfhater]

i wish u peace:(♡

 

[Nem]

I hope you have an anxiety free decision regardless of the choice you make
Peace/hugs

 

[marcusuk63]

Good luck with whatever choice you make

 

[akrasia]

I wish you the best and I hope you find your peace. -hugs-

Also, are you willing to share the quote you would like to write on your social media? I would love to hear it

 

[Lostandfound7]

I'm sorry it has come to this, my honey..But if u change ur mind, we will b right here waiting to love on u and embrace u...Sending love

 

[MsMaudlin]

I wish you all the very best my friend, for your journey ahead.
Surrounding you with love and peace.
And a huge hug ❤❤

 

[Esc9434]

Today, March 7th, is my last day on earth. Assuming I go through with my plan, which I'm assuming I will. I've had a crazy past week, I have gone from high mania to the depths of my depression within hours. I'm not happy unless I am on Adderall. As much as I do not want to leave the ones I love, I just have to accept that things will always be this way for me.

So, you serve from ADD/ADHD? You used the word mania to depression, so you suffer from bipolar whatever?

I'm always going to be this awkward guy who can't talk to people for shit, always the more unattractive guy, the guy no one notices. I am done being pissed off and angry at not only the world for the cards I was dealt but other people for being hypocritical, immature, getting up in my face. I'm done with the guilt I have for so many of my words and actions. I'm done with the stress of building the future I'll never have.

Don't make this decision based on other people action towards you. Most people aren't shit. People exist out here you can be friends with. You found SS. Surround yourself with people who are doing things with their lives.

 

[Soraa]

I'm sorry this life has not been good to you and I'm sorry for you pain. I wish you peace with whatever decision you make <3

 

[Largeletters]

I'm sorry this life has not been good to you and I'm sorry for you pain. I wish you peace with whatever decision you make <3

Thank you Soraa, and to you as well

So, you serve from ADD/ADHD? You used the word mania to depression, so you suffer from bipolar whatever?



Don't make this decision based on other people action towards you. Most people aren't shit. People exist out here you can be friends with. You found SS. Surround yourself with people who are doing things with their lives.

I deal with inattentive ADHD. I am not sure I have bipolar, but I do experience symptoms of mania and short term happiness, yes.
Also, my decision is not based on other people's actions. I wouldn't kill myself out of spite and anger towards other people. I have been thinking about suicide for years and years.

 

[flower]

I'm sorry life has treated you this way, sending you love whatever happens we are here with you.