You ever think about how you will be remembered?

[Red Scare]

I had a bunch of music and art I wanted to finish or see published in some form before I ctb because I wanted to leave something behind or at least be remembered by someone for something, but the more I think about it the more I feel like it won't even matter because regardless of if I am able to make a mark on humanity or history, in a trillion years, it would still be gone. All reduced to dust, and not even another human being to remember.

I have all these unfinished art and music projects and I almost convinced myself to stick around long enough to bring it to some kind of competed state but feeling depressed I lost any motivation to work on it long ago, and I don't derive any joy from doing it anymore, so it seems like a waste of my energy to stick around long enough to finish any of it.

But then I wonder about what I leave behind, how people will remember me... I don't know why I should even care.

 

[Foresight]

No, we're all temporary. Music and art is for you in the moment, and I think that's worthy in itself.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I hope I'm remembered as a waste of time, space, and other resources who did everyone a favor by offing myself. That's the best I can hope for. In reality I'm probably going to be remembered as a deluded idiot whose circular reasoning left him with no other choice. That would be fine with me too.

The worst I could imagine is if people remember me as a good person who didn't need to die. There's so many things wrong with that assertion that I would almost wish that anyone who thinks that seriously reconsider their position.

 

[Sea Turtle]

Not really, at the end of the day the "memories" of us are just temporary as well, doomed to die with the person who remembers. In time, we will all be forgotten, though somewhat irrationally, I want to minimize the hurt it will inflict on those I care about.

 

[DetachedDreamer97]

Just a little. I kinda wish to leave the world with a mark and to be admired. But considering how I'm mostly invisible, I'm not sure how that'll be. Seems that is my fate... but I suppose affecting a few people is okay. I'll die in a positive light, and try remaining true to myself. Those who knew me and gave me the time of day will remember me fondly, as they'll see the good in me. It's a shame it'll have to be tragic, but hey... Such is life...

 

[Fadeawaaaay]

Well at this point I don't really feel anything or care about anything. But if I finally get my shit together and pull this off I will certainly be remembered as a person who killed them selves. Which is really not such a lovely way to be remembered.

 

[Al Cappella]

I really haven't thought about it much. Mostly I expect they'll remember the find bits, that's human nature as time goes on.

 

[FuneralCry]

I hope to be completely forgotten about, in an ideal world I would love to just disappear and have my existence erased from everyones memories. However, it does not really matter to me how others react after my death as I will not be there to see it. By that point, I will be gone, I will finally be at peace and nothing can hurt me. The thing that I want the most is to sleep forever.

 

[OldDrummer]

It's ironic. Before the recent suicidal ideation and in normal times, I used to fantasise about how I'd be remembered.

Now I really couldn't give a flying-f*ck.

I think it's because now things are getting real that I'm supressing the anticipation of the hurt that I know my ctb'ing will cause on those that I leave behind.

 

[WrongPlaceWrongTime]

Hoping my family can forget about me and move on quickly from my death

 

[Muse]

Nobody will ever miss me. I will be forgotten very soon or seen as a fragile woman.

 

[LoneMisery]

I know im going to be remembered as a person that never learned a skill a person who never loved himself like others love their selves. Im always going to be looked at like a wussy who couldnt handled life. But at the same time i dont care. Im trying to be respectful and ctb in a secluded area of the forest but now im thinking of just doing it in the garage. Im starting to lose more and more hope each and every day that i cant find work i cant have friends cuz im broke. Im going to be remembered as a person who just gave up. And thats ok

 

[Murasa]

Except for my close friends, I think that others will remember it because of the "unexpected" nature of my suicide, other than that I don't know how they will remember me, but I want to make sure that I don't leave traces on this forum, in addition to avoiding drama, I don't want that instead to recognize my condition they attribute my suicide to a dumb brainwashing.

 

[Squalo]

I don't think I'll be remembered, I've rarely left my small town of 16,000 people, and I've never done anything special.
I will be remembered for a few months as any other person who was found dead, nothing else.

 

[Huntfish34]

Sure I've thought about it before.... But as others have said ;. I will be dead and gone so it Ultimately doesn't matter. Oh well.

 

[LoneMisery]

It's been my experience that people don't really speak I'll about the dead like that. Men are expected to be stoic and never talk about their feelings, to be strong all the time, but I think that is a bunch of bull crap. I don't think it makes you a wuss, on the contrary I think in order to ctb takes a strength and resolve most people will never muster. People might say you were a sensitive and caring person, that you exhibited a type of inner strength that allowed you to hold on as long as you did. Be kind to yourself, at least while you're still here.

I appreciate that very much. Its just very difficult. My teeth are so bad i have no job. I cant get a call back from even fedex who apparently hires everyone. Im just losing all hope and getting really sick feeling from it all.

 

[NSA]

I had a bunch of music and art I wanted to finish or see published in some form before I ctb because I wanted to leave something behind or at least be remembered by someone for something, but the more I think about it the more I feel like it won't even matter because regardless of if I am able to make a mark on humanity or history, in a trillion years, it would still be gone. All reduced to dust, and not even another human being to remember.

I have all these unfinished art and music projects and I almost convinced myself to stick around long enough to bring it to some kind of competed state but feeling depressed I lost any motivation to work on it long ago, and I don't derive any joy from doing it anymore, so it seems like a waste of my energy to stick around long enough to finish any of it.

But then I wonder about what I leave behind, how people will remember me... I don't know why I should even care.

Same.

I paint, draw, have a few story, fanfic ideas. Sounds silly or maybe conceited but I want/wish they could be out there before I go. What makes all those other "famous" ones so special? I am not less than them no matter what "society" thinks.

Odds are that any originals I do finish will end up in the trash, since my family has zero appreciation for those things. The only way they will live on is digitally in some forum or archive of some kind, hopefully. And yes, conjuring up the motivation to try when it is likely (but not impossible) to be all for nothing, is hell.

Something I tell myself: What is waste? If I have it, use it. Once I'm dead I won't care, but I'm alive now so go ahead and care. Because why the hell not?
I am allowed to fucking care.

 

[8AEM]

Logically speaking, why would it matter? Dead people don't care how they'll be remembered.

 

[NSA]

Logically speaking, why would it matter? Dead people don't care how they'll be remembered.

If this was logical, none of us would be in this mess. Most humans, despite pretences to the contrary, are anything but logical

 

[GentleJerk]

Yes I do. I would like it if I accomplished something in my life that would be remembered through the ages, or made a significant impact on the world, but that's just not the way the cookie has crumbled.

At most I will have made some impact on the people throughout my life. At this point, I can only hope when all is said and done that this impact is mostly positive. And at least I have not contributed in any significant way to further messing things up on earth. There are some who believe that leaving as little impact and trace on the earth as possible is a good thing. Like a gentle monk living in harmony with the environment, with no worldly possessions or profitable business, one who vanishes without even leaving a footprint. This thought comforts me.

The how-will-you-be-remembered insecurity probably spawned the ancient Greek belief that only those who accomplish great and heroic feats go to a beautiful heavenly place after they die, and the vast majority of people end up in some boring, unexciting place that reflects their mediocrity. Their way of trying to encourage people to compete in society and achieve 'great things' most likely.

 

[Musketeer]

The one who ran away, No seriously i ran away from everything in my life and i live so secretive and so secluded no one will remember outside the people i left.

 

[TakeMeBack07]

I had a bunch of music and art I wanted to finish or see published in some form before I ctb because I wanted to leave something behind or at least be remembered by someone for something, but the more I think about it the more I feel like it won't even matter because regardless of if I am able to make a mark on humanity or history, in a trillion years, it would still be gone. All reduced to dust, and not even another human being to remember.

But then I wonder about what I leave behind, how people will remember me... I don't know why I should even care.

Yeah, don't be so arrogant. It's unhealthy.
we will be forgotten

 

[S like Siren]

I will not be remembered by anyone or at least not in a positive way ... I already know what others will think, my family will say: "ah well then she managed to commit suicide, I didn't think she would ever make it" my mother will complain to everybody what a bad person I was for having committed suicide and for having created problems for her even with my death, they will curse me every day because they will surely have to deal with the police and will therefore have problems with my suicide.
In case my former schoolmates find out, I'm sure they'll have a laugh and say, "but who?that loser?"
In any case I try not to think about what will happen after my death, I have thought about it for a long time and I would say that it is something that i should not have to care ... I try to stay focused only on the act that I have to do.

 

[Al_stargate]

I'd probably be remembered by; He had it all but wasted it.
I guess I just can't be happy. Something good happens to me I have to f*ck it up. Maybe it stems from my difficult childhood that programmed me to be unhappy. Who knows, is it destiny or my choice. Probably my choice, I guess devil is just stronger than me and tempts me too easily.

 

[Hurt]

I rarely do this. I think about how my death would impact people who love me and that's what keeps me from doing it. I dont know if it's selfish to think in ctb and not to think in how it would impact in your close ones. Sorry I dont want to sound ofensive.

 

[enau]

IT is probably strange, but i regret to leave something behind.I will leave memories for a few peoples, and it seems, in a good way (so, some of them will be in pain with my death.., but very rare people, )and i dont understand, why , and especially, why life was so painful despite of that.I whished the same than you before, leaving art, making creations , but.. now i somehow regret sooo much all this road of mine... i regret this life and what and where i am.
I wish now nothing to tie me to this world.I dont want to give anything to this world or to be from this place, or story of the world and human, i desire to go nowhere once for and for all.So i shared a lot of things i think, but in the end.. Why did i made all this way ?

i desire cbt because i dont want to exist finaly, i disagree plainly with existence XD , at the point that i refuse to survive anymore, refuse to repeat all this comedy /tragedy/Joke.Im in very bad situation mentaly and in my life where i would need streng and motivation for pursue a living, but i disagree with ..life, so i dont want to give of me to this world and life more than i did too much.I dont even want to be heard anymore..
well i say that but.. in the end, sometimes, i try again, for exceptions only, and yes sometimes creations haunt me again , and i think oh i dont want to disapear before doing that ( but not in long terme perspective, not for be remembred, but.. just its there in my head and i have the urge to exteriorise it x) like an urge to pee x) )