Discussion "You don't want to die, you want to start living"

[barely_afloat]

How do you feel about this quote? Do you think there's some truth to it?

 

[LaVieEnRose]

Depends on who it is addressed to. If taken as axiom, well, nothing is really that cut-and-dry when it comes to people, though it would probably generally apply to a large portion of people seriously contemplating suicide.

 

[WhatCouldHaveBeen32]

It's just plain out wrong, most of the times you are annoyed of how the problem of suicide falls on you and not wanting to do it before you can explain your situation. Most people just tell you "well if you didn't commit yet, you wanted to start living, if you wanted to commit you would have done it, people do it all the time" which is basically a goofy way of telling you "you don't benefit me enough to care, if you want to die go for it but I can't say it outloud because of laws and societal status".

Right now I have enough money to buy SN and I actually might go for it but it doesn't change a thing, I feel like people in general will not understand why I am choosing to kill myself and that is a big problem, people understand why women choose abortion or why they demand protected sex, AT LEAST I HOPE THEY DO. But people don't understand why I am choosing to go out of my way on the "dark web" and buy a substance from a sketchy dealer to end my life.

I don't want to start living, I want people to acknowledge why I want to die before I do it so that they mold society in a way where there won't be as many people who die or if they can't/DON'T WANT to do that, at least make it so that they can die peacefully and humanely.


People will never take you or your requests seriously regardless fyi, unless you can literally put the whole planet earth under your thumb like a god-like being and make them fear you , it's kind of disgusting to think but meh, I wait for pigeons to waddle and I pick up snails to put them on leaves, they are beneath me in theory and practice but I don't care, if only some people could have at least half that compassion for their human counterparts.

 

[Redacted24]

It has some merit for me.
I've come close to being done a few times, and most recently a couple of years ago decided to end my life... as it is now- in an abusive relationship, a terrible work environment. And then try to find out if living is possible after I shed those elements.

If not, well I have alternatives to physical existence too, and am more than capable of seeing them through.

 

[Forever Sleep]

In an ideal world, where people can freely enjoy life, it could be true. It doesn't take into account why that person isn't living life to the fullest now though.

Do they have anhedonia or depression? Those things can diminish our interest or enjoyment of life. Are there other illnesses- mental or physical that cause the experience to be less than pleasant? Can they afford to live? Most of the nicer things in life cost money. Even if the activity is free, can they spare the time and energy to do it?

It's surely far more important to address the issues as to why the person isn't able to live a full life rather than just command them to go do it! Besides 'wanting' something doesn't necessarily mean they'll get it. Firstly- do they want anything still? If they're that depressed, maybe not! If they want to say travel the world- can they afford it? Some things aren't even feasible! It's like saying- 'You don't want to be poor. You want to be rich!' Of course they do. How do they become rich though?

 

[FuneralCry]

No because I do wish to cease existing and it's all I could ever hope for, for me non-existence is all that's positive, I'd just never wish for the cruel, torturous abomination of existence and I'd be so relieved to never exist ever again, I personally just want peace instead of suffering, I find it deeply undesirable to exist in every way and simply just existing is enough to make me wish for the peace of an eternal dreamless sleep. All I hope and wish for is to be permanently free from this existence, existence to me is a burden that I wish was never imposed more than anything, I'm always so tired of being burdened with this existence I always saw as a mistake in the first place, I'd always prefer to not exist but more than anything I wish I never suffered at all, the fact this existence was even imposed is the most terrible tragedy to me.

 

[slamjoetry]

It really depends on the individual. I feel like it applies to me, as I feel like I've never truly "lived" the way other people get to, and I've always been existing in this sort of purgatory where nothing ever changes and I never feel at peace. Getting to "live" would be great, but seems unobtainable to me at the moment, so that's why I want to die. But I'm sure there's people who just plain wanna die no matter what.

 

[x3la]

Personally? Definitely. The main reason for me wanting to ctb is because i feel like i missed out in life, and that it's too late anyways to do the things i want to do. I don't suffer from depression - i can find joy in things. I just don't know how to get them.

But for others? That's more of a mixed bag.

 

[33-vertebrae]

It's true for me.

Death is not my true desire, it just feels like the only alternative to constant dread/angst/depression/oppression/infirmity.

Like a person jumping out of the window of a tall burning building because they don't want to get licked by the flames.

 

[ShatteredSerenity]

I don't feel that way because I was living a meaningful life that I enjoyed a lot, then I lost everything practically overnight thanks to bipolar disorder and divorce. What I want is my old life back, but that's impossible. Starting a new life at age 43 with nothing to my name and severe mental illness feels absolutely horrible, it's not the kind of life that's worth living.

 

[SilentSadness]

Well it's just a quote to shut someone up or control them, so it's not very nice in my opinion.

 

[TransilvanianHunger]

I'm sure there are exceptions to this but, in a general sense, I think it is true for the vast majority of suicidal people. Death is not chosen because one wants to die, but rather because the alternative — to continue living — is too painful.

Now, if this phrase were to be directed at someone who is suicidal, in an attempt to change their minds, I can't imagine it'd be particularly effective. If anything, it might come across as invalidating, reinforcing that person's sense of isolation.

 

[Anonymoususer1234]

Sounds a little insulting to me. Who is anyone else to decide whether or not you're "truly living"? Probably true in my case, though. I'm a massive loser.

 

[tartvinegar]

If things aren't going poorly in my life, I would want to live. But I don't want this sense of pain, rejection and worthless that's consuming me. Every minute of being awake is so painful.

 

[shadows_and_silence]

eh, I'm not very sure- i havent wanted to live in a while but also maybe if i didnt go through all my trauma i would want to live? but at the same time i dont want to be the person i am, if that makes sense

 

[pthnrdnojvsc]

I do want to die. i would never want to live . why do i have to live another minute? Why do i have to want to live another minute? nobody has given an answer here . who knows what some pro-living human would say? but i don't care what any human says anyway and i don't really want any answer no one can convince me this is anything but hell. just venting just writing to my own brainwashing my own "si" .

i don't want anything from this evil world or evil life . for me i don't want any kind of life/existence / consciousness under any circumstances. i wouldn't care if i could have what some say is a "good life" don't want it. "good life" even by their definition is always temporary as it is until that cancer hits , or dementia or age 90 hits , the law of entropy cannot be overcome . but i don't care if there weren't pain so bad it makes everything else meaningless. but of course life is suffering and impossible to avoid. i don't care if there weren't any pain nor suffering i still don't want to live

 

[Prism]

It's essentially true for me, but I can't have the life I want to live, so...

 

[Pluto]

 

[middlelord]

I yearn death, but only if death refers to one's return to the state of non existence.

However, too many "evidence" points out that death is not non-existence. But rather just a phase in my existence (i.e heaven and hell in judeo Christian religions, reincarnation in hindu/buddhism, and many other forms of afterlife in other beliefs).

In that sense, because I already exist, there's a bigger possibility that I can't return to non-existence.

 

[Aergia]

I don't remember what living was like well enough to want it

 

[NonEssential]

I guess. I'm 25 and I haven't done things most people my age have done (get a job, drivers license, lose virginity, etc) so I'm pretty sure I have not "started living." Still, I feel like I'll possibly ctb before getting to achieve any of those.

 

[leloyon]

Does it matter? I cannot "live" in this life either way. This life is nothing but suffering, my only hope is reincarnation to escape it.

 

[killingmyselfcore]

i just want to mentally healthy with nothing to stress about, and away from my abusers
how can i live when ive been in the trenches for more than half my life? when im dead, im just dead.

 

[milkteacrown]

I think this is true for myself! The human brain does everything it can to reject the idea of killing itself, and the fact people do it anyway is a testament to the intelligence of the species as a whole. I don't truly want to die, I just have an emptiness inside of me. If there was a medication I could take that could fill the hole I have, I would take it in an instant and would probably forget all about suicide.

 

[Unhumanly.]

when I have lived enough I'll die anyway