Venting Yet another misadventure (Normies are amazing!)

[WhatDoesTheFoxSay?]

This morning I was mistaken about the time of my appointment with the dermatologist (not the first time this kind of thing has happened)—I thought the time was 11.15 am instead of 10.15am. The journey takes about an hour and a half, and, thinking that I could still make it in time, I promptly dropped everything and got dressed. After getting an earful from Mum about how careless I am, my brother offered to drive us to the hospital (very kind of him). We arrived early, only to find out that the appointment is next year!

Stupid mistakes like these are a reminder that I haven't made any progress with the 'adulting' thing. On a different note, I'm perplexed how 'normies' are able to think in years and plan in decades, when I'm already struggling to get through the day.

 

[I need peace]

I feel that, I'm 21 and every day is a new reminder that I don't have a clue on wtf I'm doing. As a teen I thought I'd ctb at like 16-17 so adult life was never even considered for me, and now that it's here I don't know what to do with it

 

[WrongPlaceWrongTime]

I always wonder how everybody else in the world seems to know what they're doing without a sweat. Then again, maybe most of them are winging it for their lifetimes

 

[WhatDoesTheFoxSay?]

I feel that, I'm 21 and every day is a new reminder that I don't have a clue on wtf I'm doing. As a teen I thought I'd ctb at like 16-17 so adult life was never even considered for me, and now that it's here I don't know what to do with it

I'm sorry you feel this way, and I hope things work out for you.

In my honeymoon years, I only cared about having fun. I had no long-term goals and went wherever the wind blew. That was, until I received a rude awakening in the form of illness. It was barely two months after I graduated from university when my feet became badly swollen. The illness then progressed to whole body joint pains until I was eventually diagnosed and treated a long time later. People I knew were pursuing their careers and settling into relationships, while there I hoped and prayed for a single pain-free day. Which never happened. At one point, nothing mattered to me anymore so I stopped caring.

Right now, even though my symptoms are more or less kept under control by medications, I'm still confused and not sure how to go about living a normal, happy life. I had been marinating in negativity after all, and I have gone too far down the rabbit-hole.

I always wonder how everybody else in the world seems to know what they're doing without a sweat. Then again, maybe most of them are winging it for their lifet

Same here. To help them run their lives smoother, I think that people do learn from the mistakes of the generations that came before, and do incorporate the experiences of others at the same time. As much as I'm tempted to say most are just following what everyone else does in a 'monkey see, monkey do' manner, I do think that some of them do try to find meaning in, and enjoy what they do.

 

[Pluto]

I've had stuff like this happen since I was very young. Eventually it makes one want to withdraw, and so the vicious circle begins. :(

 

[whatevs]

I think when you are neurodivergent what you're making visible is how intricate and delicate human neurology is, because even when defects or abnormalities are slight you will start to malfunction with "basic, everyday activities".

The truth is that these minimal tasks are very complicated from a biological point of view. I often marvel at how normies rush through the asphalt arteries of their colonies, with very little fatalities, for example.

Sometimes, when you are defective, you also get some excess or hypertrophy in an area along with the deficits. I guess that's better than nothing.

 

[WhatDoesTheFoxSay?]

I've had stuff like this happen since I was very young. Eventually it makes one want to withdraw, and so the vicious circle begins. :(

"It's just a phase", they say. I just can't seem to stop obsessing over my mistakes. With this internalisation of failure, you eventually come to the flawed conclusion that you are unworthy and different from everyone else. It thus becomes difficult to break the monopoly your inner critic has on your psyche, and to kick the habit of beating yourself up.

I think when you are neurodivergent what you're making visible is how intricate and delicate human neurology is, because even when defects or abnormalities are slight you will start to malfunction with "basic, everyday activities".

The truth is that these minimal tasks are very complicated from a biological point of view. I often marvel at how normies rush through the asphalt arteries of their colonies, with very little fatalities, for example.

I concur. People tend to take things for granted until they're gone. Peace and stability, food and financial security, and the ability to perform seemingly mundane tasks like driving a car, which requires one to be in good command of his/her faculties. Body and mind are closely interrelated—body affects the mind, which in turn impacts the body, then the mind, so on an so forth—and physical and emotional pain often goes hand in hand.

To many, a disabled person is a reminder that one's fortune can change at the snap of fate's fingers. As a consequence of an unwillingness to accept reality as it is, the disabled are often ostracised and treated less favourably by society. Sickness is a natural part of a life that is perpetually in flux. A clean bill of health will not last forever, and no amount of denial will blot out the truth. Denial makes the world go round however, and mainstream media constantly exposes us to unattainable and unrealistic standards of perfection. Social media too, plays a significant role in promoting ableism in the digital age, from censorship to cyberbullying to hiring discrimination.

 

[Pluto]

"It's just a phase", they say. I just can't seem to stop obsessing over my mistakes. With this internalisation of failure, you eventually come to the flawed conclusion that you are unworthy and different from everyone else. It thus becomes difficult to break the monopoly your inner critic has on your psyche, and to kick the habit of beating yourself up.

You've just perfectly articulated a concept I've been trying to express all evening. I'd say it's deeply fundamental to why many of us find ourselves in this situation.

To the human brain, the mere repetition of a statement is somewhat equivalent to the said statement being true. This is routinely exploited in education, politics, marketing, cultural propagation and all other attempted brainwashing.

Nothing is more intimately near to ourselves than our own minds, compared to any outside sources of information. And the nature of the mind is to try and understand situations and/or solve problems through incessant activity, even when the activity itself is the problem.

All that is needed is some mis-programming, eg. through close contact with an abusive person, and the mind will automatically create a self-destructive narrative, repeat it until it becomes 'true' and inevitably spiral into total self-destruction. Even more frustrating to witness this happening and feel powerless to stop it.

 

[Insomniac]

On a different note, I'm perplexed how 'normies' are able to think in years and plan in decades, when I'm already struggling to get through the day.

they're truly amazing aren't they.

 

[WhatDoesTheFoxSay?]

they're truly amazing aren't they.

Indeed. It does suck to be neurodivergent in a neurotypical world. On a positive note though, some of them do inspire me with their resolve and zest for life.

 

[karasu]

We arrived early, only to find out that the appointment is next year!

Omg this just reminded me of how I was so confused about what year it was. In 2021, I was convinced I was already living in 2022 and I pretty sure I thought that until someone corrected me during autumn of that year. So embarrassing lol. Now, I'm almost always a day or two off on what the current day is.

 

[WhatDoesTheFoxSay?]

Omg this just reminded me of how I was so confused about what year it was. In 2021, I was convinced I was already living in 2022 and I pretty sure I thought that until someone corrected me during autumn of that year. So embarrassing lol. Now, I'm almost always a day or two off on what the current day is.

Can definitely relate. In my school days I've had times where I would write the wrong date on worksheets and homework assignments.

 

[onlyanimalsaregood]

I don't think you have to beat yourself up. These things happen to anyone. Some people are just more distracted than others. I'm a very distracted person too. I kinda live in my own world and bublle.

 

[WhatDoesTheFoxSay?]

I don't think you have to beat yourself up. These things happen to anyone. Some people are just more distracted than others. I'm a very distracted person too. I kinda live in my own world and bublle.

Thank you. Yes, I get easily distracted and often struggle to concentrate. I've been told off countless times in my school days by my teachers and classmates, and at work by my colleagues and supervisors.