Story Yesterday was suposed to be the day

[Fragile]

I've been looking forward to this day for over a year, but in the end I decided to postpone it a bit more. The reason is that I procrastinated on some stuff that I want to do before I CTB, and I can't leave before I do it.

Also, if I die right now there will be a huge legal battle since I'm about to receive an inheritance, and the fucking vultures in my distant family are more than ready to fight for what doesn't belong to them, they always do it when someone dies in my family. I can't leave this mess behind, all I can hope is that it gets resolved quickly, then I can leave this inheritance to my mother and my brothers.

It hurts, because I came to a terrible realization.

I'm ready to go, I've been ready for quite a while and there's nothing I want more than to put an end to this. But my loved ones are not ready to lose me, they never will.

And now, I'm here, defeated, terrified of the future, I feel so down that I can't even cry, I'm trapped in this body.
The worst part is that my health is in such a poor state that I broke my vow to never make another useless medical appointment. I'm sure that they'll give me the same garbage medications and then they'll dismiss me, as always. All because they don't know how to deal with rare conditions, or they simply don't care.

My life is not going so well right now.

 

[WornOutLife]

It's okay.
Death is patiently waiting for all of us. There will always be "another time" to ctb.

Just try to do whatever you want to do. I really hope you can do everything and feel "satisfied".

I should do the same!

Best of luck,

Matt

 

[Fragile]

I really don't know how much patience I have in me.

Oh, well. I'll try to enjoy this while it lasts, if I can, that is.