Discussion Would your life been better or worse if you had or didn't have a sibling?

[LikeAPendulum]

Title says it.

I personally wish I had a sibling. I could've had a sibling, but it was sick and never got out, which makes me a little brother. Simply put my life has been hell, and when I remember things I don't want to remember, I sometimes wonder if things could've been better or worse if my older sibling made it.

 

[StolenLife]

I know for a fact that I would have been much better and mentally healthier if I have had a sibling. I only found out the other day, at 22 years old, that I was supposed to have a younger sibling but my mother had a miscarriage. I would have been more caring, less spoiled, and would have someone closer to me in age to spend time with. I was supposed to be an older sister but I guess it wasn't made to happen. This was just one of the many ways my ideal life got stolen from me. In this situation, as an only child, I will be the sole survivor of my family in 20-30 years, all alone.

 

[Dead Ghost]

I have a sister and whether my life would be different without her is irrelevant because we are not related. I've also always been quite a loner. But what is certain is that you cannot idealize the ideal brother and believe that he would be perfect, in the same way that you cannot idealize the ideal parents because at the end of the day they are still people with whom you cannot choose to decide how you want them to be
Nobody is perfect.

//

Tinc una germana i és irrellevant el fet de si la meva vida sería diferent sense ella, doncs no ens relacionem. També sempre he sigut força solitari. Però el que de debó se es que no pots idealitzar el germà ideal i creure que sería perfecte, de la mateixa manera que no pots idealitzar els pares ideals perquè al cap i a la fi no deixen de ser persones amb les quals no pots triar decidir com vols que siguin.
Ningú es perfecte.

 

[KQuotientW]

I was the scapegoated child in a narcissistic, abusive family. I was the only singled out for abuse from parents. Siblings were encouraged to join in taunting me if I cried about the abuse. Siblings can't see me as anything else so I stopped talking to my family many years ago.

I think my life would have been better if I wasn't born into such a shitty family. I don't understand the religious beliefs where they claim we pick our family before we're born. I don't see how anyone would choose a horrible family.

Part of the reason I'm catching the bus is that I don't have anyone to turn to and don't have any family around me for support.

One of my siblings is the CEO of Netball Australia. Don't care if he sees this. Loads of money, huge salary, doesn't care that I have a stalker, I'm stuck living in the middle of nowhere and that I can't afford to move to a safer location. Probably cried into his money during the pandemic lockdowns in Melbourne. Others have gone on to high paying jobs or marry someone who earns a high income. If I were to reach out and ask them for help, I'd have to accept being treated like shit again; I'd have to accept my role as being treated like I'm worth nothing. I can't go there again.

I live in a horrible little country town because it's all I can afford. Stalker of 9 years whose stepfather is a bail justice who tells his stepson how to work with the system and get away with all kinds of shit. Stalker has threatened me with a chainsaw, tried to run me over, damaged 3 of my cars, fenced off my driveway and used an excavator to dig up dirt, followed me to buildings and waited outside, etc. Won't accept that I'll never want a relationship with him. If I were to ask family for help, I'd still be in danger because of their shit.

My siblings can go fuck themselves.

 

[Celerity]

My older brother protected me from my dad who was physically abusive to him and would have been to me as well if my brother had not intervened. Watching your older brother and your dad almost get into a fistfight probably wasn't great for my mental health at age 5, but the whippings wouldn't have been great either.

My brother and I are very different from each other and don't really get along well, but I will never forget what he did for me.

 

[Install-Gentoo]

if I didn't, it would be VASTLY better. I'm not even asking so much as to say a "different sibling", just removal would be heaps and loads better. my god. literally everything bad ever in my life has been a direct result of my sibling.

 

[Celerity]

if I didn't, it would be VASTLY better. I'm not even asking so much as to say a "different sibling", just removal would be heaps and loads better. my god. literally everything bad ever in my life has been a direct result of my sibling.

If I may ask, why so?

 

[assisted]

My life would have been better if I had been able to remain friends with my sibling. I miss him a lot. My life would have been better if I had more than one sibling too.

 

[nosurpries]

my brother abused me when we were kids. my life would be significantly better if i never had any brothers.

 

[lonelygirl111]

better with them. when i think back to some of the worst parts of my life, i see all of my siblings there with me. it reminds me that im not as alone as i feel. because of how hard life is even with them by my side, i can't begin to imagine what it would be like if none of them ever existed

 

[Life_and_Death]

the problem wasnt my siblings the problem was my parents through my siblings. everything was fine until they were born, but them being born wasnt their fault. it just gave my parents what they wanted (boys that were theirs, while im female with a different dad) so she went back to treating me like shit. i love my brothers even if just today he annoyed me, but he only annoyed me because of his parents.
i want siblings without parents but sadly thats not how this works.

 

[nothingchanges]

It would have been much worse without a sibling.

 

[lofticries]

Only child here.

It really depends. Maybe I wouldn't be so lonely but then again maybe it might have increased the loneliness. My parents didn't want kids in the first place so that right there tells me things would have turned out worse.

 

[PainAndSadness]

Much much better

 

[EDMisgood]

I have seen lots of people who are genuinely happy with their siblings ' existence but I just can't relate because my life would be much less stressful than it is

 

[Message In A Bottle]

I would've loved a older sibling. It be helpful during the times I felt most alone - having a protector and someone to look up to would've helped me get through those tough times. And maybe I wouldn't of became the person I am now.

I used to daydream about what it be like to have a twin, since then I'd never have to experience loneliness. But sadly life doesn't go the way you want it to, and I would be the first and only one to come out of utero.

 

[fiasco]

If I had a sibling, I would not feel this lonely, probably. But then again who knows? My family might start comparing me to them.

 

[makethepainstop]

My mentally bitch little sister, who has caused me as many problems as a pack of fleas causes a dog), has also made me almost decide to reincarnate as an orphan. Now to have a big brother, that would be cool!

 

[S like suicide]

Well my parents remind me every day that they wished they had only my brother...i am the daughter they never wanted....just the other day my mother said to my brother (thinking that i was in another room not listening )that i'am a whore and a bitch and that she hates me and can't stand me anymore.
If i didn't have a brother,they never would have compared me to him for every fucking thing and much probably they would have loved me as i am not for as they wanted me.

 

[CatLover]

I'm sure it would have been worse with siblings (only child) as things always seem to be able to be worse, no matter how bad they are. I imagine that sibling would be 'normal' and successful and therefore I would be being forever compared to them 'why can't you be more cheerful like x?' and 'x has paid off their mortgage now, why are you still renting?' and 'why are you always complaining? why aren't you more like x and just get on with things?' etc etc etc Of course it could have made things better, if we'd been similar and had each other's backs against my idiot parents, but you can't assume things will end up going your way.

 

[not4us]

I imagine that sibling would be 'normal' and successful and therefore I would be being forever compared to them 'why can't you be more cheerful like x?' and 'x has paid off their mortgage now, why are you still renting?' and 'why are you always complaining? why aren't you more like x and just get on with things?' etc etc etc

You have just described my life lol