Would you live seriously

[jussrav]

Would anyone live with all the crap stuff happening,after one decision goes wrong. Before covid happy loved life no mental health services, no medication no doctors. After covid, long covid twice, brain tumour you are so angry at the situation you are being abusive to everyone. In turn you get people treating you like crap, doctors, psychiatrists not seeing you. This is not how I was. I was happy. I had relationships with family, siblings aunts. Now noone talks to me. I never had mental health issues and it kills me to have to sit there with doctors who ignore you. Or say you have a very bad 3 year history of mental health. Also now having to deal with a completely new person. The old one is dead. Died ages ago. The new one has a life that is unlivable dealing with waking up at 4am not sleeping, not eating, not living really. Not to mention during covid I lost my hair and my teeth. Please if anyone sees this I really need to die. But I seriously don't want to cone back I've had enough to last a lifetime. I've seen myself self destruct. If anyone can please tell me how to get out of this hell by suicide. I wanted to go on a cliff u need guts I might drive off but will I die? I was thinking sn but what if I live after and become blind. I am trying to find job in a pharmacy but I dont even think I can do it in my state. I was going to take pills to overdose because my doctor has stopped giving me pills.

 

[carac]

It's disgraceful what health services have turned into. They should be there to help people to live or if need be, to help people to die. Not to keep people in a perpetual state of pain and distress just so all these big pharmaceutical companies can profit from their "sticking plaster" drugs

 

[FuneralCry]

I'd personally never wish to exist under any circumstances, only death can bring me peace and relief from suffering, existence was something that wasn't worth enduring in the first place for me.

But anyway it sounds so horrible what you've been through, it's beyond inhumane how suicide is purposely made so difficult despite the fact that existence is so harmful and is ultimately responsible for all the torment that existing beings endure. I just wish there's a straightforward answer to leaving this existence, it would be such a relief.

 

[jussrav]

I'd personally never wish to exist under any circumstances, only death can bring me peace and relief from suffering, existence was something that wasn't worth enduring in the first place for me.

But anyway it sounds so horrible what you've been through, it's beyond inhumane how suicide is purposely made so difficult despite the fact that existence is so harmful and is ultimately responsible for all the torment that existing beings endure. I just wish there's a straightforward answer to leaving this existence, it would be such a relief.

I know its awful I hate it wish I could just go because I will just suffer.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I'm sorry you have too go through that and what you have to endure is so awful. Also health services seem to be shit in your your country. I can fully understand that you seriously consider suicide but none of us here can tell you whether you should do it or not. You have to make this decision on your own whether you want to go on trying to improve or you want to end agony and suffering. I hope you find peace.

 

[jussrav]

I'm sorry you have too go through that and what you have to endure is so awful. Also health services seem to be shit in your your country. I can fully understand that you seriously consider suicide but none of us here can tell you whether you should do it or not. You have to make this decision on your own whether you want to go on trying to improve or you want to end agony and suffering. I hope you find peace.

Improve i dont know if I ever will.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Improve i dont know if I ever will.

I fully understand that. I'm pretty sure I'd think the same way. When you made your decision to CTB you just have to find your method. I know it's also not an easy task and defeating SI is the next big problem. All this isn't as easy as it looks like.