PeacefulDreams

PeacefulDreams

Going down hill again.
Aug 16, 2022
26
I ctb in less than a week now, but I can't help but feel terrified.
I still want to do it (I think) but my mind can't help but go to everything that could go wrong. What if I mess up and end up with brain damage? What if somebody finds me? What if someone finds out I'm going to ctb?
I was hoping I'd be a bit more calm during my last week, but oh well. I probably deserve it anyway.
 
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lionetta12

Just a random person
Aug 5, 2022
1,108
I ctb in less than a week now, but I can't help but feel terrified.
I still want to do it (I think) but my mind can't help but go to everything that could go wrong. What if I mess up and end up with brain damage? What if somebody finds me? What if someone finds out I'm going to ctb?
I was hoping I'd be a bit more calm during my last week, but oh well. I probably deserve it anyway.
I'm feeling the same way, I'm a big overthinker and I don't like when things go wrong in general. It feels like a lot is at stake, nobody wants to end up with permanent brain damage. We already suffer enough as is and so it terrifies me that I might end up suffering even more when all I want is to be successful with the CTB attempt.
 
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PeacefulDreams

PeacefulDreams

Going down hill again.
Aug 16, 2022
26
nobody wants to end up with permanent brain damage. We already suffer enough as is and so it terrifies me that I might end up suffering even more when all I want is to be successful with the CTB attempt.
Maybe if I do get enough brain damage they'll use common sense and let me pass anyway. If I'm useless now I'll definitely be useless then
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
37,175
Your feelings are understandable. The fear of failure is what holds me back from attempting personally. It's so scary how ctb attempts can go wrong, we should all be able to exit this world in a peaceful and reliable way without having to worry about the chance of the method failing. It's unfair how ctb is this difficult. I hope that you find relief from your suffering.
 
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theboy

theboy

Illuminated
Jul 15, 2022
3,006
These are questions we all ask ourselves. Also, anyone who knows that they will commit CTB in a few days is very scared. It is normal.
 
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