Help Wondering how to find the courage when the time has come

[Nirrend]

Hi everyone,

Hope that you are fine,

i'm just asking a question here because, I don't really know how to act and what is the best way to act.

If everything is fine, I may ctb in middle october when everything will set up. But, because I live with my family, because friends sometimes keep calling me, I feel like I can't find a moment where I'm totaly alone, totaly preparing myself.

When people or life is catching me, I feel like I'm shakened by the reality, like this reality is kicking the bubble, the illusion I built to prepare myself to ctb.

So, my question is, "When everything will be ready for you, and the only thing you will need is to find the courage to act, what do you plan to do to make it successful ?"'

In my case, I wonder if by isolating myself, it will help me to act with confidence. Because I feel like we have to put ourselves into an "automatic mode" to act without thinking.

Thank you in advance for your answer

Loving you all <3

 

[Zegers]

When everything will be ready for you, and the only thing you will need is to find the courage to act, what do you plan to do to make it successful ?

When i get everything ready, just I'll do it one day, even jumping off the Burj Khalifa is a better idea than staying here stranded but it all depends how your life is, your mood, your hope...

 

[Mofreeko]

I'm just going to pick a date and time and then drink my salty wine. That's all anyone can do. I don't think there's such a thing as a perfect time to kill yourself. As for finding the bravery for it I'm not sure. Some people on this forum literally just show up, ask about their preferred method and then in a couple weeks they're gone. Others have been here for years making post after post about wanting to ctb, but never doing it. I don't know what the difference between them is.

 

[lonelygirl111]

i think when the time has come nothing will be able to hold you back. maybe isolating yourself will give you more courage to do it but in the end you'll know when you feel it's time regardless of the circumstances. im really sorry your in pain i genuinely hope life gives you peace soon you deserve it.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

If you live with others, it's best to plan your CTB for when everyone is sleeping, to allow as much time as possible to pass without being discovered and, possibly, saved.

 

[Girl-shaped Wound]

As for finding the bravery for it I'm not sure. Some people on this forum literally just show up, ask about their preferred method and then in a couple weeks they're gone. Others have been here for years making post after post about wanting to ctb, but never doing it. I don't know what the difference between them is.

Knowing one of those people who have appeared and then they were gone, I'm deeply ashamed of being undecided and wavering between life and death... Even if they wanted the best for me.

 

[Hope:-)]

Also wondering this. I think the 'automatic mode' thing you mentioned may help so I'm going to try it. If I keep plugging away at it I think I will make progress. My next goal is simply to make it to the hotel with no pressure for me to go ahead with ctb. Just a step in the right direction.

 

[makethepainstop]

My method of logic dictates to me that termination is the only correct alternative. My health cannot be improved without surgical intervention, that I cannot afford. My loneliness cannot be resolved. My energy levels have become exhausted. My financial needs exceed my income. Therefore logic says to ctb is the correct and only option. Love to you all.

 

[FuneralCry]

I think that if I had a reliable way to exit that is peaceful enough, then I would have no problems going through with ctb. I do think that many people find the courage to leave when they become desperate enough or they just simply know that it's time for them to leave, they feel certain and then they just go.

 

[theboy]

CTB's reasons for living have to outweigh the reasons for continuing to live