Discussion Why should we give a fuck about other people's feelings?

[Boudika]

I can't count how many times I've heard in the media or among friends that suicide is a selfish act because, after all, "you're hurting your loved ones." But why the hell should I care? They didn't care when they hurt us, when they flooded us with their problems. They didn't give a fuck about how we felt until it was too late. So why should we care about them? "Oh, you'll break her heart if you do that!!!" As if I care.

Am I the only one who thinks that the biggest egotists are not the suicidal people, but the people around them expecting someone on the brink of death to care about them?

 

[juraviel]

it's the sort of thing people say because they just have no understanding of what's it like. it's the same with the saying that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. as if there are no ever present problems in life.

though i guess if you want to get technical, yes it's a selfish act. but it's also selfish for people in your life to see you live in pain rather than having to lose you, is it not.

i think people my age (over 30) understand that platitudes such as those don't describe life well and if you're an intelligent person, capable of ascertaining facts in nuanced situations then you don't live by them.

 

[venomousSSërpent74]

i wish people who said things like this would understand what it feels like to be suicidal and not want to live,without saying we shouldn't because it's still an option and to get help along with many reasons why they think we should stay.only all those reasons we're already used so it feels like what their saying is a joke.like them saying that doesn't mean anything and they will say things like i'll miss you and you cant go.which makes you want to stay in some cases unfortunately its human to care for others.but you can also learn to stop caring all it takes is pain.

 

[WAITING TO DIE]

They will only care about us when we die.
Yet they won't really care at our dying, they will just be feeling guilt and self - pity.

 

[MG_39]

I can't count how many times I've heard in the media or among friends that suicide is a selfish act because, after all, "you're hurting your loved ones." But why the hell should I care? They didn't care when they hurt us, when they flooded us with their problems. They didn't give a fuck about how we felt until it was too late. So why should we care about them? "Oh, you'll break her heart if you do that!!!" As if I care.

Am I the only one who thinks that the biggest egotists are not the suicidal people, but the people around them expecting someone on the brink of death to care about them?

Some of us do have people who care about us, and wish they could do something. Me personally I don't want to hurt those who care about me and are there for me. So if I could I would rather suffer than ctb and leave suffering for them, but I don't know how much more suffering I can take. It's still painful that I will hurt them so much.

 

[tieiwi]

I agree. I want my ctb to be a haunting reminder for the people in my life. For them to realize the things they do and say don't just disappear one week later. I don't care if they'd be sad about my ctb. Maybe they should've learned simple concepts like empathy and gotten over their massive fucking ego. Anyway, I'm wishing you peace.

 

[mob]

In my eyes, the one wanting to end their suffering isn't the selfish one but the one who expects a suffering person to keep suffering so they don't feel guilt, or pain.

I'm actually convinced that nobody cares. No therapists, no psychiatrists, no doctors - they're just doing their job. This is what they get paid for. Others would want me to stay alive so they don't feel bad because I can't imagine anyone actually caring about the suffering I go through - but their suffering if I decide to put an end to mine.

 

[bini]

What if my family is trying to help me, but my brain is too broken to be fixed. I want to ctb so bad, but I can't get over the guilt. I can't take another day feeling like this but I can't get myself to end it all. But it wouldn't make me selfish if I do ctb. No one gets to live my life but me. I mean no one feels what I feel but me which is clearly too much for me, so I should have the right to ctb with no judgement.

 

[Iva]

when they're training people to work at a suicide call center they actually tell them to try and appeal to the suicidal person's emotions and not to logic. Telling someone "it makes no sense to kill yourself" is not nearly as good as "your mother and father invested so much time and love into you just for you to throw it all away." Anyone who wants to CTB has already run the mathematical equations in his/her head and determined that not living is better than living. However, EVERY human has a little piece of humanity inside him/her. That's why you can mention someone they love and move their spirit enough to hold them off from finding peace.

 

[princexhhn]

agree, we dont owe them anything. we dont owe them an extended suffering while theyve been the reason for it anyway. they say all that in the comfort of their world, where ctb is not an option and too much a taboo. they keep talking when they dont even know what its like.

personally, still care for how they feel. sure, theyre treating me like shit, but that doesnt mean i have to treat them like shit too. can get tiring to be the better person, but thats how it goes. dont wanna stoop to their level.
and of course theres people in my life who have not caused me any suffering at all, people who actually want me alive, but it couldnt combat the way im dying on this earth. i will truly care about them until my soul ceases, but that does not mean that i will back out of ctb.