Why is suicide so hard?

[anyoneshorizon]

I don't know what to do with my life I've been so convinced I am going to kill my self that I haven't really made plans. Everything everyone says about life is so miserable unless. I don't know what I'll do if I don't kill myself. I just want to get it over with I know it's what I want and I'm already prepared. I'm not sure what exactly is stopping me. I think I'm scared but not sure of what, maybe failure? maybe fear of the unknown? Or maybe the reality of what it really means to be dead no more life, no parents, no thoughts. I everyday I wish something will happen to me that would end my life like a car crash or being in the middle of a shoot out. I know I want to die but I don't have the strength to do it myself yet. I wish I was diagnosed with some sort of illness that only gave me a few months to live something that wouldn't make life too much more unbearable. I know there are many on this site that have some sort of chronic pain or illness and I might come off as ignorant im sorry. But sometimes I fantasize about it. No one would think why I killed myself. I wouldn't have to do it myself. I could die next to the people I love instead of alone in my room. No one would feel betrayed. And I could just feel alive knowing I wouldn't have to worry about so much.

 

[Zegers]

I'm not sure what exactly is stopping me

SI basically

 

[FuneralCry]

The answer to the question depends on the individual, some people have a method by their side but yet struggle to finally let go of this life (which could be the SI) and of course if one has limited access to methods, or they fear death, dying or the method failing actually going through with suicide can be difficult. I really wish that suicide is easier and of course it should be. But if you are prepared for ctb, at least you have the option of a way to leave this world for when the time feels right. I know that for many people just having a reliable plan of a way to leave can be a relief.

 

[Csmith8827]

It's really not dude. I didn't read your thread but if your truly ready and it's time I believe it all falls into place. <3

You'll figure it out.

 

[BpdQueen]

Omg i feel you !!!!! Same here fr!!!