Why is it so hard, yet it would be so easy?

[Kringle's Curse]

I don't understand why I just can't do it? I'm so tired of living this way. Always drunk, always crying and so lost. I wake up wishing I didn't. I hate this life shit, it's confusing. I'm just messed up :( . I hate myself.

 

[Ghost2211]

Perhaps you're not ready? Its not wrong to not want to die even when we want to die. I'm sorry you're suffering. I'm here if you want to talk about anything.

 

[TAW122]

It is so hard because of the SI (survival instinct) that all humans have built into them. It would do everything it can to prevent death. It is also "logically" speaking easy in the sense that a well placed bullet (of the appropriate caliber), cutting off blood to the brain (hanging, partial/full), and various other methods/things will end one's existence and suffering.

Also, just out of curiosity, what caliber is your gun? If it is something like a .22s or .17hmr or what not, then I would highly recommend getting something better as trying to CTB with a weak round would have a high chance in failure and tremendous pain, injuries. I don't want to rip on your method, but as someone who knows a bit about guns and caliber, I wanted to make sure you have the best chance of success if you choose to CTB.

 

[WhiskeyLulabuy]

It is so hard because of the SI (survival instinct) that all humans have built into them. It would do everything it can to prevent death. It is also "logically" speaking easy in the sense that a well placed bullet (of the appropriate caliber), cutting off blood to the brain (hanging, partial/full), and various other methods/things will end one's existence and suffering.

Also, just out of curiosity, what caliber is your gun? If it is something like a .22s or .17hmr or what not, then I would highly recommend getting something better as trying to CTB with a weak round would have a high chance in failure and tremendous pain, injuries. I don't want to rip on your method, but as someone who knows a bit about guns and caliber, I wanted to make sure you have the best chance of success if you choose to CTB.

I agree 22 would go through the skull but then stop mid brain
You will end up in a worse situation then you are in now

 

[Kringle's Curse]

It is so hard because of the SI (survival instinct) that all humans have built into them. It would do everything it can to prevent death. It is also "logically" speaking easy in the sense that a well placed bullet (of the appropriate caliber), cutting off blood to the brain (hanging, partial/full), and various other methods/things will end one's existence and suffering.

Also, just out of curiosity, what caliber is your gun? If it is something like a .22s or .17hmr or what not, then I would highly recommend getting something better as trying to CTB with a weak round would have a high chance in failure and tremendous pain, injuries. I don't want to rip on your method, but as someone who knows a bit about guns and caliber, I wanted to make sure you have the best chance of success if you choose to CTB.

It's a .25. I also have shotguns, but it's hard to reach the trigger without it being at an awkward angle.

 

[HorribleFeelings1]

It's a .25. I also have shotguns, but it's hard to reach the trigger without it being at an awkward angle.

Shotgun is the very very few methods that guarantees death. However you do whatever method you want to do but I would suggest a shotgun for obvious reasons

 

[Jean Améry]

Don't beat yourself up over this: it's not easy to bring oneself to do this. Especially with a violent method.

I wouldn't make a rash decision while intoxicated. Perhaps you could try to sober up for a few days and think things through.

I also think gunshot is a risky method: if you miss the brainstem you might end up a vegetable or worse still somewhat conscious but completely paralyzed.

If you're an alcoholic there are ways of dealing with that. I'm not telling you what you should do but I do believe in the concept of rational suicide. Killing yourself while drunk, crying etcetera does not fit that bill.

 

[ARW3N]

Is that a real gun? I wouldn't know because it's next to to impossible to get access to firearms in the country I'm in unless you're a criminal or landed gentry.

 

[ThatIsTheQuestion]

Perhaps you're not ready? Its not wrong to not want to die even when we want to die.

Seconded. There's no shame in slowing down and taking your time.

 

[Kringle's Curse]

Is that a real gun? I wouldn't know because it's next to to impossible to get access to firearms in the country I'm in unless you're a criminal or landed gentry.

Yes it's real.

 

[Defenestrator]

I wonder this often - I think the short answer is survival instinct, but it's mostly the glimmer of hope at the possibility of things improving. When that goes you know it's time to ctb.

 

[mesohappy]

It's a .25. I also have shotguns, but it's hard to reach the trigger without it being at an awkward angle.

I wouldn't trust the .25..If it was me Id saw off one of the shotguns,preferably 12 gauge.Im not going to need it anymore anyway after Im done.By the time I got done sawing it off,maybe Ill have changed my mind.Of course sawed off shotguns are illegal in my neck of the woods,but meh so are alot of things.But I wouldnt make any decisions like that with a head fulla booze.

Don't beat yourself up over this: it's not easy to bring oneself to do this. Especially with a violent method.

I wouldn't make a rash decision while intoxicated. Perhaps you could try to sober up for a few days and think things through.

I also think gunshot is a risky method: if you miss the brainstem you might end up a vegetable or worse still somewhat conscious but completely paralyzed.

If you're an alcoholic there are ways of dealing with that. I'm not telling you what you should do but I do believe in the concept of rational suicide. Killing yourself while drunk, crying etcetera does not fit that bill.

For years I seemed to think that I needed alcohol to "feel better",but Ive only just recently began to realize that it was all a lie..Alcohol may give a momentary comfort but in the long run it messes everything up more.Alcohol is the great deceiver and in the end the great destroyer,ever so sneaky and subtle.

 

[Kringle's Curse]

I think I'm gunna try partial suspension again tonight. If anyone want's to chat, that'd be cool..

 

[SuiSqueeze92]

For your trigger reach problem, just set it up on something and get some string. Bam.

 

[Backwood_tilt]

I think I'm gunna try partial suspension again tonight. If anyone want's to chat, that'd be cool..

Please make sure you research your method carefully. There are some challenges to partial that can result in failure.

 

[mattwitt]

The fear of death is more powerful than the fear of living.

 

[AlreadyGone]

The fear of death is more powerful than the fear of living.

This. Once it is reversed, it will be easier to go.

 

[S1mpleme]

View attachment 25441

I don't understand why I just can't do it? I'm so tired of living this way. Always drunk, always crying and so lost. I wake up wishing I didn't. I hate this life shit, it's confusing. I'm just messed up :( . I hate myself.

I do have same feelings, just SN instead of gun. I look at that and ask myself what should I do with my life.

 

[ansuperhero]

It's a .25.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/.25_ACP
Joules of three different bullets listed: 85, 89, 88

.22 Long Rifle - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

Joules of five different bullets listed: 178, 182, 191, 277, 259

All instances of suicide I am aware of involving a .22 LR pistol did not result in instant death (even though they were all direct shots to the head), but I only know of a few.

Also, there is only one rifle that fires .25 ACP which I believe I've heard of.
For comparison, Hitler used a 7.65x21mm Parabellum, and an FMJ variety on Wikipedia is listed as having 412 joules.