why is everything so unsatisfying

[trashisland]

unsatisfying and frustrating, really. I dont understand how anyone enjoys life when literally everything sucks. ive been so depressed these past few days and it's just getting worse. I mean ive never enjoyed anything but it's even worse now. I dont even want to eat or do anything. eating is unsatisfying, getting up is, just existing is. I dont think theres ever been a single thing that ive gotten any enjoyment from. I see a psychiatrist tomorrow too, I dont know what to even tell them. im just sick of constantly having to explain myself and my issues in this endless loop of referrals. it's just so frustrating. I cant see a point in any of this. it's gotten bad enough that even my dreams are just as unsatisfying. idk. everything just sucks and I dont know what im even still doing here. my world is shrinking which im grateful for since it will really make my mindset worse enough to where I could maybe ctb and succeed this time. but while im still alive everything just feels completely meaningless. I dont know how to deal with that anymore and it really sucks, I just want to sleep all day and ignore everything

 

[chaewon]

Please do not mention being a danger to yourself or anyone to your psychiatrist and try to avoid even bringing up suicide as a whole to avoid them reporting. I am sorry for ur suffering and I feel very similar and have even thought about it before in the same way you worded it. It is probably some cursed type of depression along with other mental illnesses. I wish you goodluck

 

[Forever Sleep]

It's something I wonder about too. Seeing as even the non (obviously) suicidal people I've known have still been disatisfied with large and fairly unchangable chunks of their lives. Mainly having to work so hard.

But yeah- I don't get it either. Do they genuinely still enjoy life enough to make it seem worthwhile? Do they even think about whether they need to live or- do they just take it as the status quo that they must stay alive and work from there?

I so wish there could be a worldwide survey- Are you happy to be alive? Have you ever considered suicide? Given the choice, would you have been born to begin with? I wonder how pro- life people really are.

 

[trashisland]

Please do not mention being a danger to yourself or anyone to your psychiatrist and try to avoid even bringing up suicide as a whole to avoid them reporting. I am sorry for ur suffering and I feel very similar and have even thought about it before in the same way you worded it. It is probably some cursed type of depression along with other mental illnesses. I wish you goodluck

dont worry, I wasn't planning to. the only reason I was referred was bc I have apparent visual disturbances that need to be talked about. I already know how bad it is when you admit you're suicidal, I dont think I'll ever be honest with them again about that because of the reactions. I wish you luck too, being stuck thinking this way sucks more than anything else