Help Why does the feeling of emptiness always come back?

[przeciwwymiotne]

No matter how hard I try it's always back. Almost like I'm predestined to be like this. Why might that be?

 

[nozomu]

I wish I knew. I wish I didn't have to feel this way every day. I'm so tired

 

[us_1999]

Maybe because life is empty indeed... I'm in the same state of mind now. So hopeless and tired.

 

[Regen]

I don't know. I feel the same. My therapist says it is because of trauma. And if you heal and hear your inner child this feeling of emptyness will be less...

 

[AmberianDawn]

The same thing happens to me, there are periods when I improve, unfortunately they are very short and I always fall back into the same thoughts and sensations of emptiness, hopelessness, the feeling that I am destined for suicide, I distance myself from people, and that is my life, a roller coaster....its really tiring...

 

[Hollowman]

It used to come and go for me. I've lost track of how many years I've been almost completely empty now. Dead inside.

 

[Not a Cylon]

It's a vicious cycle. You remember the scene from the Matrix when Trinity makes it above the clouds and sees the actual sun for the first time, before plummeting back to earth. That's how I describe it. I *know* I can feel good, I have memories of being incredibly happy and content but I have no idea how to get back there. Or if I even can.

 

[Josh007]

It's usually because you've become empty yourself. Your mind has become a customed to it so it seeks it. It's a really common symptom here. Sometimes members report feeling better when doing behaviors that support this state of being. Not that you should, just saying what I know.

 

[ForgottenAgain]

I don't know. I feel the same. My therapist says it is because of trauma. And if you heal and hear your inner child this feeling of emptyness will be less...

Literally the words out of my mouth.

I always go back to feeling empty and my psychologist told me the same thing. I've been doing EMDR and yet to see any results.

 

[Linda]

No matter how hard I try it's always back. Almost like I'm predestined to be like this. Why might that be?

I don't know, but if you keep yourself busy you might be able to forget about it. That won't fix the underlying problem, but it might help a bit.

 

[dinosavr]

Yeah it's fucked up and I'm currently trying to work on it on my psychotherapy.
I believe that feeling empty is a coping mechanism that we had to develop to overcome our difficult circumstances. And it helps, right? At first you don't notice that nothing makes you happy anymore, you're just glad that you're in a stressful situation and all of a sudden you're completely chill. It's great. And the longer it lasts, the harder it is to open up again, to start noticing and expressing your emotions.
To me, in this world, we're better off without feelings. But if someone really wants to live and enjoy life, emotions are necessary. When you're in a survival mode, there's no point in feeling anything. So, if it matters to you, you should definitely go see a psychotherapist and I'm almost sure that sooner or later, you'll be able to cry again, laugh again, cringe again, get angry again.
And don't forget that the fact you realized all this, it's already a huge step forward. Keeping my fingers crossed for you!!

 

[przeciwwymiotne]

It's usually because you've become empty yourself. Your mind has become a customed to it so it seeks it. It's a really common symptom here. Sometimes members report feeling better when doing behaviors that support this state of being. Not that you should, just saying what I know.

What actions for example?

 

[Josh007]

What actions for example?

please note depression is different for everyone. The type i'm describing is this: Withdrawing from social activities, spending exessive time on the internet, 24/7 thoughts of apathy basically spending time on mind numbing tasks and complaining about those behaviors. I know most people see it as negative and know it's the problem. However it's also important to note most make excuses for themselves and sometimes even make conflicting posts contradicting themselves. It's as though they had different personalities but it's not. it's because they have trouble accepting they prefer to be empty. and what's worse: trouble changing it. It's really hard to pull yourselve out that hole but it's doable I've seen many people do it. Just by asking that question you're already making progress.

 

[eatantz]

I'm going through this!! I have months of misery and then 2 weeks of everything being ok and worth living again. I hate it because i get so hopeful, i keep switching from recovery to suicide. Yesterday was so dark and empty for me, and now I'm stuck in this emotionless void

 

[CozyTime]

I can feel this need for life, this never ending lust for my dreams yet whenever I reach a step closer all I feel is that same old emptiness as always.

I hunger yet when I consume the hunger remains, like my body and brain require something simply unobtainable.

It is exhausting.

 

[przeciwwymiotne]

please note depression is different for everyone. The type i'm describing is this: Withdrawing from social activities, spending exessive time on the internet, 24/7 thoughts of apathy basically spending time on mind numbing tasks and complaining about those behaviors. I know most people see it as negative and know it's the problem. However it's also important to note most make excuses for themselves and sometimes even make conflicting posts contradicting themselves. It's as though they had different personalities but it's not. it's because they have trouble accepting they prefer to be empty. and what's worse: trouble changing it. It's really hard to pull yourselve out that hole but it's doable I've seen many people do it. Just by asking that question you're already making progress.

Woah, so you're saying that indulging in this feeling might be a good thing to do because it'll bring me to the state I desire to be in and thus give me peace and thus it'll allow me to move on with life?

I can feel this need for life, this never ending lust for my dreams yet whenever I reach a step closer all I feel is that same old emptiness as always.

I hunger yet when I consume the hunger remains, like my body and brain require something simply unobtainable.

It is exhausting.

When was the last time that you felt okay?

 

[ChronicPainExistent]

Woah, so you're saying that indulging in this feeling might be a good thing to do because it'll bring me to the state I desire to be in and thus give me peace and thus it'll allow me to move on with life?

I suppose the key word is might. In my opinion, indulging in feelings of emptiness (e.g., by withdrawing from people) isn't likely to really help most who are dealing with depression — certainly, an ideal end-goal would be to not feel this emptiness in the first place, and the natural suggestion would be to do things which can at least temporarily distract from the feeling, and then to keep building onto those things.

But who knows? I suppose one reason that this indulgence might help for some is that it may be cathartic.